Gabriel

Rattle, it depends on the level of care that you do want and where your Mom is placed. There are good care facilities that you don't have to keep after them all the time. That was Mom's situation for the first year and a half. There are other facilities that are not as good and that is what happened to Mom's situation in the last year.

In way of explanation. The facility my Mom is in had an excellent unit coordinator. She had cared for her father who died of Alzheimer's and made it her life passion. She went back to school, started as a CNA, and worked her way up to coordinator. She was amazing and keep "her girls" (the care staff) on their toes. I never ever had a single complaint. If something needed to be done it was done. Then corporate had the bright idea to transfer her to another job and give us a new coordinator. That was a HUGE mistake because the new coordinator doesn't get anything. Yes, I have to stand on my head and gargle peanut butter to get Mom's Ensure given to her and a week later they just let it slide. There are medication errors. I do have to stay on top of everything right now. But in time this lady will be gone and I pray for somebody that can run the unit effectively again. There is another facility I can move mom too that would be as good as this one was in the beginning but after 2.5 years this is Mom's home. In her advanced stage it would not be good for her to move her to a new facility. So I muddle through going frequently and having additional eyes (Hospice) that also watches her closely.

I do chose to change Mom when I am there. This is for assessment purposes. I do go see her three to four times a week... if not more. I did that even when everything was going well. I just hate that now I spend about a quarter of my time there complaining to somebody about something.

When you look for a facility you need to check your state inspection agency for any deficiencies or ratings the facility might have. You need to go to the facility several times on both first and second shift. You need to be there during meal time. You need to stay and hang around a while. Watch the interaction between the residents and staff. Then you need to go to the parking lot, hang around, and talk to a few family members who have residents in the unit you are looking at. That is where you get your best information Don't make a decision on a quick tour by a marketing director. Be sure you talk to the unit coordinator, the nurse, and some caregivers. When you have done all your homework then follow your gut feeling. If you hesitate, walk away and find another place Go to several facilities and compare them. Also be sure you have the right placement. Be honest in your assessment of your Mom and what she needs. Assisted Living usually has much less one on one care than a locked dementia unit or a nursing home. If your Mom can do some things for herself that may be ok but if she needs more one on one care then make sure there is enough staff in place. Know that what your Mom gets is always per doctor's orders so be sure that whatever she needs is ordered by the physician. Just know that even when you find that perfect facility, it is only as good as the people that are there at the moment!

Love, deb