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Old 07-14-2008, 11:28 AM   #1
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Unhappy thankyou, and a bit about me

Thanks for the advice people. My mum and siblings live in edinburgh - scotland. I live in preston - england. one week in four I spend in edin. to give my bro and sis a rest. I chose to give up my job to accomplish this. My family support this decision. i.e. husband etc. I dont think my mum has AD. I believe that she has a dementia known as wernecke-korsakoff (hope sp. correct) Syndrome. She heavily abused alcohol for over 43yrs. She has declined gradually. But in the last 2 months she has collapsed twice, resulting in hosp. Just 4 weeks ago she had what the medics call an acute psychotic episode. Two medics, a social worker, police and ambulance turned up. She was sectioned for 72 hrs. We were informed that if after 72 hrs. they deemed her still acutely disturbed then they would apply to the court and apply for a "28 day compulsory detention order" They were quite frank that they would go over our heads. Mum did decline a bit. I spent 8 days up in edin. in the psychiatric unit from around 10.30 until 6.45. I felt like an inmate. The staff did a sterling job tho' She is more confused, and has gone down hill a lot. I will be glad when she dies. This is ripping us apart emotionally. She smokes like a chimney. Why has she not forgot how to do this? Thanks for letting me share this with y'all.

 
Old 07-14-2008, 12:12 PM   #2
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Re: thankyou, and a bit about me

It sounds terrible and you have my sympathy. I never heard of this form of dementia before. However, I applaud you for going up to Edinburgh to "Mom sit" so often. Oh how I would have appreciated that when my Mom lived with me for 5 years. My sister was only involved in her care by telling me on the phone what I was doing wrong, and assuring me that Mom was 'fine' - she could make that diagnosis over the phone.

My brother did help me a lot, at least an occasional weekend at his house and once they took Mom to Florida with them for 10 days. What a relief.

I hope that your Mom can get the round the clock care she needs. Are there nursing homes up there which specialize in people with memory loss and loss of normal thinking? I am sure the alcohol abuse had a lot to do with her deterioration.

God bless you and give you and your siblings the strength you need.

Love,

Martha

PS I visited Edinburgh back in 1998 in summer - had tea at the castle and admired the scenery ....

Last edited by Martha H; 07-14-2008 at 12:13 PM.

 
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Old 07-14-2008, 07:31 PM   #3
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Re: thankyou, and a bit about me

My heart goes out to you mentalmum. It doesn't matter what form the dementia come in.... it is still difficult. I do understand your feelings. It can't be over soon enough. Yet when it is over you miss the Mom you had. It's a lose lose situation. I do admire you helping as much as you do. There are so many siblings that either chose to be in denial, bury their heads in the sand, or just don't see the importance of that occassional help which can make the difference in sanity and insanity.

I do hope you find the care for you Mom that you need. I do not know what the situation is there in England. Mom and Dad (both have dementia) are in an Assisted Living facility that specializes in the care of Dementia patients. Moving them there was the best thing we have done.

As for the smoking. My Dad smoked most of his life. One day he threw his cigarettes and lights out of the car window and said he was done. That was about 20 year ago. He didn't smoke again until about 2 years ago. He would smoke any time he found a cigarette. Once in the Assisted Living facility, there were no cigarettes available, and he never mentioned it again. What does she do if she doesn't have access to the cigarettes?

Again, welcome to the board and I hope you keep typing here. It's a super group.

Love, deb

 
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