Bizarre Behaviour !?!?!? - Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

angel_bear · 08-16-2005, 03:46 PM

China BIL is in town ! Woo hoo!! Pity is, he's not staying here and seeing his mothers decline, so it's all going to be verbal from me. He's only going to see the nice'ish day behaviour IF THAT. He's staying with BIL and 'L', so you can bet your bottom dollar they've cleared themselves of all wrongdoing.

I am going to TRY (and I emphasise TRY) to be calm and patient when discussing MIL's health with China BIL. I will try and not get passionate about my worries for her, and I will try REALLY REALLY hard not to slam dunk 'L' for her stupid blunderings (oh ! Did I say that ? Tsk on me). It's going to be hard, I can already tell.

That being said, our Tuesday's seem to be the odd nights.

Found MIL downstairs, laying on the lounge with no pants on. Pointing the cordless phone to the air conditioner trying to turn it off, and yelling at it

Uh huh ... interesting ....

Came upstairs and reported to DH, then I went back down to keep an eye on her, only to find her standing on the arm of the lounge, hitting the air con with the phone now and telling it to freeze, to STOP, to NOW and C'mon come .... and then .. she toppled .... she slid across and down the wall, and fell on her back over her little side table and her lounge chair, and she couldn't get up at all .. I flew over to her the minute I saw her falling, but couldn't stop her. I had to physically lift her out of the chair myself, and for a little woman, she was a dead weight. She could hardly open her eyes, but she was quite agitated that the air con wouldn't turn off .. I pointed out she had the phone, and picked up the proper remote, and said "you had the phone" and she grabbed it off me and pointed it to the air con again and said "phone" ..

I told her it was time to go to bed, and she clung to me as I half carried her to her bed, undressed her, got her PJ's on and tucked her into bed. Then I locked up downstairs, and found she had pee'd all over the lounge, and had soiled a pair of trousers and underpants and had dumped them on the kitchen floor as well.

This is such a tragedy watching this once proud woman meltdown.

Now .. will anybody believe me or am I still making this up and exaggerating?

And to think, she could be safely in a home under respite care at the moment and this wouldn't have happened. Some people are just so stupid and selfish. (not pointing fingers)

Hugs all
Sally

BarbaraH · 08-16-2005, 06:04 PM

Hi Sally,

Goodness gracious! Hope MIL isn't broken from her fall. It's so sad that she's undressing more ofter and making such messes. It would break her heart so it's good she doesn't know.

Methinks you and Alan must talk to China BIL, bring him to the house for a day,all day. Let him see the food packets, his Mum's addled condition, and the mess. To have him brainwashed by the slugs is outrageous.

The sons MUST meet, discuss, and make decisions for now and for January when your lot is leaving. Plans for FIL and MIL that are reasonable and complete should be made. You get to be there as prime caretaker and witness. On the basis of time spent with MIL and FIL in the last year, you win, so you're the expert. You've got the credentials and the injuries. If they fail to act, MIL is the one who suffers.

May the needed miracles happen.

Many hugs - Barbara

WannaBeFreeToRoam · 08-16-2005, 06:23 PM

Hi Sally,

I totally agree with Barbara! There has to be some way you and your DH can get China BL to come for the day and possibly another time for the evening, or whatever can be worked out. He needs to be with his mother a lot! Is that not part of the reason he came?! He needs to see what she can and cannot do. I do know that most alzheimers patients act and do better in front of company. I have seen my dad do that. He does it for doctors too. So, he needs to stay most of a day to see all of his mother and how she is for real now.

Be sure and tell them about tonight/today. I hope she was not injured. I guess time will tell. They can usually make sounds so that you know they hurt somewhere. My dad knows when something hurts, but he does not know why or where sometimes.

Do the best you can (I know you already are!) and hope and strive for some help from the "others"!!! I know, I know. But we can wish for the impossible! :>

Take care of yourself. Wannabe

angel_bear · 08-17-2005, 02:00 AM

China BIL coming around after dinner tonight ... let's hope MIL is at her best? She's tired, had a big day with Day Care and charging around this afternoon getting FIL back to the nursing home (refused to get out of the car, quite happy to see him go LOL) ... fingers crossed I can talk some sense into HIM

Then again, he's the quiet achiever **sometimes**

Hugs
SAlly

LuvMyLilDoggie · 08-17-2005, 02:12 PM

I was hoping China BIL would stay with MIL but I see that was not to happen. Hopefully, there will be an incident that proves to China BIL that you've been right all along and that something HAS to be done NOW.

It's early morning for you so I'll keep an eye on this thread to see what happened.

School is almost ready to start here and I've been practicing picking up and dropping off students. I have a headache already! The routes they gave me are nearly impossible to accomplish, not in the time they want them done anyway.

I get to drive a little school bus with AC and am/fm cd player! YIPPEE!!!! I'll have little ones mostly, 3-5 year olds with special needs. Many of them are autistic.

Gotta go now. Busy with the two jobs this week.

Love, Barb