It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 06-06-2008, 04:54 AM   #1
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,404
reachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB Userreachout HB User
Just wanting to share

Hi Guys

I am up earlier than usual as I have to make a trip about an hour away to attend the funeral of my aunt. Last night we went down to the wake. She was a special aunt and my Mom's last sister. Two months ago, my Mom's brother passed on, so it has been a time of some sadness especially for her. She is the baby of five siblings and now it is only her. I hurt for my Mom as she struggles with the grief.

Last month, a friend of mine passed away at age 51 from cirrohhsis of the liver. She was an alcoholic and it claimed her life earlier than need be. Her husband passed away years ago from illness and now the only child is left on her own at 20 years old.

So I am not sharing for the boo-hoo effect here. These things are a part of life and while it is a time of mourning for me, I have learned in my journey to recovery how to mourn and move on. This is what I wanted to share.

I have written often about facing life on life's terms. This is something I could not do for many years. I used pills to hide from the emotional pains in my life. I tried to hide from deaths, illnesses, hurts and fears. Funny how something as small as a pill can make us think we can hide from these things. The walls we build with pills are like the straw house one of the three little pigs built that got blown right down with a coule of huffs and puffs. That pig's straw walls were no stronger or sustainable than pills were to me.

Today I can deal with life even when it is hard because I am sturdier and my fortress is built with bricks now, like that third little pig's. The bricks are the tools I gained working to be pill free, addiction free. Oh, I am sad of course, but I can participate in the needed grief and mourning and not make useless attempts to hide from it anymore. And I will move on because that is what life is about... moving forward, moving on.

I know many have fears about living life sober without pills or alcohol. I sure did. Did. Not anymore. In finding sobriety, I have found the ability to live in it and it comes more easily than I ever imagined it would. While it involves feeling the pains life can bring, it also allows us to feel the joys life brings. It allows us not to fear feeling anymore. When we are able to allow ourselves to feel again, we allow ourselves to be participants in life and not just bodies existing in the world. It is so much better than the hiding in a haze.

So today I am able to feel. It may be sadness, but I can feel. And because I know that I am also capable of feeling joy and happiness, too, there is a balance in life for me.

This balance is there for each of us. It is not only possible to handle life in sobriety, it is a life enriched with feelings.


Sponsors Lightbulb
Old 06-06-2008, 05:50 AM   #2
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: NY
Posts: 837
FullCircle08 HB User
Re: Just wanting to share

There is nothing better than a cup of coffee and some words from "reach".

Here to 90 days today!!

"1 is too many and 1000 is not enough" -

Old 06-06-2008, 07:12 AM   #3
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Backwoods Maine. USA
Posts: 375
jerry111165a HB User
Re: Just wanting to share

Med, you rock. Congrats, and what a lifestyle change,huh?
Inspiration, inspiration.

Reach, g'mornin', and thanks.

Have a great weekend, you two.


Old 06-06-2008, 01:25 PM   #4
Phoenix's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,894
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Just wanting to share

Hello Reach,

Your insight is thought provoking and yet inspirational at the same time.

It is said that in order for you to feel something, you first have to experience something(okay, I say it).

I feel your words, reach.

Take care.


Old 06-08-2008, 09:42 AM   #5
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Florida
Posts: 381
g8trgrl15 HB User
Re: Just wanting to share

Just saying hello to Reach and as always she's an inspiration..

It's Sunday morning, and I'm feeling very good today.. Hope everyone else is having a great day!!

Love to all,

Old 06-11-2008, 03:54 PM   #6
Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: St Louis MO
Posts: 47
wisteria63 HB User
Re: Just wanting to share

Hello reachout,
You are a very special person and I hope you know this. Your words not only help yourself but others as well.

You are truly a gift to all.

Thank you,

Old 06-12-2008, 06:45 AM   #7
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 262
Stitcher317 HB User
Re: Just wanting to share

Wis - Nice to see you are still around. I've been thinking about you lately. How is everything going for you and the children? Has your hubby faced his demons yet and made any decision about his addiction?

Hope all is going well for you now that school is out.

Have a great day.....

Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
just really need advice MYSISSYGIRLS Relationship Health 4 02-26-2010 12:47 PM
Husband 53, just diagnosed, T2b? jhb123 Cancer: Prostate 10 03-03-2009 02:38 PM
Just want to share this story...are you ready for a few goosebumps...? petal*pusher Miscarriage & Still Birth 2 09-14-2008 08:35 AM
I just don't know anymore mel1977 Relationship Health 8 05-14-2007 11:31 PM
Hashi's/Hypo & just wanting to quit my job! How do you function? Am I nuts? zosolizard Thyroid Disorders 14 06-15-2006 03:06 PM
Is It Better To Be With Someone Just Like You? OutToLunch Relationship Health 47 03-17-2006 08:06 AM
I just wanna know..What is Marriage ? midblue_alone Relationship Health 5 01-19-2006 12:55 PM
Just a thought about my Mom promisez Relationship Health 51 09-11-2005 10:16 PM
Just wanted to share my experience with alternative treatments instead of LEEP... ca501 Cancer: Cervical & Ovarian 1 02-04-2005 07:46 PM
just a liar with nothing to lie about? lola7 Addiction & Recovery 15 06-25-2004 02:02 AM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Sign Up Today!

Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

I want my free account

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:59 PM.

Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2015 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!