Moved Mom yesterday to a NH. She is on the skilled nursing unit right now to continue her PT for a while longer. Last night she thought she was at school (Baylor College of Medicine). Told us how fortunate she was to have gotten a scholarship there. But, she was happy, even if nothing she said made sense. My best friend went with me to visit, and asked me if I was OK with this. I told her no, but my feelings don't matter. It's what is best for her. She's diabetic and has one toe on each foot that does not look good. Took her two pairs of slippers up there so she did not have to wear hard shoes and the doc should have looked at them today. Taking more stuff tomorrow, pictures for her walls, tv, walker,(just like the one Chris's Mom has, oh Lordy, I hope it does not stay lost all the time!) She was eating dinner when we got there. So far some changes in taste, and suddenly not liking things fixed the way she has always eaten them is the only problem with foods. She has never been a picky eater.
We will hope, and see what the change brings. Every one there is very attentive. I keep telling myself she will be alright there.
Susie,
Whew! I'm sure you're exhausted, mentally & physically but good job getting your Mom to where she needs to be. In time, as she adjusts, you will find yourself relaxing a bit more and you might want to pop in at different times of the day & week to make sure you feel she is getting the attention and care she needs. It keeps the staff on their toes too. I'm sure you checked this place out and that they will take good care of her and you just KEEP telling yourself this is the best place for her!
Boy I'll bet you are tired. Just wears you out doesn't it? Your a good daughter. You have done what is best for your Mom. That is all I would ask of my own. Do whats best for me......and her.
Just check in at different times. Keeps everybody guessing. The staff at Moms place are great and they know that we are there alot. I too hope all works out for you both. You've done all you can. Try to rest and relax. Remember to think "positive".
Chris
Good advice Drew! I am glad the initial day is over for you Susie and thrilled to know that your Mom was happy, even if she didn't realize exactly where she is. I understand how hard today was for you because I have been there myself. But as Dad adjusted and it became even more obvious that it was where Mom and Dad needed to be. I had an Ibake style come to Jesus meeting with myself and realized it was best for everybody. I don't regret or have guilt about the move to AL, just annoyance that this disease made it necessary and there is nothing we can do about that. So know you have done the best for your Mom and yourself and your family. Hang in there..... I promise the initial shock of the change does ease with time.
Irregular but frequent visits for a while will let the staff know that you are involved. Getting to know the staff will personalize their job as well. Then be patient. All the kinks will not be ironed out over night but it will happen. You have done good.
Hi Susie, my mom still thinks she's at the academy some days. She even says things like, "is there school tomorrow?, I'd better start getting ready." I just go along with it and answer her questions.
I know how hard it is to watch the decline of a parent, and especially your own mom. I figure it's easier for me to be part of "her world" and not correct her than explaining that she's not in school anymore.
Deb is so right about the visits. I now know most of the nurses by name and they know me, and it does help to keep that line of communication open between you and staff.
Best of luck, it isn't easy but know that your mom is in the best place possible.