Re: i'm a loser and it won't stop
Please, first and foremost, do NOT think of yourself as a looser because you are NOT a looser. You are a human being who has stumbled and realizes that you've made a mistake that needs to be corrected. A looser would know there is a problem and do nothing about it to make things better. You know there is a problem, have admitted to it and are seeking help.
It sounds to me that in your heart, you know you are a good person who deserves better than what any addiction can give you. This takes courage, strength and most of all, "Love of Self". These things are worth so much sweetie.
I'm glad you are reaching out for help because that is a step in the right direction. It's not going to be an easy road, but you can do this, and coming here was the right thing to do.
You will find so much support here, so please continue to check back and share your feelings during this journey.
I wish you the very best of success. Take care and know that you are worth the effort!