When will I stop? When I am dead? - Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Thiswasyourlife · 09-01-2006, 10:19 AM

I just cant stop drinking dispite all the bad consequences. Do you think some people just never "get it". Thats the way I feel right now. I lost my job on Monday, my house is trashed. I wish someone would just pick me up and take me away. I cant do this by myself. I am tired of crying. Tired of lying, just sick and tired of being sick and tired. I called the AA hotline yesterday and when the woman called me back, my cell phone kept dropping the call. I felt and still do feel so isolated. I have nobody. I wonder what happened to me, to make me the way I am. I want it but I dont think I will ever "get it". Thats all...............

bkim · 09-01-2006, 10:46 AM

Hey there. Sorry you are going through such a difficult time. I would suggest driving to the AA office in your town. There should be someone there during the day. If that doesn't work, please go to the aa website and find a meeting for this evening. There are people there that will listen and help you as much as they can.

Tim

Thiswasyourlife · 09-01-2006, 10:55 AM

Tim, I am beyond help. I just want to feel better, I am in such a rut. I called the AA hotline yesterday and the first woman that called me was having personal problems and just said, get to a meeting. I called back and asked to speak with another person. The woman that called me back was very nice but I will be damned if my cell phone would work. My life is miserable. Even when I reach out for help I get nothing. Garbage in Garbag out.

rosequartz · 09-01-2006, 11:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thiswasyourlife

I just cant stop drinking dispite all the bad consequences. Do you think some people just never "get it". Thats the way I feel right now. I lost my job on Monday, my house is trashed. I wish someone would just pick me up and take me away. I cant do this by myself. I am tired of crying. Tired of lying, just sick and tired of being sick and tired. I called the AA hotline yesterday and when the woman called me back, my cell phone kept dropping the call. I felt and still do feel so isolated. I have nobody. I wonder what happened to me, to make me the way I am. I want it but I dont think I will ever "get it". Thats all...............

you have to want it enough to do something about it......
until you put it into action, it is only an idea......
keep calling and get yourself to a meeting

Blasterboy · 09-01-2006, 11:18 AM

Hi there, I'm a recovered alcoholic and my 5th birthday is in 3 weeks. I once was in the very same place as you and thought I could never "get it." I cried in my pitty potty! I cried in the arms of anyone who would listen, but at the end of the day the answer is simple, but not easy!!! Just don't take a drink "one day at a time." This had to be my intention and I had to make the effort to get my butt to the AA meetings and listen to people who have got well and recovered "one day at a time" from this disease of alcoholism.

You may be powerless once you take the 1st drink, but you're not powerless about taking the 1st drink and the support of been around people who have been their in the same place or similar is what saved my life. I hope you can find the inspiration and keep making that call and keep making the effort and keep placing your intention towards recovery; if you do you will "get it."