I could have sworn that I responded to this post earlier.
Anyhow, dealing with peanut allergies is very difficult. My son was diagnosed at 12 months after eating a french fry cooked in peanut oil.

It is an uphill battle dealing with this allergy. Many people do not understand the severity of it and how easily it is for cross contamination to occur.
I have had to pull my son out of public school due to reacting from sitting in the lunch room near his peers who have eating peanut butter. The rag that they used to wipe the tables simply wipes up peanut butter crumbs from one table and smears it on another. All he has to do is sit at the table and oil remanants thru him into analyphaltic shock.
Anytime you eat out, it is a risk. Personally, I don't rely on waiters. I ask to speak to managers and explain to them the severity of my sons illness. I explain that his oil must be separate from others due to cross contamination. Thankfully the managers seem to realize or understand the significance of our situation and things have worked out great.
Many times online you can find the ingredients lists for restaurants but they don't always keep it updated with changes. We have run into that with eggs. Unfortunately we are allergic to this as well.
When we went to the theme parks in FLA, they were awesome. They have chefs that actually run around the park and go from restaurant to restaurant who cook specifically for those who are dealing with allergies. We had chefs open new gallons of ice cream just for him. Awesome. Great place to go.
Hopefully this post has helped you but you really have to be your own advocate, make sure you wear that medic id bracelet, make sure that your friends and family know what to do in an emergency and where to find your epipen on you not in your car or at home, etc.
Good luck.