kelsea98

I'm not even completely sure if I have ADD or something else or anything at all. And I don't even think I'm going to be able to explain myself well on here but it's worth a shot. I am currently in second year university and having a lot of trouble. Last year I only took two easy classes a semester, but this year I started with 4 this semester. I had to drop one cause I was struggling so badly with everything. I cannot remember a time in my life I was able to actually able to study and focus for more then 10 minutes. Whenever I do I find myself distracting myself with other things. I`ll be sitting studying, then get the idea in my head of something else to do and no longer to be able to keep studying till I accomplish that other task. I'm the master of procrastination, I can never start things ahead and usually start them at the latest possible time. I've found I've not been able to hand in a lot of things because I never give myself enough time. I find it almost pointless to go to my lectures because I can't focus no matter how hard I try. Even if I'm sitting a few rows back from the prof and trying my hardest to pay attention, I start to drift off in thought without even realizing it. I get upset a lot because I know I'm smart and can do well, but I can never do as well as I want. I already know I'm going to have to upgrade a few of the courses I'm taking because I'm doing so bad. Boring subjects I can't seem to do. In my chem class I'm 4 chapters behind and I keep trying to catch up but can`t seem to. Every time I`m reading the textbook I`ll read a page and realize that I hadn`t even payed attention to what I was reading and have to read it over it again. If my friends were to describe me they would probably say I`m loud, talk to much, random in my conversations, and other things that are more positive too haha. My room is the messiest thing anyone has ever seen, you can`t even walk on the floor because of all the clothes, its terrible although most of the time I can find my things that I need. My car is really messy too. I`ve gotten so excited about organizing my life with school, and my room, and car. I`ll make a calender of to-do`s and all these plans, but it never lasts. I feel like I`m always struggling, its like I`m drowning. No matter how hard I try I can`t keep ontop of things. I`m always forgetting important things, being late, and I just feel like a complete failure. Maybe this is how university is for everyone, who knows. If anyone thinks its worth going to a doctor or psychiatrist or any thoughts at all I would really appreciate it