Re: I hurt wife
Just thought I'd chime in since I'm on the flip side of a similar situation:
I know how your wife must have felt when she found out. I'm sure she was deeply hurt, wondering who you really are, confused, betrayed, and disappointed. But she also has deep love for you which led her to seek counseling and try to support you. Good for her!
My boyfriend swore up and down he would never choose drugs over me. Well he did, and I had to find out by accidentally finding his stash, and I was so hurt by it. I can't trust him now. He was leading me on like he quit which makes things worse because that tells me he's comfortable lying to me in order to keep drugs in his life. For me it's not just about the drugs, it's about his character, it's about who he is and how he makes decisions and his priorities. What he's willing to risk in order to stay high. It's scary for us women when we depend on guys and they go and risk everything just to escape reality for a little while or for whatever the reason is. At least that's my view. I have never gone beyond alcohol so I can't say I understand the addiction side of it. But women like stability and dependability. When things like this happen we are upset, then try to understand because we love you men too damn much, eventually come around, and forgive and forget. But there will come a time, IF it happens again and again, that it's just too much to repeatedly get hurt and we will leave.
Always think of this as your last chance to keep your wife. When you make the conscious decision to do drugs, you are making the conscious decision of losing her and everything you care about. Just think to yourself next time you get an urge, is it worth it??!!
Hope this helped shed some light from the flip side.