What types of things is an evaluator (doctor, pyschiatrist, therapist) looking for to decide whether or not I am really an addict? Are there some specific behaviors, or actions, or ways of thinking that will diagnose me as an addict? I don't know if I am or not. I just know that even though I started on the med the same as most addicts (chronic pain), I certainly did not continue using as most addicts. This is Day 15 for me and I have not had any cravings or problems at all since Day 3.
I don't think I mentioned that I have to go to rehab or else I will loose my job. This is what is giving me anxieties. I will end up having no income for 4 months or more. With no money coming in at all my poor fiance will have to deal with eviction and a move all on her own, not to mention the possible loss of cars. She just had vocal cord surgery so she can't speak for a week and then for the next month she is very limited as to how much she can communicate in a day while the cords are healing (excessive use will make them scar). I can't imagine her going through all this anguish alone not to mention having her be alone for the next 90 days.
I have some loans from friends and family but well short of what we need to keep things stabilized. I don't know how I am going to make it through rehab knowing she is out there dealing with all this.
vernson, you said it was day 15, is that day 15 of you not using? I am not sure I understand, and why would you go to rehab, and then let your employer know? Did they figure it out, and what were you using? Also why would you need to go to rehab if you are on day15 and have had no problems since day 3?
We want to help you, but I think we need more details. Also, do you still have chronic pain?
Yes, because of the strictness of my profession I have to go to a 90 day prgram. There is no compromise no matter what I tell them my current status is. So it is sore spot for me right now in my life. Very, very disruptive. My last pill was on May 30th. And the only problem I have now is slight sleep issues. I have no cravings and no other issues. I used Vicoprofen for over 1 year at 3-4 tabs a day. I had no problem quitting because I had been preparing for it for about 6 months prior to being caught. Reading the posts here I know that just because I quit once it doesn't guarantee life long abstinence, but I the way I feel right now I don't see how I could ever let myself get into the physical dependance cycle again that I hated so much.
Why can't you do an outpatient program so you can keep working? Your drug abuse was not that bad??? My previous employer had mandatory rehab, but not inpatient. We only had to stay inpatient for a month or so if the addiction doctor insisted on it. Two weeks off the job was a mandatory requirement, so most people spent at least two weeks inpatient. The 90 day chip for AA or NA was required, and they insisted that you verify that you attended all of the meetings.
They did, moreover, require that the employee who was caught sign a last chance agreement, and they were constantly looking over your soulder. Two strikes and your out, as they used to say.
It's really unfortunate we have non-professionals mandating treatment based on criteria that don't make sense. For example, the Dept. of Public Safety in our state requires a certain number of hours of treatment for a DWI offender to get their license reinstated, whether treatment is medically necessary or not.
In your case, based on your own statements you experienced a physical or psychological dependency on a particular drug for a period of time. Your use of this drug compromised your employment (and perhaps other consequences.) By most definitions, you are an addict. You may not see yourself as an addict because you are assuming all addicts have more difficulty than you did abstaining. Cravings can be an indication of the SEVERITY of an addiction, but not all addicts experience cravings that are more than a mild annoyance.
In any case, you would probably be successful at recovering from your addiction without structured treatment. There is a term for that: natural recovery. That, unfortunately for you, does not seem to be an option. Treatment may be a pain in the butt for you, but the treatment itself will not do you any harm. Being labeled an addict is another story!
If you have to do it, make the most of it. Learn everything you can from treatment. I can almost guarantee that you will find yourself in a position to help someone else someday, and what you learn in treatment will prepare you to be a knowledgeable resource for someone who may need treatment a lot more than you do.