Worried sick - Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

sammyo1 · 03-10-2009, 05:46 AM

I am worried sick here. The NS who was suppose to do my friends shunt for her NPH could not get her in right away. She is bad, can barely walk & at times wont respond. She looks terrable & the hopital sent her home.
My husband could not even get her in the car without help & the lady from the hospital who helped to take her to the car could not believe they were sending her home like that, but they did. I know its insurance, but honestly she is at huge risk here. She can barely put one foot in front of the other & they said to have her use a walker, with 24hr care. She cant use the walker at all, I have everyone using a gait belt, but maybe I should call for wheelchair. She is leaning when she stands. She is x10times worse then when she went in. The only thing that has stopped is the vomiting. I simply cant believe they sent her home like this. My husband did not know how bad she was till they got her out of bed at the hospital & then he had them call the surgeon & still nothing, said he is booked with surgerys & to send her home.
There is no short term care insurance & we are helping. The caregivers will work for 1/2 of what an agency will charge & that is the best we can do.
I am still recovering from surgery but went to see how she was due to her everyones concerns. You have to tell her to move her feet & she barely do so. took 2 of us to get her to the bathroom & washed up. She cant even help to get herself into bed. She just looks at you. She wont even take water with her meds, she will chew them & just stare at you. you have to try to get her to take a sip of water. She is really bad.
What damage or risk is involved here letting her remain like this for even a short time?
I swear its like there is one surgeon or something. I am so mad at her doctor, she led me to believe they would do the surgery while she was in there. To top it all off they had her for over a week & the NS wants a consultation next monday. That could have been done during her stay. I am furious that they sent her home like this. Her son is not reachable on vacation & I am mad about that to.
Any suggestions? I have a feeling we are in trouble here. I think the doctors know something should have been done long ago to. I am scared she will wake up & not be able to move again. What a mess. I really would like some opinions? Dont know what to do. Sammy

caringsister54 · 03-10-2009, 07:26 AM

Dear Sammy

I would call 911 immediately and get an ambulance to pick her up and take her back.

What that surgeon did was medical malpractice unfortunately like my husband, you can't sue when they don't do anything, you can only sue if they did something and it was done badly.

Not doing anything and sending her home was not considered medical malpractice but I feel in my heart its a close as it can get.

I would also call her insurance carrier and scream at them. This is bull.
I would tell them that if they don't get her into a hospital again ASAP, you will start to get a lawyer to look into this.

Her kid is unreachable -- they're hiding because they don't want to deal with it. Get someone else even a court advocate to be appointed to her for her care.

Sorry you are going through this.

I would call for an ambulance NOW!!!!

and I would videotape her periodically as she attempts to do certain things. And tell the insurance carrier, the hospital and the surgeon that you are doing so. It will be amazing when you say that just how scared everyone will be.

sammyo1 · 03-10-2009, 08:28 AM

You know I was so upset yesturday that is exactly what I thought I should tape some of this. I think my cell phone records some video if so I am sending it with someone. I sent my husband over there this morning to help & he will let me know how she is. He said if she cant get out of bed he will be calling 911 & he will also be calling her doctor today. It takes more then one person to get someone like that up & even calling an agency in would not change the circumstances.
If they insist she be home I am requestng a wheel chair, my gosh we are taking enough risks just having her at home. With her leaning back it can become dead weight & that is to much for one perosn to handle. At the first sign of trouble she is going back. Surely her doctors must know there is only so much that can be done at home.
I am still blown away. I worry what risks are involved here? Seeing her this bad makes me wonder if damage is being done in there.
I attempted to help with her last night & am in major pain today. I feel helpless here. I have adopted this couple & love them dearly. I am honestly on the verge of tears here. I dont feel I have the power to do much not being family but I wont sit by & let her be pushed aside. I told her husband he must speak up, he wants me to handle it all but his concerns may be more heard then mine being her husband. I have to agree at this time about the son, as he called & hung knowing my husband wanted to speak to him.
I dont think she will make it a week at home even. Can the family discuss their concerns with the insurance? I honestly feel her doctors that were involved with her last stay are scared, they know this was not dealt with & they know we tried to get them to do something. This really is a mess.

To all of you my heart goes out to you all, as your all angels & your loved ones are lucky to have you, this is tough & takes a special kind of person to deal with this. Bless you all, Sammy

mary09 · 03-10-2009, 06:26 PM

Dear Sammy...
Just wanted to add my support to you.....sorry to hear about your friend....god bless you for being so caring and wanting to help her.

I agree with Diane...I think you should call an ambulance and have them take her back to the hospital. While your heart is in the right place, you are not able to look after her, and it will only do you and she more harm than good to continue trying, no matter how much your heart wants to help. You can still check on her, but getting her professional care is the best thing you can do for her right now.....this is too much for anyone to handle, even those who are healthy.

Keep us posted, and I hope things go okay....
Love, Caroline xo

Gabriel · 03-10-2009, 08:10 PM

I totally agree... call 911, have them take her into the hospital, and refuse to bring her home until the necessary procedure is done. There has to be some neurologist on call that can do the procedure. just tell them that you can not deal with her at home. That it is not safe for her to be at home. Be firm.

If she is that bad now, she may not come back 100%. They are right to be scared that they totally missed the diagnosis. The longer she stays in this state the less potential for recover she will have. Did the neurologist give you a date for the surgery or just leave it pending? At this point I would want a new neurologist regardless. You don't just leave somebody in that conditions when there is a simple procedure that will help them... and then send them home to wait. You are right.... what a mess!!

Love, deb

PS.... I have actually sent Mom back to the hospital with Dad after a discharge. The night she took him in with a suspected stroke, the MRI didn't show anything so they sent him home. He couldn't walk either. I sent her right back to the hospital with him and called saying she could NOT take him back home. I arrived in the early morning hours. They had readmitted him and we later discovered a massive Xanax overdose. Nobody had bothered to do a toxicology on him. He ended up staying 5 days to clean out his system. Oh, and he got a new doctor as well. So it is doable