Hey everyone, its nice to be able to post on the forums for once, instead of just reading everybody's helpful stories.
Let me start by saying that I'm addicted to snorting heroin at 18 years old, and am in need of help/advice since this is the only place I can get it from.
I have a long story of how i got into something so bad at such an early age, but I will try to sum it up as much as possible;
At age 16, in high school, I started taking vicodin (hydrocodone) for recreational use. I never got addicted to it really, I just took it whenever somebody could sell it to me, and it was 'the best feeling in the world'. About 8 months later, a kid i knew introduced me to oxycontin. I started by taking a third of a pill at a time ( not sure, but it was either a 40 or 80mg). Now THIS was the greatest feeling i have ever felt. I bought a pill or 2 from him and went to school on it a few times and it really made me love school and life. ( or so it seemed to)
One day, this kid in my school known for dealing every drug imaginable, told me he could get me some amazing OC. Ofcourse i said yes, and it was only $20, compared to the 30 i payed the previous person! When i tried this "oc," THIS was now the most amazing thing i felt, at the time. It was so good, it almost felt unreal. I bought it again the next day, and after i did it the second time, my good friend told me that is was heroin. I was in shock, because I would neever do it willingly, (I know that it is close to OC, but still) even though I kept doing it gradually raising my tolerance higher and higher. I have been in this hole for almost 2 years now. I just turned 18 a few days ago.
Anyway, back to the point, I got addicted to snorting it ( thats the only way i've ever done it) and have attempted a few times to quit using suboxone, failing every time. I am trying to figure out if there is any advice or help anybody can give me, no matter how much or little you think it will help, because at this point, I dont think i can go much further back. I'm looking for help, more specifically the best/easiest way to quit.
I very much appreciate everybody that took the time to read, and reply to my post. Hope to hear from ya' soon.
There is no question that opiates are great, that is why so many people get addicted to them. The stronger the opiate (like heroin), the greater the feeling. Your story really makes me think about my own kids (5,2,2 months) and what type of struggles they are going to have later in life. I have such an addictive personality, I get addicted to anything and everything, and I know much of that is genetic. Some people can take their opiate pain medicine exactly as the doctor wanted and never become addicted, other people take it once and feel great and they begin a lifetime of suffering and misery. Addiction untreated never ends well.
You said you were looking for opiate advise but didn't really say what you wanted. Are you looking to quit taking them or justify your use of them? It sounds like you want help to stop and it was really eye-opening to you to find out you took heroin. You are still very young and you have your entire life ahead of you. I don't think anyone would chose a life of addiction: selling everything you have to maintain a drug habit, lying to everyone you know, losing your friends/family/self, hitting rock bottom in an alley alone and scared? It doesn't always end that way, it could end in death from an overdose. Heroin is a Level 1 controlled substance which means it is NEVER prescribed from a doctor in the USA so anything you get is manufactured illegally. That means you never really know the purity, quality or amount you are taking. One pill could be an overdose.
You really should talk to someone and get some help now while you are still early in the addiction. It is much easier to quit now.
yea ship, that's exactly what i was looking for help with, quitting. I'll edit that into my first post.
Was just wondering if there is a best way to do it.
and sadcomp., yes, you are totaly right. Like i said it's been 2 years almost doing this crap and pretty much all the money i work for goes to it. Everything is so much worse than it used to be with my family, even though they don't have a clue about it. Not any of my younger 4 brothers and sisters or my mom.
And about getting help, I rather quit cold turkey (which i dont think i will) than let my family know about this demon.
Im at the point where it isn't as bad as can be yet (do about 2-3 bags a day) but if i dont do it for a day, I get horrible withdrawls. And i can't quit when i have work because I went to work sick once, and it was the worst day of my life. Unless I have a suboxone.
Bless your heart, takes guts to tell strangers about your abuse...I wish you well and strength hang in there! I am not an expert or even someone who has used but my son is in the simular situation as you but he is much older. I think with you admitting and wanting to quit is a huge step in the right direction! Please continue to want to quit and with each day it will become a way of life for you and you will have success. Be safe and be strong. Diann
First, you're already on the road to recovery, since you recognize your addiction, and want to do something about it. So, you're ahead of the game. Now, just follow through, and get in to a reputable program. My gut-feeling is that you'll succeed - you have a great attitude, and are open and honest about your addiction. Keep us posted, and all the best to you.
Hi!! Well since I have delt with this same thing...Id have to tell you that you would have to WANT TO QUIT or it wont happen. Suboxin works great...u jusat have to tell urself u are talking it everyday!! I know its hard. You neeeed to stop now before you start using it the other way and then there is no way out really unless there is a miracle behind you for you to get off that way. My brother od back in 2006 at 21 y/o and that was MY wake up call there. To see my family in all that pain and not even knowing he was ever using was just a shock to everyone. I couldnt let that happen again or to me. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Plz. plz, plz get help and get off that stuff. For you, your family, and your life, plz STOP! I hope you stop and never look back. Best of luck all the way from Detroit....
Last edited by mod-anon; 09-13-2010 at 08:31 AM.
Reason: removed quote
G boi: I lost my best friend to heroin way back in high school. Not trying to scare you, just letting you know that you never know what you are going to get with heroin. You might get a super strong batch, stop breathing, and die. Do you have insurance or do your parents have insurance? If so, get a referral to an addiction specialist. Be completely honest and tell him/her exactly what you are taking. Follow their advice.
I would not attempt to get off of everything by myself if I were you. You could have a seizure and die. If the doc. recommends an in-patient detox and your insurance will cover it then you should take the opportunity while you have it. You are 18 and are done with high school or almost done. Think of detoxing and finishing high school as a new start. Go down to the nearest community college and talk to an advisor. Get a job working swingshift and go to school in the daytime. If you still have spare time then do something athletic like running or lifting weights or yoga. When you work out your body will generate endorphins and you will feel like a million bucks without heroin. The point is - you will have to stay busy and occupied to beat heroin. Spare time is the killer.
Last, at least find a narcotics anonymous group you can go to and be completely honest with everyone there. If you go to meetings long enough you will get a "sponsor". You can call your sponsor when you feel like you have to use and they will help you stay clean.
Sorry I didn't reply earlier. Sometimes it takes a few weeks before people chime in.
Please keep us updated. You are young and can build a kickass life. Get your education and stay fit. Take care.
i really don't know if this will help or not, but here goes.....
i lost several friends (including my BEST FRIEND who died in my arms) to heroin...naturally, i hated it and NEVER thought the day would come that i would try it...much less become addicted. I have now been addicted to various forms of opiates for the past 5 years and my life has become completely unmanageable. I have lost many friends and my family no longer trusts me. I have been to rehab 2 times and am currently on the call back list to go again...it is SO EASY to get on drugs and seems nearly impossible to quit. but, i think when you stop even trying to quit and accept your drug addiction THAT is when your life is gone. so, keep trying. i dont care if it takes you 900 times to finally "get it"...don't give up and give in to it. i know its hard because it feels so damn good and it is the lifestyle we have become used to. but, you do not want to look up and realize you are 40 years old and have wasted your life chasing a pill or a bag of dope. i met a man 2 weeks ago in a dope hole that was 63 years old and has been using for 40 ++ years and he was telling me that he has NO VEINS left in his body.....and he has hep c. he is telling me this as i sit and watch him skin pop his heroin shot. scared the pee outta me and caused me to once more, sign into rehab. so, please, if you fail a hundred times, eventually you WILL get it the ONCE so keep trying. methadone is just another poison and suboxen (spelling??) is good for very short periods of time....just to help you through the withdrawals. but try try try. if you dont get it the first 80 times, try 81 times!!! i know the moment i lay down and accept this addiction as MY LIFE is the moment that i throw my life away. good luck, man!
My nephew in law's sister od'ed on heroin a few months ago and my niece od'ed but came out of it. She almost died.
Since you have been on it so long, I too suggest professional help. And you must be determined. Weigh the pros and cons of using and keep reminding yourself of the cons. And don't listen to that voice that tells you to quit "tomorrow." It's a lie. Get help asap and move on with your life.