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Old 11-21-2007, 11:35 AM   #1
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allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

My daughter has allergies that are exacerbated by cigarettes smoke. There is absolutely no smoking in our home, but my husband's parents smoke in their home, ,and have been for 20+ years. My husband says that as long as they don't smoke while our daughter is there, then there shouldn't be a problem with her allergies (even though they already don't smoke when I let her go, she still gets all the sneezing, runny nose, coughing, (lowere respiratory/bronchial) symptoms. Can you tell me if she needs to see an allergist for this issue, or are they just in complete denial that they are causing extreme harm to my daughter, and my relationship with my husband, because he claims to be stuck in the middle? I don't think she needs to see an allergist, as she is not allergic to the smoke, it only makes her allergies AWFULLY WORSE! I have spoken to them several times, and wrote a letter to my mother in law, yet the continue to claim their smoking does not affect my chiolds illness. How to you explain facts and common sense to people of this nature?

 
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Old 11-21-2007, 04:18 PM   #2
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

You should definitely take your daughter to see an allergist. Second guessing does no good.

My husband and I visited our son in New Mexico while there were forest fires filling the air with smoke (we were a long ways from the fire). We thought we came down with the flu. When we were a good ways from the area on our way home we both cleared up like nothing had ever been wrong.

Yes, your daughter could be allergic to second hand smoke. The walls, clothes, etc. are soaked with smoke.

Your doctor and an allergist are the only ones that can solve this problem for you.

Do not jeopardize your marriage or relationship with your in-laws on assumptions, see an allergist and find out for sure. Take your husband with you when you take your daughter to see an allergist and let him hear first hand what the doctor has to say.

Mommies are good at rewording what the doctor says to make it fit what we want. I am a mommy of 5 and I admit I have been guilty of this myself. At least give your husband a chance to hear first hand.

Last edited by Misty800; 11-21-2007 at 04:21 PM.

 
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Old 11-21-2007, 05:09 PM   #3
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

And it may be all she needs is an antihistamine and she'd be fine around them. Take her to an allergist and get the straight story on her problems and then address those.

 
Old 11-23-2007, 01:05 PM   #4
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

She has been on Zyrtec for 2 years. I think it is an antihistamine. Sheis going to the doctor next week, and I am going to request that he refer her to an allergist. with her new insurance, she has to have a referral to see any specialist, but keep your fingers crossed that she's not allergic to her nana and gramps house, and if she is, pray for a cure :-) I just learned frfrom my sis-in-law yesterday, that they have mold in their house (which i was unaware of) if I knew that , the entire family could have been spared grief! well, me anyway. They don't like me because i told my mom in law she didn't love her granddaughter the way a grandmother should sincec she wouldn't quit smoking and refused to visit her in our clean, mold and smoke free home. I was blessed as an honest person

 
Old 11-23-2007, 09:17 PM   #5
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

Zyrtec is an antihistamine. I'm surprised that after 2 years on it and no results that you haven't asked for something else. There is no point in medicating if it isn't working - and this one obviously isn't for her. Find a good pediatric allergist and take her ASAP. There is no point in making her suffer when it might be controlled with proper medication.

And as a reformed smoker, I can tell you it takes more to kick the habit than you realize. And as tough as quiting was, getting off caffeine was even worse. I sympathize with anyone trying to kick an addiction to either.

 
Old 11-27-2007, 02:03 PM   #6
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

it helps with the pollen, and mold, and other allergy "stuff" i've never had to deal with allergies before so I don't know. But, im asking her PCP next wednesday! Its nice to think that a little one would help break an addiction, though! Its literally only that one house. we go in non-smoking sections of resaurants, and shes fine. But, I am taking your advice. Congrats on quitting, too!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou View Post
Zyrtec is an antihistamine. I'm surprised that after 2 years on it and no results that you haven't asked for something else. There is no point in medicating if it isn't working - and this one obviously isn't for her. Find a good pediatric allergist and take her ASAP. There is no point in making her suffer when it might be controlled with proper medication.

And as a reformed smoker, I can tell you it takes more to kick the habit than you realize. And as tough as quiting was, getting off caffeine was even worse. I sympathize with anyone trying to kick an addiction to either.

 
Old 11-28-2007, 11:37 AM   #7
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

Kelly, I saw this and just had to reply! I am in a similar situation with my inlaws. My little boy is 5 and he's highly allergic to cats. They know this and have known it for years BUT decided they just had to get a cat. Now the twist-My son has also had horrible reactions to antihistamines (allergy meds)-
Well my mil and sil have decided that "it can't be that bad" and my husband and I must be exagerating (I'm sure I spelled that wrong) and even after 2 weeks of discussing this on and off and saying that he could not sleep over anymore and maybe not even vist which of course he loves to do, they went and got a cat anyway. This has now escalated out of control to the point that my husband told his mother this morning that he just couldn't believe how inconsiderate they were and we would no longer be visiting.
The situation is that my sil and her 3 kids just moved in with my mil with a divorce pending.....For the third time. Last time she got a dog and when she went back to her husband she left it there-got 2 more dogs and got rid of them too. She has taken over the house which is way too small to accomodate all of them anyway and she (sil) is the one who got the cat.
I am taking my son to an allergist as well because obviously they need to see this in black and white but also because I would like to find a way to deal with his allergy since he may have others also that we just don't know of yet.
He did get tested when he was 2 but that wasn't good enough for them and I have a feeling this time won't be either but it's not really for them anyway.
Also they invited him to sleep over last week and hid the fact that they had a cat in the house from us! They needed to see for themselves. When I found out the next day I was needless to say-really angry.

Last edited by kdel; 11-28-2007 at 11:39 AM. Reason: add somthing

 
Old 11-29-2007, 12:19 PM   #8
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

i am so glad (well not for you) but that someone is in the same situation as I am. I am glad that your husband has the guts to stand up to his parents; mine whines about being in the middle. i am glad that i am not the only one with extremely selfish in-laws? why don't they just get it? it is the most frustrating situation i have ever been in, because i am a kind, warm hearted person, and am learning more and more that the family i married into is comepletely opposite. i hope your situation works out for the best. why can't they keep their pets outside? my best freinds daughter is allergic to cats, and so when we got a new kitten, i told her i was keeping it outside, just for kaylynn! we shouldn't have to feel guilty for our childrens allergies, but that is how manipulative my in laws are, and yours don't sound much better! i was relived to see your response today! thank you for understanding!

 
Old 11-29-2007, 08:31 PM   #9
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

If it makes you feel any better, we never go to my moms house because my son has asthma and smoke is the worst for that. I just tell her that there's no way we can even go in, even if she's not smoking, smoke does stay everywhere. Sorry to hear about your situation, it's especially hard with the in-laws...but it's for her health and you have to stand up for that. Good luck!

 
Old 11-30-2007, 04:04 AM   #10
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

Hello again, Glad I could make you feel better, unfortunatley our kids are still suffering but it was really nice to come on here and see some people in similar situations that feel the same way I do. I have since spoken to my mil and it didn't go well. After about 10 years of never raising my voice to her-well, she sure got an earful! She can't even seem to understand how Upset I am about the fact that they hid the stupid cat from me in order to see for themselves what would happen. She feels this is no big deal. I asked her what if any plan did she have if he had a severe reaction? Was she going to call me? She said oh c'mon, I have allergy medicine in the house. DUH, He can't take it, remember? She said oh he would have been fine, everyone else can take it! So for the 100th time, I told her AGAIN that he CANNOT take it. and that in an emergency I would give him some benadryl BUT not the full dose for his weight which is 1 1/2 teaspoons. I was told to give him only 3/4 of a teaspoon and then get him medical attention. She thinks this is "silly"!
By the way we have had this discussion in the past so she should have known but she forgot about the dosage and would have given him the whole thing. Just the 3/4 sends his heart racing but I can't make her understand that and just the thought that she would have given it to him and then put him to bed scares the Heck out of me. She wouldn't even have known what was happening to him.
After all of this she is mad at me for the way I spoke to her! Geez, that's the issue?
Also about the air purifiers, she has those all over the house and he still had a reaction.

 
Old 11-30-2007, 03:18 PM   #11
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

Kdel, OMG! I realized upon reading this that my MIL took in a stray cat (although it stays outside) even though my child is allergic and has asthma. She twists things so we can't go outside when we are there and if anyone goes outside she "disinfects" them so my son doesn't have a reaction (much more considerate than yours), but I was still upset that she knowingly got the animal because now we can't play outside when we visit. And my son LOVES being outside. Her husband didn't want the cat to begin with which is part of the reason she disinfects everyone who's been out there...because if my son has a reaction, her husband will make the cat go! Anyway, sorry about your situation, such a bummer!!!

 
Old 12-02-2007, 04:14 AM   #12
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

Hey dizzymommy, It stinks doesn't it? Do they just not understand how hazardous this can be? Your child has asthmas and cat allergies? I think it is so inconsiderate of them to do this to our children. If your child has asthma the cat will make this worse. The cat NEVER comes inside? I ask because the dander from a cat is really difficult to get rid of and it gets everywhere!
Anyone that has been with the cat is a danger to your child. You said she disinfects everyone, how does she do that?

 
Old 12-02-2007, 08:27 AM   #13
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Re: allergies, my 3 year old and second hand smoke

Quote:
Originally Posted by kelly80zoe04 View Post
My daughter has allergies that are exacerbated by cigarettes smoke. There is absolutely no smoking in our home, but my husband's parents smoke in their home, ,and have been for 20+ years. My husband says that as long as they don't smoke while our daughter is there, then there shouldn't be a problem with her allergies (even though they already don't smoke when I let her go, she still gets all the sneezing, runny nose, coughing, (lowere respiratory/bronchial) symptoms. Can you tell me if she needs to see an allergist for this issue, or are they just in complete denial that they are causing extreme harm to my daughter, and my relationship with my husband, because he claims to be stuck in the middle? I don't think she needs to see an allergist, as she is not allergic to the smoke, it only makes her allergies AWFULLY WORSE! I have spoken to them several times, and wrote a letter to my mother in law, yet the continue to claim their smoking does not affect my chiolds illness. How to you explain facts and common sense to people of this nature?
My son and husband and I all suffer from smoke irritation and yes allergy. It is common for sufferers of vasomotor rhinitis. Vasomotor rhinitis is an asthma or allergic response to environmental irritants or pollution. Second hand smoke and entering smoked in environments can and does make a difference and will trigger asthmatic responses in VR suffers.

My grandmother smokes and we now try and just pick her up and take her out of her home and visit other locations. We can not enter her home and visit it causes us to get sick every time. However the smoke has permiated her clothes and skin and just hugging her can cause irritation to our systems. We also react to the wood burning fireplaces of my parents and my husbands parents. They understand and thoroughly clean their fireplaces and use central heat a bit before we come for clod weather visits to help with matters.

There is no guaranteed cure, but application of zyrtec and nasonex as well as using Ponaris right before visiting does lesson the effects. There is no means to decrease sensitivity to the smoke.. no allergy shots and the like... the best you can do is treat the pollution/irritation based allergy with antihisatamines, a nasal cortiroid spray like Nasonex and insulate the nasal membranes with the Nasal oil Ponaris. Ponaris is OTC and often you need to get the pharmacist to order it. My ENT suggested it last October and it has made a huge difference. Visiting the allergist can give you relief through medication and will also identify any other allergies that may be an aggravant. Good luck in managing your families allergies.

Sincerely,
MG
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Last edited by mkgbrook; 12-02-2007 at 08:32 AM.

 
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