Choquis

Hi to everyone!

I can't tell you how much this board has helped me! It has brought back alot of the memories of the struggles I went thru with my mom, but it also has helped me deal with my FIL and his fall into dementia.

The advice of not being a "know-it-all" really helped. It's so hard to keep my mouth shut , but I do as usually family members that are the closest cannot bear to hear what is next on the dementia slide. And the "either, they get it, or don't!"....helps me keep the situation in perspective.

FIL has good periods...I can't say days as he is so changeable. He'll be in a rage for a few hours, then be calm as a kitten the next. Example: when doing some home maintenance for them, we smelled a gas leak! We tested it at the meter, and sure enough, there was a small leak. MIL called the gas company and they came out immediately.

FIL ranted and raved at the utility worker and had her in tears. He wasn't going to pay for any gas leak...(it was the utility company fault...we told him that, but still he yelled at the worker.) MIL took her aside and told her of the AD problem, but still she was shook up!

MIL told me that she spoke to the doctor and asked him face to face: "Does he have AD?" (The doctor has given him 2 prescriptions for AD meds since spring...what did she think he was giving them for? ) He said "Yes, he's in the 1st stages." But this is the first time she has actually asked him....so I thought it was a good sign of the beginning of acceptance!

FIL is in the 4th or 5th stage.... but just them talking about him having AD is a beginning!

In our state we have a form to fill out about driving recertification. It is anonymous. I was notified that the state received my request and will send him a notice...I've been very worried and nervous about this as if my name appears on the form....I'm dead meat! I didn't even tell my Hubby that I sent the form into the state.... Hopefully, they will think it was the hospital!

He demanded his truck keys two days after being released from the hospital! (He wasn't supposed to drive for 6 months due to the many seizures!) She was alone with him and he was screaming in the drive-way....she threw him the keys and told him she wouldn't take care of him it he got into another accident! (Which she knows, she would!) But he is so mean to her that she gave in to him as she doesn't know what he'll do to her!!!!

They are still talking about a POA...but have taken no action. My hubby came up with a good idea....instead of taking away the guns....just take out the bullets!! That way, if he comes across them, he sees they are there, but can't hurt anyone (or himself) with them.

There are very different issues when dealing with a hostile male, rather than a sweet, low-key female!

So I want to thank everyone for all their help and advice.... I will use all of it!



Choquis