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Old 12-06-2009, 02:35 AM   #1
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Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

There are about 4 staff workers in each unit - an RN and several aides. The Nursing Home posted a note saying that cash gifts aren't permitted, but cookies or fruit are ok. The aides rolled their eyes at that.

I got the impression that slipping gift cards to the staff might be ok, but don't know how much to purchase. One aide and one RN in particular has spent a lot of time with DH and with us. One shift has been invisible (always in the rooms of more severely impaired patients when we've been there), so I don't even know who is on that shift.

First Xmas in the Nursing Home so I want to do the right thing!

Last edited by Beginning; 12-06-2009 at 02:36 AM.

 
Old 12-06-2009, 04:55 AM   #2
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

Food. My brother is a great cook, and every year on the day (usually before Christmas) they had their big party, he brought a huge pot full of beef or venison stew, or Swedish meatballs, or other gourmet food. This was not only allowed but greatly appreciated. Not candy or cookies since staff also struggle with weight issues just like the rest of us, but delicious food.

If it is against policy, I would not slip them cash or gift cards. Maybe other small gifts such as a small purse or bottle of cologne would be OK?

If you meet other caregivers who are visitng their loved ones, you could ask them.

Hope it works out for you.

I think of you often. Losing a husband in this way is surely harder than losing a parent, which we all must do at some point.

Love,

Martha

Last edited by Martha H; 12-06-2009 at 04:55 AM.

 
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Old 12-06-2009, 09:41 AM   #3
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

since this is your first time, how about a fruit basket for the front desk that way no one gets left out this year, and then next year you can see who it is that you want to make sure gets something extra...

 
Old 12-06-2009, 10:58 AM   #4
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

i dont remember what the rules were in the nh when my was there last xmas. we did slip cash and a card to the aids that would help my mom so much. 1 aid in return baked me cookies! gift cards could also be an idea.

 
Old 12-06-2009, 11:53 AM   #5
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

Beginnings

this is the first for you, so I vote for an all in one fruit basket to be shared by staff.

I agree that next year will be different. You will know them better, see whose better with DH and such.

Thanks

CaringSister54

 
Old 12-06-2009, 08:43 PM   #6
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

Cash gifts or cards directly to the aids is not allowed in our facility but they have a "caregiver's christmas week". The family members that want to can donate gift cards (they specify $5 cards)... as many as we want to. Then they do a lottery drawing. When the name is drawn they get to draw a card out of the bucket. Depending on how many are donated they get several each during the week. Beyond that we can bring in any goodies we would like. Cookies, candy, fruit, nuts, etc are all good. I absolute will slip a special token to a few of the caregivers. Mom's adopted Granddaughter care giver already had her surprise There is one that has cared for Mom since the day she arrived in May. She's amazing and Mom loves her. She will get something extra along with a few others. This weekend they had a bucket of christmas candy to enjoy and tomorrow they are getting hot apple dumplings. I have a pound cake in the works for later. I will keep it up through the holidays... and afterward because they are so very appreciative. Did I mention that this summer, all the extra produce from my garden somehow disappeared out of the Rem director's office Okra, corn, tomatoes, squash.... poof!!!

What amazes me is that they share what they get with the residents. I watched them passing out the candy to their "family". They made sure Mom, Dad, and others had fresh sliced tomatoes every time I brought them in. They are so good at giving back...

So do what your heart leads you to do

Love, deb

 
Old 12-06-2009, 08:55 PM   #7
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

How about a nice bouquet of flowers for the front desk with a card thanking all of the staff for their support and care and best wishes for the holiday season and for a peaceful and healthy new year. I'm sure that would be appreciated as well and would in a sense cover everyone.

 
Old 12-07-2009, 07:26 AM   #8
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

Deb, you reminded me of the atmosphere at Mom's NH. I had been so afraid .. that she would be treated like a number, neglected, not properly washed and changed, etc. All those fears dissolved into joy when I got there for the first time ..(I had to fly in from IN) and found nurses aides hugging her, spoon feeding her (at first the drugs from her hip operation made her so woozy that she could not find her mouth with the fork) and just loving her. Spraying ea de cologne on her because ''we all want to smell pretty" and so much more. They especially loved her bcause she was tiny, had big blue eyes (like a doll, they said) , and always cooperated to the best of her ability.

After several more visits especially when she was transferred from rehab to long term care, I was convinced Mom was not only OK there but fine! She enjoyed the guessing games they played, going out in the gardens, the food, eating with other residents, and the attention of the many nurses and aides. The place was expensive, but worth every penny.

They do see the patients as part of their family. Amazing, but true!

Love,

Martha

 
Old 12-07-2009, 08:29 AM   #9
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

In my many years working in a hospital, we were told that we were not allowed to accept gifts from patients for any reason. Cash or otherwise. I actually saw someone get fired for accepting a gift!

I would suggest something for the nursing floor, like a super duper coffee maker or something like that. It would be a group gift that stayed there, so no one could get in trouble, and everyone would enjoy it. If they have a microwave, maybe stock their freezer with nice frozen entrees for their lunches for a week. Or send pizza to feed them for lunch. Make sure you cover each shift. Even better, do it once a month! Give them a card telling them that on the 15th (or whatever) of the month for the next year, each shift would have two pizzas delivered. Your DH will get the royal treatment forever!

Just my two cents worth,
Emily

 
Old 12-07-2009, 08:30 AM   #10
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Re: Etiquette Question: Xmas Gifts for Nursing Home Staff?

Exactly Martha. Mom's main care giver calls her Mom and I couldn't be more loving and attentive. She frets over Mom, what she wears, now she looks, and how she feels. It was her that told me I was wasting my money in the beauty salon and she would do mom's hair (she doesn't get paid any more) so it would look better. Med techs, other care givers, nurses, the rem director... it's amazing how many hugs I see Mom get.... and it's not always when they know I am looking.

December 19 is the Rem caregivers Christmas party. For their Christmas party they invite all the residents, draw names and give each resident a gift. Then sing and dance and play games and the families bring in the party food. I can't wait. The facility party was great as well because our "family" stayed downstairs in their little world and it was truly family. I had to laugh because the facility director came down after the party upstairs had started. Sister 2 and I were putting the finishing touches on the party food while the caregivers were taking care of resident needs. We had not started yet. She made a comment and one of the caregivers looked at her and said... "We are on a different time zone... their time zone!" and smiled. Yep it is their world there and I am so very thankful for the wonderful family that is in it with my Mom and Dad.

So no, facilities are not the same as those of the past... thankfully they are wonderful caring homes when your loved one can live the rest of their lives surrounded by love, safety, and caring. You just have to find the right one

Love, deb

 
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