Ok. A year go I was diagnosed with Depression and ADD. I'm not in saying I don't, I know something is wrong and with my background my best friend says its understand able. I was sexually assaulted when I was 5 and my mom up and moved state when I was 14. I had trouble figuring out my sexuality, but that part is all sorted.
I was reading alot on this site and I was reading the symptoms for an Anxiety disorder and I noticed that i had a lot of them and my best friend even thinks I have one due to her dad having one. And the more I think about it the more I think I may have one, but I don't know if its just part of the depression.
Even as a little kid I tended to worry about little things than most kids my age. I've always been told I act more adult than my classmates (I'm a teenager). School wasn't that big of a think for me to get worried about though. I kept my grades decent and over compensated in classes that I enjoy like English, the sciences and choir.
I don't tend to worry about my health, but others. I take care of myself yes, but I tend to stress myself out with other people's problems. One time I had spilled liquid make-up all over my math text book and I ended up curled up in a corner rocking myself, freaking out about it. I managed to pull myself together after an hour and cleaned the text book.
I'm also very hesitant on meeting new people. I don't like physical contact with new people and I'm scared of being hurt until I tend to know them better. Men normally are the people I tend to have the hardest time to warm up to. Even at school, even though I put on a brave face, I scared of boys in the hall when they are throwing stuff and I'm the only one in my group of friends that shrinks away and stays out of their way.
I have no clue if its just my past and depression or if it has grown into something more serious.. please help...
(Could it also be PTSD?)
__________________ If everyone cared. If nobody cried...then I wouldn't be on my knees begging for help.
Wow, you sound exactly like me. Anxiety is very personality driven. There is a certain "type" of person who gets it. This type of person is very smart, has a big imagination, tends to overthink everything, worries and uses "what if?" statements a lot, has somewhat low self esteem and is usually a bit socially awkward or shy. A lot of people thing that some of these things are a result of the anxiety disorder, but they are actually the cause. A lifetime of these personality traits and behavioral tendencies teaches our brains that our world isn't safe, so therefore it is constantly pumping out adrenaline to keep us safe. Our brains are perfectly normal and only doing what they are supposed to do. Most people blame their brains and think something is wrong with their brains, when our brains should actually be given a medal for putting up with all of our crap our entire life.....lol.
So its not really a bad thing that I act the way I do? It's just my brain telling me what is normal? That confuses me cause my doctor said my depression is basically how my brain tries to maintains normal for me, but its a chemical inbalance and I'm on meds for it... wouldn't that by default mean that even if its normal for me and it not for really normal for everyone else that something is wrong so I would be put, should be put on meds for it as well.
I only ask because my friends say it its a lot like PTSD but I'm hoping that its just an anxiety disorder and not something that is as bad as PTSD. I have a lot of the symptoms for both, but they over lap so much that it is hard to tell one for the other. Like depression is a effect of PTSD, but it can also stand alone. It is just overly confusing. What do you think caused the cause of my behavior then if its not PTSD?
__________________ If everyone cared. If nobody cried...then I wouldn't be on my knees begging for help.
