no, it's not marvelous to look younger, not when you're 21 and looks like 12. If I were 30 and looked like 21, ok, it would be nice.
Then people say I must be patient and one day I'll be really gratefull for this. But I can't see that coming. People don't realize that you DON'T grow up forever. Now that I'm 21, my hands will stay SMALL, my height will be 5'6" forever and my beard will never close completely. That SUCKS!
I'd give anything to be like boys around my age. And I'm really tired of them saying they wanted to "never age" like me, the difference is that they want to stay how they are right now, and not like how I am.
So, maybe 10 years from now I'll look like 21, but I doubt it. Probably, I'll still be like 12, the only difference will be the wrinkles on my face and my ugly and flacid hands. People will think I have that child aging decease or something like that 30 years old boy that makes funny videos. How great is that?
Last edited by Administrator; 10-11-2011 at 12:21 AM.
This will probably fall on deaf ears because you seem blinded by your youthful appearance. Read a few of the tragic stories on this health board, the relatively young people facing an early death and then tell me about your beard not growing all the way in as the biggest problem one has to cope with.
I mean no disrespect but sometimes we lose sight and need to stand back and begin again. Take another look at life from the point of view that you are healty, young, bright, and "free", and can make your life hell or heaven depending on one thing, your attitude.
Being youthful looking may have drawbacks, but seriously consider the alternative. As long as you "behave" in a mature way, very quickly your younger looks will not be noticed by those who care about you or for whom you care. Unfortunately, most likely, you won't understand or appreciate what I am saying for many years. Good luck
Last edited by mod85; 10-12-2011 at 10:05 AM.
The Following User Says Thank You to RBK1111 For This Useful Post: Alex160 (10-12-2011)
Actually, this is not the only issue I have been dealing with. In fact, I've been dealing with clinical depression (dysthymia) for 6 years and taking medication. I became fat and then came back to being skinny again, and my body is now filled with stretch marks. It's not because I complained about something that everything else (health or not) is fine with me.
My post was only meant to get things out of my chest, because I'm tired of people treating me like a kid when they just met me, then being surprised with my real age, then giving me that look and trying to "comfort" me with kind words like "hey! look at the bright side, you'll never look old!" when I didn't even say anything but my age, and then gossiping in front of me.
Things like this makes me regretful of trying to socialize again.
I got fed up by that, as you probably noticed by the way I wrote that post.
But anyway. I appreciate your words, I know you just wanted to help. Thank you for that.
Last edited by Alex160; 10-12-2011 at 11:14 AM.
Reason: i've mistaken a few words. bad english.
Most people would love to have your problem. Think we spend the first half trying to look older and then some of us spend the next half trying to look younger!And some of us just have good genes and stay out of the sun.
Alex, a lot depends on how you act also. You just have to learn to ignore people who make remarks about how young you look when you didn't ask them. Just say Thank you and change the subject quickly instead of defending your your young looks. the less you bring attention to your looks and age the less people will talk. Like the beard, if someone asks why are you growing a beard, you shouldn't start talking about because you look young. Just say I wanted to see what it looked like and again change the subject.Soon enough you will be enjoying your young look.. Best to you.
"Depression" is complicated . Its causes can be many but usually are internal (chemical imbalance) or external (social situations). Regardless, often the feeling is like falling into a river where all the "bad" stuff overwhelms while being happy is more or less being on the top of a mountain enjoying an "isolated" event. It can be overwhelming. Make sure you have a rough idea of causation to be able to "target" your responses.
As I said, "attitude" is a major part of the solution to your problem. It may be a small thing, but change it and you change the world. For example, you see something one day and it is of no consequence and see it another day and it of concern. The "thing" has not changed, your attitude changed and with it your perception and feelings.
People do NOT know what you are thinking. They respond to your behavior. You can be anything you want.
Your problems are real to you, whether others understand them or not but don't exaggerate them. The best way to make a mountain out of a mole hill is to keep pouring sand on it.
Say to yourself , I am going to live my life!!! I think you will find people responding positively. Physical appearance is the first thing we see, not the last.
Hey Alex. Here's the skinny. No one, other than the other people who appear younger than they are, knows how you are feeling. They will never get it because most people want what they don't have. It's like the really thin person complaining about how they gained 5 LBS, or the blue eyed person wanting brown eyes (or vice versa) or the curly haired wanting straight hair (and vice versa). People will always look at these 'complainers' like they have 5 heads!!!! So don't get offended when people don't understand where you're coming from! If you want people to agree with your sentiments, you're going to have to surround yourself with people who are in the same situation, OR you're going to have to get over it. I'm a female who looks about 10 years younger than my actual age. People can never guess my age. People initially treat me the way I look until I correct them. I've had people ask me if I have that "Webster's disease" (Webster was a 80s sitcom) since I appeared so young. So trust me, I know how infuriating it is. I don't care about looking like I'm 20 when I'm 40. When I'm 40, I'll still be 40 and will have had live 40 years. Imagine a 40 year old adult acting like a 20 year old. Not really that sexy when you put it like that, huh?
But here's what I won't do. I will not let it get to me! I already know I will always get carded, I already know I will get asked if my parents are home when sales people knock on the door, I already know that when I have a baby, people will think I'm a teenage mom, I already know that my older than me boyfriend may get weird looks for being with a minor, I will always shop in the petite section (ok, maybe children sections sometimes ). But that's my life. At the end of the day, I am NOT a child. And neither are you.
The following user gives a hug of support to curly fry: Alex160 (01-19-2012)
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to curly fry For This Useful Post: Alex160 (01-19-2012), boobooluc (01-21-2012)
Hey, thanks! And sorry for taking too long to reply!
Your message really made me feel a LOT better!
Yesterday someone said "I thought you were 17yo", waaay better than looking 12, like almost everyone says.
I'm still trying to live with it, specially now that I'm in college and have to endure 18yo kids treating me bad. But I'll get through it. I hope...
I also let this get to me all the time. I Never really bothered me until i turned 21. I am 23 now but the oldest people automatically take me for is 16. It didnt start making me feel bad until i started hearing alot of " you look like a little kid" or "you dont look 23 at all you look like your in highschool still" . I Know that we are lucky because clearly we have aged much better cuz who wants to look older then they are right? that kinds totally sucks being 18 and someone thinking your 25. ouch imagine what they are going to think when those people are actually 25. But at the same time in a small way it makes me feel bad about myself and it gets frusturating because it seems like the way people are saying it is like its my own fault and theres somthing i can do to make myself look older. I'v realized that most of the people who comment on how young they look are just jealous, just think, at least we dont have to worry about anti aging cream. lol
I've been there too. I remember being 21 and people kept asking me my age and then they would look shocked and tell me they thought I was 16. It used to irritate me but by the time I was in my mid 20's it just never came up and wasn't an issue anymore.
"I don't care about looking like I'm 20 when I'm 40. When I'm 40, I'll still be 40 and will have had live 40 years. Imagine a 40 year old adult acting like a 20 year old. Not really that sexy when you put it like that, huh?"
curlyfry you'll be surprised how good it feels to look younger than your age at 40. That's around the time most people start to lose their youthful looks and you do look in the mirror and think "who is this person looking back at me" and you are hit with the reality that you are over your prime. So when someone tells you look like you're 32 you don't feel so old anymore. Trust me, when you're in your early 20s you think 40 is so far away, but it happens in the blink of an eye, it's almost scary how quickly happens but the bonus is, by that time you have done so much and learned so much in your life, that you're much more self assured and you don't even care what other people think of you. What you lose in looks you make for in confidence.
If it's any help, my husband was 5'8" and weighed 120 when he was 20. Today he is 6'2" and weighs a lot more. Maybe you will still grow yet. And I am 43 but have the skeleton of a 90 year old. I have had 4 surgeries in the last 2 years and have more to come. That really sucks but there's nothing I can do about it.
We are what we are and nothing more and nothing less.
Hi Alex. It looks like you have connected with some people with similar situations here. That's great to know that you are not alone. Fortunately or unfortunately, we all grow older...some of us look much older as we age and others don't. Our genes play a major role in that. In the meantime, strive for a more confident and self-assured attitude. If you present yourself as a confident, outgoing person, people will take more notice of your personality than your stature or age. Make sure you dress just a bit older than your peers for a more mature look. Now that you're in college find clubs and activities that interest you and you'll find new friends with similar interests. Step out of your comfort zone, be friendly and look confident while you are trying new things and meeting new people. I think you'll be pleased with yourself and the results.
Oh, by the way. When my husband and I first met in college....he was barely 5'6'', had a small build and was very neardy looking. Not my type at all. I was 5'9" and felt like I towered over him. But we connected when I joined an organization he was a member of....we're married 31 years! Best of luck to you in school.
To be honest in my opinion this is something to be happy about. I can tell you from my personally experience that currently i am 27 and people think I am 18-19. It's due to my diet but still that's besides the point. We are not going to look like this forever so enjoy it while you can.
Im in the same boat as you, im 18 but I look like im 14 or 12. Either way, I try not to let it bring me down, I have a baby face, with some mad dimples, ladies like it My girlfriend is 19 and she doesnt seem to mind, I work construction and they poke fun about it but it doesnt bother me(they warm up to you eventually), just be yourself and let no one bring you down. I'm about 5'8 or 5'9 and like I said I work construction. Just because you look young doesnt mean you cant do things people our age or older can do.
I always looked younger until I got about 25...and then it started to catch up. I looked about 16 up that age. I spent too much time in the sun and smoked/partied so I got some wrinles under by eyes by like 28..im turning 30 next week and most people think I look just about 26-31. So it is just about right I guess..wish I would have taken better care of my skin.
You should be thankful for having a younger face. Take this as an advantage, many people want to be young and do anything to look young and here you go ranting for your younger look? Don't bother about your look you can still do the things that you need to do without worrying about anything. Just act according to your age and you will not encounter any problem at all.