treelover

Dear Sophie:

If only there was such a pill, but you know -- if I didn't have alcohol in my life to help me cope, to help with the anxiety, I would have gone insane. I had to learn to cope with life without my little helper -- the wine, the booze, the men -- whatever. What I'm trying to say is that drinking is just a symptom. What is the root cause? Unfortunately, you cannot start on the road to self-discovery while you are still drinking so the first step is to stop drinking. Easy to say, I know, but very difficult to do.

I have been sober for almost 8 years and I don't have any answers for anyone -- I know what worked for me.

I went to AA a lot during the first 4-5 years because I couldn't stop drinking by myself. I got sober and learned a lot about myself. Most importantly I learned to love me and trust me, but that was after a lot of meetings and a lot of growing up and learning about who I was, what I wanted. Not what anybody else wanted or said or thought they knew about me, because in the end, nobody knows you but you. They might think they know you, but unless they have lived with you in your head for however many years, no one can begin to tell you what is right for you. AA gives you suggestions which, like I said are good to follow, but sooner or later, you find your own way, and AA may be that way for you, but just know, it's not the answer for everybody.

Like I said, I needed AA to get sober, but staying sober I have found a different path.

You may find AA to be a lot of things you don't like -- keep trying until you find a group of people you connect with. You don't have to buy into everything they say, keep an open mind. Remember, you dont' go to AA to make friends, you go to stay sober.

Good luck. Keep us posted. Remember, you just don't have to drink today, nor do you have to deal with all your issues in one day.

Simply,
Treelover.