Repeating the same phrase..... - Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

terressa · 02-23-2007, 10:49 AM

My MIL repeats the same thing...."Are you mad at me?" over and over and over....
It gets to the point where she is really disturbing the other residents. No matter how reassured she is ;she just keeps asking. She is moving to another new facility next week. I can only imagine that another change will bring on new issues. She's in stage 6 now...
Is there anyone with a similar story? Any ideas on how we can change/alter her asking everyone all the time?

Martha H · 02-23-2007, 11:55 AM

It's so hard - but the truth is there is nothing you can do to make her stop asking that same question. Just ignore it and try to change the subject. Say we love you. You are wonderful. And let her ask it as often as she needs to. A new place may bring a temporary setback with other unexpected behaviors. Don't worry about it; she will soon be fine.

When my Mom entered the NH in 9/2005 she at first felt strange. Then she made friends with her roommate (at that time she was in the Rehab center, 2 in a room) and pretty soon she was telling me "She is my oldest firiend, we used to go to the senior center together." A bit later she thought everyone in the place was an old old friend.

Now she has lost all interest in the other residents. She just sits in her wheelchair and nods off. I would place her in phase 7 now, if I am correct. She cannot do anything for herself. She doesn't enjoy food. She hasn't fed herself for ages.

She no longer asks any questions. It gets to a point where you wonder why the person is still alive.

So just try to be patient and reassuring, as you have been, and know that this will pass, as she detaches more and more from life.

It is about the saddest kind of disease I can imagine...

Love,

Martha

angel_bear · 02-24-2007, 10:25 PM

I know of a lady who spends all her entire waking hours asking the same questions over ..and over .. and over ...

"Am I alright here?"
"Oh, tell me where to go"
"Where are we?"
"Where am I?"
"Where are we going"

And then repeats it ...

and this is constant, she dosn't stop unless she's dropped off to sleep. She drives the other residents NUTS. Mind you, she's very impatient with the others, and with the lady who claps (our cue she needs to go to the toilet) or with the other lady who inappropriate giggles constantly, she's very short and curt (to the point of rudeness) .. amazing .. she drives everybody mad,

But

She has no idea she's doing it either.

No idea at all ... none, whatsoever .. amazing isn't it?

Carers have gone up to her and said "your fine, you home, your not going anywhere" they have CONSTANTLY given her reassurance and 1:1 but as quick as you say "your fine" she's asking again "Am I alright" ....

There's absolutely NOTHING you can do (except hope she naps a lot and sleeps all night LOL) because it's an inbuilt lack of self esteem ...

Sad, and frustrating .. to say the least.

wiredqs · 02-27-2007, 08:56 AM

This behaviour is very common, but what comes next isn't better. Just quieter.

Laner · 05-06-2007, 08:16 AM

What has worked for me is to redirect the conversation. I also make sure I look at Mom and make her look at me when I answer that same question for the humpteenth time. Sometimes it clicks and she doesn't ask it anymore. I don't feel comfortable ignoring my Mom. Please remember this is "just part of it" and will not stop untill the last stage. When that comes you will want to hear her ask those questions.
Good Luck!
Laner