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Old 04-22-2004, 08:52 PM   #1
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bluejulie5 HB User
refill on my hydro

I called the pharmacy today for my refill on hydro.
the pharmacist called me back, and said she talked to my dr. and he said
that he won't refill till i come in and see him (i knew i was supposed to make
an appt. but i havent yet. it has been a LONG time since i have seen him).
anyway she said, she thinks that he want's to lower my intake of the tylenol, because he asked her if she keeps hydrocodone 5. 325 in stock, instead of
the 5. 500 that i have been taking.....................
my goodness, if only he knew how much i have really been taking.
here he is trying to help me, and i am taking tons more of hydro. than
what he knows about.
I feel so guilty.
Also, everyday i am taking SO many pills
and I know i need to slow down, but I am NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so weak.
I have no willpower.
thanks for letting me vent
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julie

 
Old 04-23-2004, 04:27 AM   #2
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Banker HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Julie - when you are ready to quit, you will go get the help you need. You know where to go and what to do, whether that's Suboxone or a detox or cold turkey. You simply are not ready to quit. I just hope you do not wait until it's too late. Remember the people on this board that have overdosed as well as my own mother! It can and will happen if you do not get help. But you know this already...

 
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Old 04-23-2004, 05:46 AM   #3
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sadsister HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

bluejulie-
You are stuck-i know that feeling all too well-and bankers right-your not ready yet-but your dr. may end up lowering your dose..and maybe its a good time to prepare yourself to get off em'..i think i know how you feel-i went thru periods in my addiction-where i was just resigned to the fact-i am a junkie for life-ill never get off of it-so deal w/ it"-but it never sat right..i knew i had to try-have you ever got any real sober time-since you have been using?Are you just fearful of the w/d's?I think you want out-but are afraid of dealing w/ all the stuff that comes w/ it..and i can understand that!Thats what got me on suboxone.My last relapse was such a ballbuster-i was either going to die-or get off the h-so i chose the sub.
I wish i had the answers but i know myself too well-and when i was active-i was ACTIVE!Its up to you-all that tylenol is a killer too..i am worried about you-and i will be here if you need me.W/o giving you ****..you need help.
AA/NA/Sub/methadone/therapy/meds???
one thing is for sure-beating yourself up one perpectuates the problem-go easy-and get some help-
heather

 
Old 04-23-2004, 06:40 AM   #4
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Posts: 203
sammi HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Hi Julie, I don't think you and I have ever posted to one another, but I have always read all of your post. I totally know how you feel because towards the end of my Norco days, I too knew I was taking way too many, but I just didn't have the will power to taper or quit on my own. I have been on Suboxone for five weeks and would not trade it for anything. I know I'm still taking an opiate, which since I have chronic back pain it does help some, and I also know there will be w/d's from the Sub, but I'm not praying everynight before I go to bed that God will let me wake up in the morning. You have no idea how I feel like I'm living a normal life again. And if I'm not mistaken I think I read one of your post where you said you have teenage boys? If not do it for yourself, do it for them.

Have a fun and safe weekend.
Sammi

 
Old 04-23-2004, 10:38 AM   #5
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: massachusetts
Posts: 867
no patience HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Quote:
Originally Posted by bluejulie5
I called the pharmacy today for my refill on hydro.
the pharmacist called me back, and said she talked to my dr. and he said
that he won't refill till i come in and see him (i knew i was supposed to make
an appt. but i havent yet. it has been a LONG time since i have seen him).
anyway she said, she thinks that he want's to lower my intake of the tylenol, because he asked her if she keeps hydrocodone 5. 325 in stock, instead of
the 5. 500 that i have been taking.....................
my goodness, if only he knew how much i have really been taking.
here he is trying to help me, and i am taking tons more of hydro. than
what he knows about.
I feel so guilty.
Also, everyday i am taking SO many pills
and I know i need to slow down, but I am NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so weak.
I have no willpower.
thanks for letting me vent
bluejulie before i was on methadone i also took hydros ant where from 10 to12 a day and i to had a hard time stopping i get my prescription for 180 and say this is the last script yeah like that happened you do have the will power but your just not ready yet dont be so hard on your self when you're fed up you'll do the right thing in my situation being on methadone i ran out early called my doc and he wouldnt fill it and that was my breaking point i said i cant take this anymore these pills ran my life so i finally decided this is it and hopefully soon you will to my thoughts are with you and hang in there hugs kelleigh

 
Old 04-23-2004, 11:16 AM   #6
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Location: detroit, mi usa
Posts: 104
south249 HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

hi sweetie, your post sounds like my desperate post a few weeks ago. I was taking vikes es, between 20-25 a day, I knew if I kept up I was going to die from them. I reached the end of the road, no I did not run out of pills I had lots, but I was tired of living that life, counting pills, seeing what doctor I could go to next etc. So I found a doctor close to home, went to see him last monday, he put me on 8mg of subuxone twice a day, and I have never felt better in my life. My god I have energy, I feel good, I feel normal. Honey please take the step to get on this med, it will save your life, and I haven't even thought about a pain pill since. Its a miracle drug, if you need help or anything I am hear for you. Please try it.
hugs
south249
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south249

 
Old 04-23-2004, 04:26 PM   #7
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Kansas
Posts: 429
bluejulie5 HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

HI everyone.
I made an appt. with my doc for tues.
then called back the drs office, and explained to
them that dr. would not refill my hydros. until i made
an appt,(came to see him, actually), and since it was not till tues, would he call me
some in until then?
well i did not think that he would go for it, but my pharmacy
called right at closing time and said did i need my hydrocodone or not?
I could not go get them at the time, so i told them i had a couple left
to tide me over the weekend so i would come and get them on monday.
(i actually have about 30.)
Anyway that is where i am right now.........
The SUB sounds GREAT.
i was wondering though, would i have to go to a special dr. for that
or can i ask my reguar m.d.???
I could come clean to him on tuesday, and see if he could help me out?
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julie

 
Old 04-23-2004, 06:14 PM   #8
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Location: MS, USA
Posts: 1,578
John 808 HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Hey Julie,

I posted to you on another thread, but have not made it that far down the boards to see if you got it and posted back, but I am in the same boat you are in?
I feel like a pathetic, loser....do you feel guilty?
I'll be honest, I don't know what to do? I am more lost than I have ever been. The sub just didn't work out for me! Too bad!
Well, I have a crying baby, so let me go be "mommy."

I'll check back with you later,
Michelle

 
Old 04-23-2004, 10:23 PM   #9
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Join Date: Aug 2003
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bluejulie5 HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

HI Michelle
I could not find the post that you are talking about..is it the one where i asked you some questions?
YES i feel pathetic, too, and very guilty also.
spending tons of money, lying to my dr. etc etc etc.
All i can say is that at least YOU put out the effort, you should be proud of yourself.
Dont be too hard on yourself.
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julie

 
Old 04-24-2004, 02:21 AM   #10
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Posts: 1,193
Banker HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Julie - You have to go to a special doc but you can find him on the Suboxone website physician's locator. There are normally a few in every average sized city. However, I would also come clean to your doc. If you don't do something soon... Well, I'm just really worried about you.

 
Old 04-24-2004, 08:12 AM   #11
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bluejulie5 HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Quote:
Originally Posted by Banker
Julie - You have to go to a special doc but you can find him on the Suboxone website physician's locator. There are normally a few in every average sized city. However, I would also come clean to your doc. If you don't do something soon... Well, I'm just really worried about you.
thank you.
i am worried too.
__________________
julie

 
Old 04-24-2004, 08:24 AM   #12
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Twinlynn HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Julie - I think you should think about giving the Sub a shot...it's helped so many others. Talk to your doctor Tuesday. Good luck. Lynn

Michelle - I just hope when you're feeling more up to it that you'll see that addictionologist and retalk the "Sub" matter. It may have been the way it was prescribed that caused it not to work. Was it Suboxone or Subcutex? Believe me...I know all about "pathetic", "guilty", etc. You're not in this alone. take care, Lynn

 
Old 04-24-2004, 09:30 AM   #13
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Posts: 96
doggreensector HB User
Re: refill on my hydro

Julie,

I have felt the same way before "pathetic" "loser" "junkie" I have said all of those things to myself. I was treating my wife like she was some tramp, screaming and yelling like a maniac with the moodswings that the vikes brought on. I am on day 7 cold turkey and although my usage was not as high as some, I got up to 4-6 vikes a day and had been taking them for 14 months with a one month break. The withdrawals are not fun but they are going to go away. Some of the people on here have suggested Sub. It sounds like that this may really help you. I am only on day 7 but I am starting to feel a little okay. Do whatever you have to do to help yourself. Beating up on yourself just makes it worse.

Good luck,
Keith

 
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