Deb...that first time you take Mom out IS a scary thing! (so is the 2nd...3rd.........)...but you'll get thru it and be glad you included her in your special day!
In those first few months after placing my Mom in an Alz. Facility...each of my siblings and I took turns taking her out for meals, ice cream...to the park. She was quite aware of the huge changes in her life...and hated the facility...hated US even more for taking her back each time. Words, actions, glares...even slaps, but after a few times, she realized she had no other choice. Difficult? Of course! Necessary? Sadly, yes...and she did seem to know it.
Soon the times we took her out became more difficult in where we were taking her (doctor, restraunt, store) than in returning with her to the place she now thought of as "home".
I'm glad you're including her...the time will come when this will not be possible. Nobody said this was going to be easy....and it's a good thing....I'd probably give 'em a good bop in the nose! I'll be thinking of you....and remembering the last times I was able to take my Mom out......Pam