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Old 04-10-2011, 09:59 PM   #1
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Impasse with Aging Father

My 85 year-old father lives 800 miles away, and refuses to move to be with us, his family. He is alone and suffers greatly with loneliness. I cannot move as I, like so many, are on the edge financially and moving would mean my job loss. It would be financial disaster for my family and all for whom I am responsible. My father's memory is fair, health fair, but his driving has [I]always[I] been maniacal. He is beyond stubborn and always has been. He is also an ex-cop and still thinks like one. He will not accept any suggestion I present to him, i.e. live-in companion, visiting angel, retirement residence. He has the money to make any of these changes if he makes a decision, which he will not. The old answers of "...you just have to insist" are futile with him, in fact he becomes very angry and we end up in an argument. No siblings are willing to help, so I am stuck. He will only listen to an authority figure, like his doctor, another cop, or the like.
Question: is it within the practice of a doctor to make "strong" recommendations relative to a patient's quality of life, such as driving, living arrangements, independence, caregivers, etc? I'm getting to the point where I feel he may have to be forced by an authority figure to make a change.
Any input is greatly appreciated -- I'm am really up a creek. Thank you.

 
Old 04-11-2011, 04:46 AM   #2
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Re: Impasse with Aging Father

Yes, his doctor can make these recommendations. And check with the authorities where he lives to see how to get him in for a driving test. Some localities allow doctors to recommend no driving or retesting.

 
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