My mother was moved to a hospital today, after heart arrythmia was found. We don't know how serious this is. They do have all the health proxies and do not resuscitate orders etc. I have a phone number where I can ask about her condition.
I have mixed feelings, from 'Oh no, not now, right before Christmas' to, 'well it is time for her to get some peace.'
PS My brother just got back from visiting Mom at the hospital, 1 hour's drive from his house. He said she was so excited by the drive in the ambulance with sirens roaring that she is immensely cheered up! She was not yet admitted (now she is) and they said she could have a sandwich for lunch. Mom says "can I have a beer with that?" and they say, "no beer, sorry". "That's OK" she answers, "I'll have a chardonnay."
This is the same woman who was apathetic and unintersted in anything yesterday.
Wow, maybe a little excitement is what is missing in her life!
Hi, Martha, I've noticed the same in my husband. When there is stimulation he communicates and takes part more in everything. Almost seems like he is getting "better" until the "next situation." But there must be something about the brain being stimulated. Just praying for God's timing in each step of your Mom's life as I know then the rest of the family can deal with whatever happens. It must be a relief though to know she is being watched more closely.
Well Martha, it's a heck of a way to find happiness but I know you're glad that your mom has found her smile again.
I saw on a news program several months ago something about some facility that is experimenting with bright, cheery colors (paintings, wall coverings but not floors) and music. They gave the patients bright crayons and put the patients in small groups. They colored, painted and sang songs although most didn't know the words. Those that could dance did.
They said that those who had the visual and auditory excitement in short increments several times a day seemed happier and needed less medication for depression than those who didn't. Maybe those bright lights and sirens were just enough to trigger your mom's attention.
I suspect your mom will surprise you yet again.
Oh Martha, you must add that chardonnay comment in the funny posts! How dear!
I hope that your mom is still cheerful. I was not online last night, so might have missed this then.
We just really do not know what to say, when one or our relatives with Alz. or dementia, becomes closer to dying. You want them to stay around for everyone that loves them, but if they are not enjoying life, you think - it might be better if they die!
Let us know how your mom is doing. We are all thinking of you and you are in our prayers.
Mom is being released to the NH today. She has heart failure and lung cancer. The heart meds stopped working. There is nothing they can do. She is too old for an operation or any other cancer treatment.
She will go back to the usual NH routine and die in a few months.
The doctor said there is no sense in a pacemaker which might prolong her life long enough for the lung cancer to get into a horrible painful stage.
This is sad but we saw it coming. My dad smoked heavily and died of lung cancer. Mom sat in the smoke filled house for the 41 years of their marriage. Amazing she avoided it this long.
Bill is trying to be cheerful with her and act as if nothing is wrong.
I am sorry to hear that about your mother. As long as she is not in any pain, then this is probably for the best, even tho those close to her, do not think so at this time... Does she need hospice? They will come to her nursing home.
Are thoughts are with you. Are you going to try and go to see her one more time? I know that it cost a lot of $ and time and you will still have to go, when the time comes. But, just think, when she goes to heaven (which I believe in), she will be back to her old self again. The imposter will be gone!
Martha, I am so sorry. I know you're trying to view this as a blessing for your mom but that doesn't make it any easier. You come here and voice your feelings all you need to. The next few months will bring a lot of mixed emotions. If you feel you can emotionally and financially go and spend Christmas with your mom, go. If you can't, that's ok too. You're in her heart and she is in yours and deep down, she knows that.
Two of my grandparents had AD and before they died, they both seemed almost like their old selves (before AD) and were very much at peace with everything. I hope this brings a little comfort to you.
How is E? With all the denial she was in until recently, I suspect this has hit her like a ton of bricks.
Thanks everyone. Mom is still in the hospital. She was not released yesterday and not today either. They won't tell us why on the phone.
My sister did finally agree - she also doesn't want Mom going through any unnecessary surgery - so we are finally all pulling on the same side of the rope.
I plan to go to NY soon, but if possible, after Christmas. My son from Miami will be here over Christmas and I hate to leave -but if I need to, he can stay with his sister. The prices go down after Christmas also.
I would like to sit and visit with her - whether she knows me or not - before that final trip when her funeral is held.
It's hard in spite of being expected. I keep visualizing her in a better place, whole, with her right mind. That helps.
Now it's Saturday and Mom is still at the hospital - yesterday Bill was told they couldn't organize the ambulette to transport her back to the NH. Now scheduled for 2 to 3 PM today.
Of course no one told her anything about the cancer or the heart problem. As far as she knew (and she has probably forgotten that already) she was there for a check up. When she gets back to her room at the NH she will probebly wonder where she is.