What's happening so far? - Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

angel_bear · 03-21-2005, 12:27 AM

Not alot.

FIL is perservereing staying at home .. even though he SHOULD probably be in hospital ...

He's bucking the showers, until I told him this morning, "If your not well enough for a shower today, you need to be in hospital"

T'is amazing .. he had a shower (with the aide). He hasn't had a shower in over a week (just a sponge - - not quite good enough in our heat)

MIL ........ ahhh now ..a break through .. BIL took her in hand, and got the webster pack organised today ......... this thing she's been BUCKING for AGES, finally saw it and said "oh great, easy easy" ..

**rolling eyes**

The theory on FIL is he probably knows his next admission will quite probably be his last (Oh Lord, please hear our prayer) .. as there is a team of people waiting in the wings to pounce on him .......

Other than that, things have been quiet on the home front (such a nice change .. lol) ..with MIL only having a few minor outbreaks that are controllable by ignoring her, nothing major. Then again, main daughter hasn't been home either .... she's taken to escaping to a friends house alot on the weekends ... don't blame her .. lol .. wish I could too ..

I think the general 'game play' for FIL is to wait until his next admission. When that happens (and he's hanging on stubbornly ..!!) the team will pounce on him with logistics and facts. BIL will pounce on him with reality and facts .........

Me? I might just run away .... LOL ...

so .. for the moment .. this is where we are at ......

Hugs

Sally

Martha H · 03-21-2005, 01:01 AM

Hang on, Sally things ARE moving even if it seems far too slowly.

Love yur children and let them know you do, and that a solution will be found. I don't know if you get the news from this country. We are all reeling after another horrible case of abduction and murder of a little girl in Florida. It just makes me think that while we have our kids and grandkids, we can't do enough to show them how much we love them ... as Barb says, they have a lifetime ahead of them and the older people's lives are ending.

We are all wiser when looking in the rear view mirror!

Just a little bit longer and you and your family wil be moving on to a new and better life, studies, jobs, the kids getting older and more independent (and having a room of their own) and finally they will all look back at this time as a painful episode that brought you all closer together. That is my hope and prayer for you.

Love,

Martha

BarbaraH · 03-21-2005, 10:23 AM

Hi Sally,

Sounds as if things the best they can be without the planned and coming fruit basket turnover. Relative calm is good.

On the other hand, FIL is in need of hospital and he's delaying the needed care so he doesn't have to face facts. Does that mean that you're again stuck with giving hospital care at home, but with an aide to do the showers (big help, that)??????? If so, then that won't do. Over rule FIL and send him packing.

What's the delay in MIL's Aged Care evaluation? It's unimportant if she leaves home first. She's a bit better for the moment, but at the cost of one child seeking refuge away from home. It's time for that appointment to be scheduled no matter who is miffed or angry. It's reasonable.

Does the family realize that your family cannot go places together because FIL and MIL cannot be left alone??? That's not reasonable and it's not what you signed on for.

Hope the wheels begin to turn faster for the betterment of all. You are an amazing woman!! Hug yourself - unless it would hurt your neck!

Blessings - Barbara