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Old 01-23-2002, 05:35 PM   #1
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HumbleMan10248 HB User
Post HEROIN

I started using heroin in summer of 1998, I started using and was first introduced to Heroin through a good and at the time close friend of mine you see I was and am the kind person who wouldn't mind experimenting with drugs even if its jus once! but by the ALmighty
i made the gravest mistake of my life that day when i first used Heroin even now the regret of that day overwhelms me...

The feeling I felt on the first few uses of Heroin is unexplainable the rush the satisfaction it gave me is like falling in love with the woman of your dreams BUT if only i knew..and it was after that only one use of Heroin that i become an addict..

Then started the long winding road to utter self-destruction....You see let em tell you just little bit about myself i am 28 couple years before getting addicted to Heroin i just graduated and after landing my first job worked my way up into a TOp job....and I was in my prime in terms of my career when Heroin ws introduced to me and then
God knows the destructive path that took place...I started using heroin daily ...every single penny i earned from this so called top job went straight into my consumption of Heroin..
in total i have spent 50 thousand dollars on this drug in the last three years...but ok money is money easy come easy go to me but what the self destruciotn and the way heroin was destroying my mind body and soul is what hurt me so much there were days i used to walk into work strung out on heroin people use to not notice that i was on drugs because i hid oh so well as all addicts do...i was even just about getting away with my work too i mean at the beginning I was get praised by my boss all the time for my performance at work but after a couple of years of addiction you know when i used to wake up in the morning to drive to work but my brain has not woken up im still stoned in my head from the previous nights usage and the very dangerously i drive to work in that condition oh Lord i dont know how i did it and did not crash and die...also the withdrawals i sued to feel at work then i used to start throwing up at work being sick all the times so much so that i started using heroin in the toilets at work!!!!! hmm hmm please think about this me an executive in a top job doing Heroin in the toilets!!!!!!!

finally my body started to give up on me I was always sick off work then i finally got the sack i was fired for not being in at work ha ha how the Mighty had Fallen eh?
but i was never mighty I am humble...but FALLEN oh yes that I was......and in my utter desperation only crying to God to help me was the only thing left for me to do.

So that brings me to now ....after being in rehab couple fo times I am now in a few weeks of recovery its still early days I know but oh God willing and i beg God to forgive me for my mistakes i will never return to that life which now is like a bad bad memory in my mind.

Kicking Heroin is very hard but i had methadone to help me with the physical addiction and people please believe me methadone works wonders and i support its usage whole haearteldy....cos i have also cold turkeyed off heroin and beleiveme its like HELL on earth
I remember when i did cold turkey oh Lord the first few days are pure hell I could not sleep for five days I could not eat for two three days I was vomiting every few hours I had pains all over my body i ws sweating from head to toe its like the flu ? no 1000 times worse...

but the mental addiction is so hard at times as it is ***** trying to lure me back into addiction the way i beat that is by praying to God and by being strong and determined that is the only way the only way...

For any youngster who is even remotely thinking of trying Heroin for the first time I beg you i know you dont know who I am and have never met me before but I am yes begging you whoever you are from one Human being to another I beg you please dont touch Heroin EVER! it will surely destroy you theres no final destination except death with this drug
please please keep well away from it well away.....dont make the same mistake I made
dont let three-four years of your life just go up in smoke....

To any recovering addicts or addicts wanting to stop i say this to you NEVER GIVE UP...
cos i have falterd and even fallen at times but I have never given up...

Humble Man

------------------
"So complicated it is to escape fate that you can never understand what im going through till we trade places...." - 2pac shakur
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"So complicated it is to escape fate that you can never understand what im going through till we trade places...." - 2pac shakur

 
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Old 01-23-2002, 06:41 PM   #2
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Christine HB User
Post

Your story is a sad but familiar one. Losing 3 or 4 years of your life is lucky compared to the lifetime of loss I see some addicts suffer.

I hope you have reached your bottom - for your sake. But remember, every bottom has a trap door - my advice to you in this oh-so-fragile early days of recovery is to get involved in a support group - there are sosososo many people out there who have life the same sad story. Talk to them - listen to what they do to stay sober - you have been in rehab a couple of times, you said, so you know the hell of relapse. If you want your life back and to escape the clutches of the "mental" addiction, try NA or AA - the support is unbelievable.

Good luck to you - hang in there, the trip to sobriety is so worth it.

 
Old 01-23-2002, 06:51 PM   #3
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HumbleMan10248 HB User
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lol hehehe thanks christine i was just giggling to myself cos i just left you a message of support and advice (as if i know lol) in reply to your mesage of
feelings...and pretty scared just 5 mins ago hmmmmm
and you have just left a reply to my message ...

i hear what u say though but to be honest with you im at the moment going through the mindset of that i can never get clean cos ive relapsed twice already but you are a perfect example that gives me hope....

what do u think?

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"So complicated it is to escape fate that you can never understand what im going through till we trade places...." - 2pac shakur
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"So complicated it is to escape fate that you can never understand what im going through till we trade places...." - 2pac shakur

 
Old 01-24-2002, 07:39 AM   #4
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Claudius HB User
Post

Quote:
Originally posted by HumbleMan10248:

To any recovering addicts or addicts wanting to stop i say this to you NEVER GIVE UP...
cos i have falterd and even fallen at times but I have never given up...
Humbleman,

Your post was great. Especially that end quote. You made my day

And Humbleman, you answered the question of your mindset yourself – read your words again.

I wish you all the best and I if could enlighten you as to the how’s (I would be a very rich man) I would, but I can’t. Why? Because, despite every addict being essentially the same, each one is unique. Your job is to find your own way through the maze. Will you find it? See your quote again.

Claudius

 
Old 02-05-2002, 08:58 PM   #5
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HumbleMan10248 HB User
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Claudius my freind sorry for the delay in getting back to you ...all i have to say is that your the man you answer is spot on ...you made me look at my inner self to answer teh questions i was asking thanks again man
and keep me in your prayers...

oh yes the end quote is a great quote made by a great man..

Humble

------------------
"So complicated it is to escape fate that you can never understand what im going through till we trade places...." - 2pac shakur
__________________
"So complicated it is to escape fate that you can never understand what im going through till we trade places...." - 2pac shakur

 
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