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Old 09-01-2012, 12:37 AM   #1
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Ramblings of an opioid addict.

I have been battling an addiction to heroin and other opiates since 2004. I have a wonderful wife, 6 kids and an awesome full time job. I spent 2009 - 2011 clean as a whistle. Earlier this year I was in a roll over accident in a 34,000 lbs flatbed truck. Was blessed enough to walk away with minor scrapes, bruises and a broken elbow. I have scoliosis and spinal stenosis both congenital. It took years for me to kick the opiate habit and only one accident to fully embrace it once again. I am more than ready to return to a life of sobriety. My bank account can't take much more and the sneaking around is wearing on my relationships with my family. First of all I need advise in coping with the withdrawal symptoms as this fuels my urge to use. I had been going to LDS 12 step before and am ready to start those meetings again regularly. Lots of prayer has also helped. Thank you in advance for any support and advice.

 
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Old 09-01-2012, 08:10 AM   #2
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Re: Ramblings of an opioid addict.

Hi there.... I am going through something similar. My thread under this basically sums it up. I think hope is what we all need. I think about my next pill all day an am taking mor than my rx states.... Problem is I love the euphoric feeling and am chasing it... At this point i take it only to feel normal and not wd.

 
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Old 09-01-2012, 09:22 AM   #3
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Re: Ramblings of an opioid addict.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ironhead70 View Post
I spent 2009 - 2011 clean as a whistle. Earlier this year I was in a roll over accident in a 34,000 lbs flatbed truck. Was blessed enough to walk away with minor scrapes, bruises and a broken elbow. I have scoliosis and spinal stenosis both congenital. It took years for me to kick the opiate habit and only one accident to fully embrace it once again. .
Ironhead70,

There are times that traumatic situations can lead to relapse mode.
You've suffered a traumatic experience,psychologically(the rollover) and the physical(broken elbow).
The physical and psychological may be related.

If step programs don't do it it for you or don't seem enough,might I suggest seeing a therapist that specializes in trauma.

Respectfully
Phoenix
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Old 09-03-2012, 09:51 PM   #4
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Re: Ramblings of an opioid addict.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Grantmetheseren View Post
I think hope is what we all need. I think about my next pill all day an am taking mor than my rx states.... Problem is I love the euphoric feeling and am chasing it... At this point i take it only to feel normal and not wd.
Hello ironhead70 and Grantmetheseren,

There are times that hope alone won't solve our problems.Hope,without effort,rarely returns results.

I think back now and I can't even count on my fingers(for there were none) the amount of times that I loved the feeling of drugs.
It made me paranoid,more talkative and left me wanting more and more.
Know that the euphoria only exists because the drug is entering the bloodstream.Once there,the entire body feels a certain way.
That euphoric feeling you speak of,is just an illusion,which is meant to take you away from your current concerns and make the drug appear to be your only priority.
Realize it's a feeling meant to distract,more than please.It only "pleases" the senses for a few moments and that's all it takes....buy,buy(pun intended) troubles and worries.......momentarily.
You'll come down and want to chase that escaping feeling once again and you never quite get there....next thing you know,your money's spent,the children are sad and your relationship(if you're in one) has been severely compromised,if at all salvageable.

I may not have done it all but i've done(cocaine and crack),heard(from reliable sources,who provided convincing evidence) and witnessed(through personal experience and observation) enough sorrow and misery to overflow the deepest abyss.....many times over.
Please take time;even a little here,to take a look at what i'm saying and it may one day(and hopefully soon) make a believer out of you.

Painstakingly stated,
Phoenix
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Last edited by Phoenix; 09-06-2012 at 10:36 PM.

 
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heroin withdraws, opiate withdrawals



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