Gabriel

Many times when there is a sudden decline as your husband had due to a medical procedure, anesthesia, or other change... we look back and say oh yeah, those changes I saw before were probably not just normal aging. Hind sight is 20/20 many times.

There are medications that will help with the delusions but I never found anything that would make them go away in Dad's case. Most of my Dad's delusions also involved danger, fear, or anxious situations. It is what they are. One thing you learn is not to deny the delusions. It is very very real to him even if you know they are not real. It does help to acknowledge the fear and anxiety he has. "I know this scares you" Then give a solutions such as "I will contact the police". You don't contact the police but you can pick up the phone and talk into the receiver. Do what it takes to calm him and let him know you are doing something. Try to reassure him that actions are being taken to resolve the anxious situation.

Dad had constant delusions about his little brothers being in trouble down the hall. He would get up in the middle of the night to go check on them. I always acknowledged his fear and anxiety over his brothers care. I even praised him for being such a good attentive brother. I would assure him that I would go check if he went back to bed.... or just wait on me. I would go out of the door, stand just beyond that closed door, and then come back. I would assure him his brothers were ok and help him back to bed. Sometimes it took more than one trip to visit the brothers and sometimes he had to go with me. But validating his emotions, helping him find imaginary solutions to his imagined problems, reassurance it would be ok, and lots of patience usually worked.

The wish for our loved ones to have a peaceful life is universal. We do the best we can but sometimes this disease doesn't let us have exactly what we want. What we have to do is the best we can with the disease.

As for the vitamin B... yep the hot flashes and itches are a side effect. A vitamin B deficiency can create confusion but those are extreme cases. Vitamin B doesn't make Alzheimer's or Vascular Dementia go away. If he is having annoying side effects than why continue the medication. I agree with your decision to take him off.

In light of his current diagnosis of Alzheimer's you might want to rethink other medical decisions. Do you want to be as aggressive now as you did when there was no dementia? Is it beneficial to him in the short term? Is it going to improve his quality of life now? The dementia diagnosis changes so many of the parameters that we use to make decisions.

Love, deb