I've just returned from scattering some of my DH ashes in the lake where we used to have a cottage in northern Michigan. He loved to fish and two of his four brothers and some other family members were with me. There were three spots that were his favorites and I sprinkled ashes in each place. To say the least, it was a difficult day and at times I couldn't breathe. I know things will get better but there are days I can't imagine living without him. He was the love of my life and there will never be another like him. i registered for a Supportive Spouses support group which starts in September through Hospice and have created a team for the Memory Walk in our area for September. I know, one foot in front of the other....I'm working on that and for the most part, I'm doing pretty well.
Janie,
I won't pretend that I know how hard that was for you. But now there are tangible parts of your DH in the places he loved so and where you had wonderful, fun, relaxing family times, I am sure.
You're right, one foot, one day, one month, at a time. Let the good times through the years overtake you and wrap you in their warmth.
Thinking of you, and Bless you and your family,
Susie
DH is back where he loved to be and I must have given you closure to take him back. Beyond the pain, I can't imagine how incredibly hard it must have been, you were able to revisit moments in his life that brought him such joy. Remember the best of times. Know how incredibly lucky you were to have had him, if only for a while. The love you shared is evident. Good for you for taking the initiative to join the support group and to give back to the Momory walk. Having others that have walked your way to talk to and share the burden makes the road easier to travel. Giving back makes it all worthwhile. You are on a journey to the next time of your life. You are going forward and that's good. Your DH would want you to make it a good time. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other. I send you a big hug and wish for you the courage, creativity, and energy to get through these hard times.
Dear Janie,
I think of you often. Good to hear from you. I can't imagine the pain and sorrow that you feel. I'm very glad you have so much support. Nothing or no one takes his place I'm sure. But you have a loving family and your love for him is so evident in your words. The love you shared will pull you through this hard time. He would certainly want that for you.
Thinking of you,
Chris
I feel I have no words to console your grief or to lessen the pain. I do have thanks to you for all you do and say to us who are relatively new to these boards. Your expereinces have helped us. I wish I could return the favor.
Hang onto the towel honey, we won't let go. hang on and cry and keep putting on foot in front of another for as long as you need to, then just step up and walk next to us...It hurts like h*ll but you'll make it.
You'll get by with a little help from your friends.....
Susie, Deb, Martha, Chris, Meg & Ibake,
Your words and support mean the world to me and I come here everyday to see how you are all doing. Our connection helps me to cope with all of the sadness in our lives and I guess to help make sense of all this. I may not always post but know that I continue to pray for you all and I'm checking in to see if I can lend a hand. I love my towel and cherish it so much that it's always with me.