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Old 12-30-2003, 01:20 PM   #1
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sweet&sour HB User
Unhappy Need some opinions please

Here's my story sorry it's so long....

A very good and dear close frined of the family (like an uncle to me), has been deteriorating over the last year or so. He threw his back out years ago and has been on meds ever since. He lives in an apartment for the elderly on his own and has been doing so for many years. He has no family it's really sad so my family is all he's every known. He was always there for me growing up - I could call him at anytime and he would come pick me up from anywhere, he always cared for me and my sister when my parents had to go somewhere. He would never hurt a fly he has such a big heart but he's always been on his own never married nor any of his own children. Now he sits in a hospital room totally confused not knowing what's going on. See he was still driving his car (should not be driving) and was on his way to a mall to get our family some Christmas presents when he hit a post and a car in the parking lot and was taken to the hospital. Poor thing was putting up such a big fuss on Christmas Eve because he didn't understand why he was in the hospital and not at our family's home as we open our gifts that night. He had to be restrained and it broke my heart when the hospital called 2 times asking for us to come to see him but we couldn't because we were expecting other family but I did talk to him on the phone in tears I told him to be strong and that we all love him and would visit the next day. The hospital is trying to figure out what is wrong with him; they think he had a stroke and his blood pressure is very high and I know for a fact he has a touch of dementia (early stages). My family does not want to deal with everything and nobody has enough money (we are all going through tough times). We are doing the best we can but we are not his caregivers and he has not given anyone power of attorney. What can I do? Are there any options here? I'm so upset by all this and the lack of more support from my own family I can't sleep! I work full time and go to school part time and live on my own. How can I help? Has anyone out there had this happen with someone who's not your blood relative? Any advice would be really great thanks.

 
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Old 12-31-2003, 09:02 AM   #2
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Re: Need some opinions please

How can I help?

Guardianship....learn more about it and the process on the internet. Information is free.

they think he had a stroke and his blood pressure is very high and I know for a fact he has a touch of dementia (early stages)

Likely it's all inter-related. Dementia can result from stroke. Some of the same underlying causes for certain types of dementia can also precipitate stroke.

Tell us what you know of his financial and medical situation. Insurance beyond Medicare, assets, liabilities, etc. If he's in an independent living facility or AL, he's got assets. They'll be important for his future care, if he cannot return to his current arrangment.

Just do your best and remember him for the great guy he is/was. Let us know if we can help further.

Pat

 
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