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Old 05-27-2004, 07:11 PM   #1
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stillfromny HB User
Serious Problem!

Hi All,

I am in deep, I feel like I cannot escape and I feel useless and disgusted, I am a serious addict taking 8-10 Norco 10 a day. I order them online and lie to Doctors, I feel so ashamed, How did this become my life, I waste all my money on these stupid pills. They only last an hr anyway. No one has any idea on what I do and I will never tell anyone. Help me please! I really need to know how to do this on my own.

Do you feel weening off or cold turkey is best? I have 120Vic 5/500 and 16 Norco 10 left and I am tempted to throw them out.

Please help me!

 
Old 05-27-2004, 07:25 PM   #2
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Shemac HB User
Re: Serious Problem!

Do you have someone that can help, hold the pills so you can wean?

 
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Old 05-28-2004, 12:56 AM   #3
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Re: Serious Problem!

tapering will just cause sustained stress and symptoms, your best bet is to tell your doctor that you dont want to be on these med's anymore, Use Clonidine for b/p and cramps, Motrin, (they use Neurontin but I prefer depakot) and Visteril, if you keep getting those mini panic attacks with the vistaril then try a benzo for 5 days. I dont think they give phenobarb for out patient detox anymore. But I have some good knews.... you feel like hell, but you're not going to die!

 
Old 05-28-2004, 04:51 AM   #4
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Re: Serious Problem!

You got a couple options-tapering off the pills-or flush em' and cold turkey-im not a c/t person-but ive done it-and it hurts..but when you are done-about a week-its over-then comes the lethagy depression/etc..for a couple weeks-and w/in a month you are fine.
Ive come off huge habits c/t..and made it thru..but the trick is to not use again-so make sure you got some support-AA/Na-counseling-something.
Its standard knowledge that opiate addicts have a low rate of recovery-meaning relapse is part of the journey..so the more support you have the less likely you are to relapse into a habit again-there may be slips-but you want to do all you can to really be safe..no one knows???Are you alone w/ this?
You really should speak to an addictionologist-or therapist..they may suggeat a taper plan to wean you off...and prescribe some meds for detox...
hope this helps a bit..
heather

 
Old 05-28-2004, 06:14 AM   #5
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Re: Serious Problem!

you are not alone! you need to tell someone close to you immediately! i promise they will not be suprised--they will be relieved that you have admitted you have a problem. they will want to help. from my experience you need to go COLD TURKEY b/c then you will not want to go back. It sucks bad--BUT YOU WILL LIVE!!! go to a detox center. they can help, they won't judge, and you won't be alone. I've been in your shoes and I am now clean and sober for 2yrs. GOOD LUCK!! need more help just ASK.

 
Old 05-28-2004, 07:28 AM   #6
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Re: Serious Problem!

Still, definately cold turkey. I don't know of anyone who has successfully tapered opiates or opiods without going through withdrawal at the end. It is part of the process, and is unavoidable. Dump the pills and get the withdrawal over. Your usage isn't that bad compared to most of us, so I would expect this to not be terribly difficult. You can get some clonidine and trazadone to ease the symptoms. Good luck.

 
Old 05-28-2004, 07:45 AM   #7
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Re: Serious Problem!

Hi,

Thanks to all of you, I have a good friend who knows and does them as well. We had a talk about how we need to stop so I hope we can do it together.
We both has really bad childhoods and we feel its okay to take away the emotional pain, but its not and it only makes it worse in the end. I tapered yesterday and I woke up shaking and my heart was racing so I am scared...
I need to do something, this is not what I want my life to become.

I feel moody, irritable and depressed from them. They no longer give me a high or a happy feeling like they used to. Whats the point?

Addicts run in my family and I have an addictive personality as well. My Father started with pot and then turned into a crack addict. My grandmother was an alcoholic so I have it in me, I really have to be careful.
I think b/c of my Father behavor growing up, stealing, lying, sneaking out at night to get coke, him and my Mother fighting all the time, leaving me home alone all night, seeing him melt coke on the stove at age 10 left me emotionaly drained and depressed. On the outside, people think I have it together, I never really shown my feelings, always trying to please people in fear they will leave me like my Father did or that I am not good enough to be loved.

I am an adult now at age 25 and I have been on my own since I was 16 pretty much. I need counsling of some sort, it feels good to write this all down.....

Thank you all for the suppport, I think I am going to taper as I may not be able to handle the w/ds

Last edited by stillfromny; 05-28-2004 at 07:46 AM.

 
Old 05-28-2004, 07:59 AM   #8
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Re: Serious Problem!

Quote:
Originally Posted by stillfromny
I think I am going to taper as I may not be able to handle the w/ds
Still, I don't think you can avoid the withdrawals from opiates or opiods, taper or not. Plus, if you are affraid of withdrawals, it is very easy to relapse during a taper if you have pills in your possession. If you are only taking 8 to 10 per day, I honestly don't think it will be that bad. I cold turkeyed from 30-35 a day, and I only felt really lousy for about three days. Layer on to that your own admission that your personality is inherently addictive, the discipline to taper is extremely difficult, especially on day three of withdrawal. Just resign yourself to the fact that you cannot take these drugs, and get it over with as quickly as possible. It is honestly no worse than a bad case of the flu.

I would recommend you start right now, and take advantage of the long weekend. Come Tuesday morning, you will feel much better, be able to function, and have the worst of it behind you. Please strongly consider this.

Last edited by User 205000; 05-28-2004 at 08:02 AM.

 
Old 05-28-2004, 05:48 PM   #9
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Re: Serious Problem!

Thank you,

I only trust one person in this world and I know if I give them to her to hold for me, she will give them to me if I ask. I am so scared to throw them out, why? I feel like my world is coming down on me, like a cloud is over my head!

I never really had problems with depression before, I feel really depressed now and sad all the time.

What should I take for restless leg syndrome, I feel like ants are crawling all over me, shaking, heart palpitaions

Can someone die from this? I mean its alot of stress to put on your body

I need reasurrance, I would love to hear peoples storys more, how long it took , how long did the worst w/ds last?

 
Old 05-28-2004, 06:02 PM   #10
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Re: Serious Problem!

Still, you won't die (although you may feel like you want to!). I think the depression is temporary, and its due to the subconscious reluctance to give up something that makes you feel good. This will pass, and once your brain starts cleansing, you will feel better than you did while high. For the legs, I took clonidine for three days, and it really helped, plus, its non-addictive. As for duration of withdrawals, anticipate 3 days of feeling like crap, maybe another two of feeling kind of OK, then after that, each day gets better. As for the girl holding your pills, you want someone who won't give them to you, because every one you take, you simply prolong the withdrawal. This is why you need to get rid of them. When they are gone, you can't take them, and if you don't take them, you won't relapse. Think about it. Deciding to quit is a choice, so make it.

 
Old 05-28-2004, 06:43 PM   #11
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Re: Serious Problem!

id counsel a little patience for you. take your time here and do some searches with this sites search engine.[there is tons of info already here for you] you will be happy you did and more confident. look up opiate withdrawal, hydrocodone addiction, withdrawal etc. and others similiar to these and just take in all the good information previous posters have provided. you need to know right now up front there is no "easy" way out of the situation your in! in the end it takes supreme determination to stop using. surrounding yourself with support is the most important thing you can do for yourself when you withdraw!

PS the depression goes hand in hand with opiate addiction. im taking 3 anti depressants. they have helped me get some of my life back! look into it if your depression is that serious

PSS one option on the addiction issue for you might be to wean down to as small an amount as you can handle and then at that point going cold turkey. keep one thing in mind always, withdrawal is going to be there in some way shape or form no matter how long you taper, no matter how you do it!

 
Old 05-29-2004, 01:20 AM   #12
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Re: Serious Problem!

Hi,

****You're not alone in feeling ashamed, etc. But if you believe that it is a disease, there really isn't anything to be ashamed of, is there .... it doesn't make you a horrible person, and it's not a matter of will power ... it's addiction, that you cannot control by yourself. You need support.

***I agree with the person who said tell you Dr. and do a "detox" in a safe environment. I do know that these days, they are still using the clonidint patch, etc. but may treatment centers for opiate w/d are beginning to use suboxone for detoxing for 3-4 days, then wean you down off of the suboxone. That's how I did it when I was getting of a 24 a day vicodin habit. I could never taper...they do use Neurontin for mood stabilization. And they rarely use phenobarbital unless you are coming off of benzos.

you feel like hell, but you're not going to die!

****You just feel like dying when your feeling all this. It's rough but the acute part is just 3-5 days, then it gets better day by day....and try not to do this all by yourself. Ask for help. Even if it means going to some meetings and telling someone what you're going through.

*****Just make the decision if your ready that you want to step and get all the support you can. I agree with those that advised you going to some sort of detox center and getting medically detoxed one way or another. You won't be along there, and that will help, I found that out these past 2 months.

Take care,
Murphy

 
Old 05-29-2004, 04:28 PM   #13
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Re: Serious Problem!

Someone mentioned that a rapid detox would never make you want to use again, ehhh, they've proved that wrong by a large margin, actually one who leaves supervised detox after 5-7 days is (78%) to continue using within the next 21 days. That's why they have 28 day programs. it's going to take a lot of vigor and I still condone rapid detox even if out-paitient.

Treatment Ceters will use "subutex" for 7 days, not suboxone. Buprenorphine is HCI based and is very soluble in water. Suboxone has (naloxone) Subutex doesnt. they only use Suboxone for out patient programs because naloxone only works as an antagonist when it rapidly hits the bloodstream.

I would not go the buprenorphine route at that low doses of norco.

As far as being ashamed, a very good book to read is "Letting Go Of Shame" By Ronald Potter. Good Luck

 
Old 05-30-2004, 05:33 AM   #14
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Re: Serious Problem!

Reading thease posts made me remember my own fears about detoxing-which i still have-as i will be doing it again w/ the sub-
The fear of w/d is the reason why many of us keep going.
The vicious cycle.
Did you make any descisions yet about what to do?
I mean-you could try the taper-but as the others said-you still will have to go thru w/d on some level-i guess weaning down is the holding pattern-i personally could never wean-all or nothing..
Cold Turkey sucks-but when its over-its over..and based on your habit-really i don't think its going to be that bad.
I kicked a fairly large heroin habit-over xmas several years ago-(like doing 70 pills a day..lol)..in 5 days i went out for lunch w/ my mother in law.
Just 5 days-.5 days out of your life-for many years of better living is a very fair tradeoff.
Easy for me to say..right?
I had a drug dealer call here last night-asking if i wanted "anything"..after a year of not calling him.
I had just come from a family gathering that nearly ended in a fistfight-i was emotionally battered..
My first inclination was yes....than i remembered-all the pain ive been thru-and one would lead to a habit-i declined..
I can't get away from this stuff-it follows me around-esp. when im really going thru bad times...i am forever being tested.
Just look at the whole picture-if possible-keep going and your 10 a day may end up at 20-25 a day-or maybe someone will have some h and you'll try that.It keeps progressing-tolerance builds-habits increase-lives ruined.
Good luck-really think about your choices-and get rid of the stuff-
heather

 
Old 06-01-2004, 05:26 AM   #15
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stillfromny HB User
Re: Serious Problem!

Thank you!

I actually weened myself down over the weekend, I know I should just throw them out, I just feel it wont be as bad with a smaller dose. I only took 4 sat and sun and Today will be 3 and so on. Then they are done, I am done!

I asked this ques to Nikka, how do I get these drugs you speak of? From my reg Dr? or an addition Dr? I am ashamed to tell my reg Dr about this, so I would rather not...

I still have the w/d symptoms even without cold turkey so I know I am going to go through hell either way, I just keep telling myself the hell will be a little bit easier to handle...

Thanks again for the support!

 
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