My father in law - Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

Patrick1972 · 08-16-2005, 01:42 PM

has what is believed to be Alzheimers. He suffered depression a few years after retirement and gradually went downhill. The doctors initially said dementia but the last two years have just seen him get worse.
Over time he's had good days and bad days. He firstly lost interest in most things. He didnt want to go out anymore. He then lost his appetite, lost his ability to use the toilet, was on occasions quite nasty towards his wife, wandered off for walks with £100's in his pockets.
He has suffered with a couple of chest infections. One of which recently left him in hospital. Hes still there two weeks later. He appeared to just stop talking or taking any notice of anyone around him which is when we realised there was something wrong (other than the problems we knew about). Although the antibiotics appear to have helped his infection he is still not eating and is now nil by mouth in the hospital. He is either sleeping lots or sitting staring into space. He just doesnt acknowledge ANYTHING.
Should we be looking at this as the final stage and preparing ourselves for the worst? Has he just given up?

Thanks for any advice.

BarbaraH · 08-16-2005, 02:42 PM

Hi Patrick,

Sorry your Dad has withdrawn to such an extent. If you haven't already done so, please read the sticky at the top of this thread about the stages of Alzheimer's. Most Alzhiemers patients follow that kind of decline, some spending longer at some level than others, and all going back and forth a little betwen stages while showing a relentless decline over all. If you see your father's behavior mirrored there, you'll have a clue about what to expect by reading the next stages.

There's nothing easy about losing a family member before they're actually gone. I lost my mother over the course of about 4 years. She did seem to lose information in reverse order from how she learned it. She forgot how to work household appliances and thought they were broken and carried thousands of dollars in her purse. In her thoughts I became too old to be her daughter, then the man in the picture wasn't my Dad because he was too old, then she worried her mother didn't know where she was and that she'd be late for school. She then would forget what she wanted to say after speaking just a word or two. Then she quit starting any conversation, but would briefly reply. Toward the end she was almost silent except she could always say, "That's nice", "That feels good", and "I love you, too".

You're not alone on this most unwelcome road. I wish you well as you look for answers for your father. Come talk with us any time.

Barbara