I really do not understand what is wrong with me.
I really do want to get off the percs. I do. But i feel like i have no will power and now i am freaking out. I got another script from my dr. who is tapering me down. But i am not allowed to fill it till wednesday and that is the date he put on it. I was supposed to have enough to last me till wednesday, but of course, i took it all. Now i have one pill left.
Now i am freaking out. That means nothing for 2 days. I just don't get why i can't do this!!! I am so sad and depressed. I feel like total crap. I have no energy. I didnt get anything done that i needed to get done this weekend.
I am just sitting here and feeling sorry for myself.
How i am supposed to get off this crap when deep down i don't want to. Yet it is a paradox because at the same time i do want to quit. I am snappy and irratible. ANd i am so not social.
People keep asking what is wrong with me. And i never pick my phone up anymore.
I keep thinking that the pills are helping but i know that because i have been on them for so long that they end up making me not happy.
WHy can't i just get some strength and follow the taper?
Please help me.... I don't know what to do anymore. Eventually the scripts are gonna run out b/c the dr. thinks that i am following his taper.
(Not so perky today)