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Old 08-14-2008, 03:09 PM   #1
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You are the best

I haven't figured out yet whether caring for an AD loved one makes you a better person, or if people on this Board are just naturally more caring, more giving, and more helpful than the rest of the world. I just want to thank all of you.

My stint as an AD caregiver really ended with the passing of my Mom nearly 8 months ago. I'll still check in now and then to see how all of you are doing, but I am certain that you will all be fine, helping each other and doing your utmost to find a safe place where your loved one will be cared for until the end.

My hope and prayer for all is a cure for Alzheimer's and all dementias within the next few years.

love to all,

Martha

Last edited by Martha H; 08-14-2008 at 03:12 PM.

 
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Old 08-14-2008, 03:27 PM   #2
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Re: You are the best

Thank you Martha. How sweet and thoughtful of you to write to all of us. We still need your guidance and caring thoughts. Your the best.
Love Chris

 
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Old 08-14-2008, 05:31 PM   #3
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Re: You are the best

Martha-
Yours were among the posts that gave me the courage to accept the fact that I was not the only person capable of taking care of my husband. Thanks to those words he is now comfortably placed in an ALF.
I am, and I am sure, many others are, so very grateful for the time you took to post.
Raffeer

 
Old 08-14-2008, 06:20 PM   #4
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Re: You are the best

Martha,

Sometimes we become so ovewhelmed that we can't see the forest for the trees...you have been there for me with a compass to show the way. I so appreciate it and I can't express how much these boards have eased my pain. Thank you for your guidance and experience.

Love, Meg

 
Old 08-14-2008, 07:17 PM   #5
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Re: You are the best

Martha, you were one of the ones that had a come to jesus meeting with me when we were trying to decide if we were going to put Mom and Dad in AL. I don't know what I would have done without you and the others. Those of you that have done before thos of us that are in the middle are so important. You have the knowledge and experience that we need. So don't go anywhere. Keep checking in on us. So manpy of you have been there for me and I just hope to give back a little of what I have received.

Thank you all for being the wonderful caring people that you are

Love, deb

 
Old 08-15-2008, 11:16 AM   #6
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Re: You are the best

WAIT A MINUTE! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING? YOU DON"T JUST UP AND RESIGN.
<<<DEB..quick check to see if you can do that...can she?>>>>

You are like the Queen PooBah here dear Martha....you are our guiding mother...so don't think you can leave...tisn't a nice thing to do dear one...unless you are jsut going to iron the towels......

 
Old 08-15-2008, 09:03 PM   #7
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Re: You are the best

I just checked in the rule book IBake and rule number 42 says.... Martha has to stay!! I have so much further to go and I definitely need the expertise of Martha and those that have gone before me to finish what I need to do. So I hope Martha and all the other are planning to stay. There are days I can't see the forest for the trees and need somebody to knock my head into the nearest tree so I can see where I am going Besides.... I think I left all my spare towels with Martha so she's got to be around to hand them out

You gals are the best!!!!!!!!!!

Love to you all deb

 
Old 08-15-2008, 09:10 PM   #8
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Re: You are the best

Martha, please don't fade away!

I've been reading this board (and posting now and then) since 2003, and I've often wondered why I'm still here - my Dad died in 2006. I guess my reason is reading this board was part of my life when I was looking after him. In a strange way it's the last thing that ties me to that time. Granted, it wasn't a really good time -- but it's the time I had with him.

Also - I wish I would have had a heads up from some sensible people - like all of you here, when my Dad was in the "bad off enough to be a problem - but just OK enough I can pretend everything is OK because I want it to be" stage. Now I can chime in when I see someone about to make a mistake I made.

You're experiences have helped people - that's a good thing

 
Old 08-16-2008, 05:34 AM   #9
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Re: You are the best

I hear you, friends. I'll sitck around. Thanks for the ego boost!

Love,

Martha

 
Old 08-16-2008, 08:52 AM   #10
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Re: You are the best

I'm so sorry Martha. I just didn't realize that you needed a boost. Of course you do. I just count on you to help me with your wisdom and experience that I didn't stop to think that you must still be missing your Mom. Also its nice to be told that your needed. Everyone needs that from time to time.
Believe me when I say "I need you very much". Besides that your just FUNNY. You make me smile.
Have a good day friend,
Chris

 
Old 08-16-2008, 06:34 PM   #11
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Re: You are the best

Dearest Martha,
I dont come here as often as some of the other dear ladies, but it is always such a comfort when I do, because I always know that I will get a response from you. I am so glad you decided to stay on this board with the coaxing of these wonderful ladies. You are so valued here....and I cant imagine coming here without you being here!! You have been a great source of encouragement to me and I really value your advice.
Love, Caroline xo (Carsam)

 
Old 08-26-2008, 10:27 AM   #12
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Re: You are the best

Martha, I was so sorry to read after this long time of your mother's passing at the end of last year. What a wonderful daughter you were and what a wonderful person to contribute so long to this subject for the rest of us. My brother-in-law also passed away early in 2008. He was the person I would tune in to the boards for and your advice was so compassionate, so caring, so informative, that I would always click on your entries. Now there is someone else in our lives with the dementia problem, so I will be back here again, tuning in for any information I can to cope with what's going on. Please don't leave completely, come in now and again, and help us out. You contribute so much on this subject. Life goes on, and "life" for your mom can only be better - she knows no pain, but only happiness. One story I can pass on that made me feel better after my mom died.....

I had a psychic here at my house for a fun evening with my friends about three months after my mom died. I still was grieving. The psychic came in and immediately gravitated to me and said she must see me first. I did not know her, got her name from a newspaper. She sat with me, held my hands palm up, and said, you are grieving for someone very important to you - she is female, and her message to you is, please stop grieving. I would not come back if I could. I am so happy. I cried at first, but took the message to heart. We are so selfish - we want them back for us, not for them. Just a story, but it made me feel so much better in the months to come. I don't believe in psychics, but it touched a nerve. Best to you, Martha.

 
Old 08-26-2008, 07:54 PM   #13
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Re: You are the best

Martha...I can't believe what I'm reading, but I guess we've all come to depend on your wisdom and experience. My DH passed last May and I still come daily, I think as part of my mourning experience. You are always there for us and I know your Mom would be so proud of you. You're 8 months in and I'm only 4 months in but all I know is that I will be grieving for a long time and everyone here helps me move forward. Why, there's our wonderful towels, funny stories and advice for all to hear. Compassion passed from one to another and we've never even met! This is a special place and you will always be a part of it even if you don't sign on every day.

Love and blessings,
Janie

 
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