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Old 10-20-2006, 08:36 PM   #1
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know some good games?

Hello! I'm 57 and my husband is 91; I'm able to dash home from work often during the day to check on him. He's going to bed earlier and earlier as days get shorter, so I've used table games to help keep him stimulated and up later. Checkers is now too complicated, so we've switched to simple kiddy card games, but now he quarrels over the rules and can't remember them well. Any ideas of good activities that don't involve rules to remember? About 3 years ago he decided that I was having an affair with our doctor.... now it's become a refrain of accusing me of stepping out on him with any guy, anywhere. He thinks I sneak out after he goes to bed. Any ideas on this, too? I've been reading many posts over the past couple of months. This is my first. So many of you are dealing with such very difficult situations! But you have had some great supportive ideas to share with each other. AliceJane

Last edited by AliceJane; 10-20-2006 at 08:54 PM.

 
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Old 10-21-2006, 12:16 AM   #2
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Re: know some good games?

Hi AliceJane,

Have you tried dominoes and just do not keep score. It is pretty easy - just match the # of dots to the same. It is the scoring that becomes complicated and could be argued over!

Have you looked up at the top of the Alzheimer Board forum? There are some "things" to do up there. My mom and dad, play solitare together. Well, actually she helps him.

Perhaps the others will come on tomorrow and add somemore.

Good Luck.

Love, Wannabe

 
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Old 10-21-2006, 04:44 AM   #3
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Re: know some good games?

Being suspicious is part of the disease. BUT, usually it is related to money issues, not unfaithfulness. In your case it may be the age difference. Going to bed earlier and sleeping longer is normal for old age, even without Alzheimer's. I found that with my Mom it was too difficult to play games of any sort, but she loved listening to the radio (operas, which I hated!) or classical music. She also enjoyed older church music.

Martha

Last edited by Martha H; 10-21-2006 at 08:45 AM.

 
Old 10-21-2006, 07:36 AM   #4
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Re: know some good games?

Thanks, Martha and Wannabe! You know, I bought dominoes a couple of weeks ago but didn't know any rules so hadn't used them yet. And solitaire for two sounds pretty good. Three cheers for 24-hour cable TV music channels (he likes easy listening) which calm him while I'm at work. You're right about the suspiciousness about money. He's about worn out a stack of his bank statements trying to figure out why his money is 'disappearing', thinking I'm responsible. But the hardest thing for me are his suspicions that I'm stepping out on him.... I've learned the hard way to just divert him. For many months I made it worse by getting upset, trying to talk him out of being suspicious. Hard lesson! But I hung in and much of the time now he feels he can almost trust me.... although whenever I go out anywhere at night (now a VERY rare event) or upset his routine in any way it all flares up again.

I'm so glad to have found Healthboards as a source of support!

AliceJane

Last edited by AliceJane; 10-21-2006 at 07:37 AM.

 
Old 10-21-2006, 03:33 PM   #5
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Re: know some good games?

My husband goes to bed around 8pm or 8:30 but is up and eating breakfast at 1am and thinks everyone else should be up too. Our daughter lives with us and is a great help to me but every night my husband thinks we are going to a party. When I tell him we are only going to watch tv and then go to bed he asks if we are going to stay in this building. He does not trust either one of us and believe me this gets really hard to deal with.

As far as games go...fat chance of getting him to play anything. He doesn't even watch tv anymore or try to read the paper. He pretty much justs sits around all day. He never was like that....always kept busy doing something!

Good Luck to you
Jan

 
Old 11-03-2006, 12:33 AM   #6
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Re: know some good games?

I just bought a memory game for 3 to 5-year olds....small cards with pictures....2 of each....to try to improve my husband's memory....Actually, you turn over the cards on one side and then attempt to match the cards. I don't know if my husband can do it yet, but I'll give it a try and let you know....he's had a hemmorhagic stroke of the right frontal lobe in Oct. '04. I also like throwing a small ball with him trying to hit a penny on the floor or on the sidewalk....My big problem is that he has NO motivation....he's apathetic.

 
Old 11-03-2006, 05:58 AM   #7
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Re: know some good games?

Try some of these:
  • Cut out pictures from magazines (use kiddy safe scissors btw)
  • Get MANY packs of playing cards with different coloured backings .. get him to sort them out.
  • Turn the cards over .. get him to sort black/red's
  • Play memory with him using the playing cards

You could also try a 'busy box' with just 'stuff' in it .. fiddly stuff he can fiddle with .. get textures (materials eg: felt, silk, cotton, denim etc) and shapes (wooden shapes) .. wool is always useful .. just for 'sorting'

Hope this helps


 
Old 11-03-2006, 02:50 PM   #8
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Re: know some good games?

Quote:
Originally Posted by AliceJane
But the hardest thing for me are his suspicions that I'm stepping out on him.... I've learned the hard way to just divert him. For many months I made it worse by getting upset, trying to talk him out of being suspicious. Hard lesson! But I hung in and much of the time now he feels he can almost trust me.... although whenever I go out anywhere at night (now a VERY rare event) or upset his routine in any way it all flares up again.

I'm so glad to have found Healthboards as a source of support!

AliceJane
I knew a couple, married 60 years, when the husband who was the sweetest man, developed AD. He started accusing his wife, who was in her 80's, of cheating on him and being a prostitute. It was so horrible for her. They both died within a few months of each other.

Jane

 
Old 11-04-2006, 06:11 AM   #9
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Re: know some good games?

Dad and I do a few things. One is puzzles which are either 12 pieces, or the 24 piece floor puzzle which we put on the table. The pieces are large and easy to work with. At times I need to start one side, or assist, but he gets it done and gets pleasure from completing it.

We also play the game Ker Plunk...We both take the sticks out and when the marbles have all fallen, Dad puts back most of the sticks (I do some but have him do most) .. This is good for his coordination and sense of accomplishment.

I have very young grandchildren so at times I approach the 12 piece like one of them took it apart and would he help me put it back together.

He loses the plots on TV but enjoys "Everybody loves Raymond" so I have purchased on DVD (from Amazon) the complete 6th series. They also have all the other series on DVD. When Dad needs a laugh &/or I need to get something done, I will pop in the DVD for 1/2 hour or so and he really enjoys it.

You can also find a good book on Amazon with Activities for Alzheimer patients. It includes activities for all stages of the disease.
Hope this helps,
Marci

 
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