Wishing each of my heath board friends Happy Holiday.. no matter how you celebrate. I wish for each of us, and our loved ones, a better year with patience, love, understanding, comfort, and relief. Let the peace of the season surround us
The following user gives a hug of support to Gabriel: dorri (01-04-2012)
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Gabriel For This Useful Post: aras (01-05-2012), dorri (01-04-2012), ninamarc (01-09-2012)
Deb hon, thank you and all the best to you and your family and all members and guests who come to these boards. May God be your guide, your strength, peace and patience in this New Year. May we all find the rainbow in between the clouds, the laughter and smiles in between the tears and the hope and encouragement in between the despair. Happy New Year to you all.
Mom spent Christmas with my sister and her family. She apparently gave her a hard time so I hear. Mom told me it was too much running around for her. I knew it would be. Christmas and holiday celebrations are stressful even for younger healthier people so it was understandable that it would affect mom this way being away from the Nursing Home.
Dorri it is good to hear from you and I do hope you are well. You are right about your Mom spending time away from her routine and safe haven with your sister for the holidays. It is no surprise Mom was out of sorts That is why I spent time during Christmas with Mom where she was safe and secure. It as a good Christmas
Deb, thanks for being there for me thru out the year (s). You really did save me from crumbling more than once.
My sister told me rather last minute that she was sending mom to my other sister's for Christmas. I did have my concerns, and it turned out that it wasn't such a good idea. Mom is complaining that it was too much running around for her, yet she is already planning on coming to see me, but after it warms up, she says, giggle? It usually takes my mom a couple of weeks or longer to settle back in after she's been moved even for 2 or 3 days. Nice that you and your mom and family enjoyed Christmas. God bless you all with a Happy & Healthy New Year.
When Mom was able to converse she made lots of plans which I put off until next weekend, next week, the spring, later in the summer, ... you get it! If rule one is that you don't argue with someone with Alzheimer's then rule two has to be keep them in their safe routine. We like variety. We love holidays. We like changes. They do NOT! Even if they say they want to go somewhere it is confusing for them each time they are taken out of their routine.
I love that one sister at the last minute sent Mom to another sister. Are you still rotating Mom? Yikes!
Happy New Year to all. and may 2012 bring a breakthrough for the treatment of dementia. Thanks to all for helping me make it through another year. I pray for peace and comfort for our loved ones, thereby giving peace and comfort to us.
Mom is now pretty much stabilized in her Nursing Home. It has become her home and safe haven.
My sister had to work the holidays and couldn't visit mom in the NH so thought it would be nice for mom to see my sister and her family for a couple of days.
Mom will have to adjust again, as this year or next, they are building a new NH in a different location, so that may take some time getting use to.
As for rotating mom, that was stopped some time ago, as you know we tried it but couldn't care for mom the way she needed.
As for mom wanting to come and visit, I never stop her from hoping, I say "sure mom", but when the time comes, mom doesn't want to go anymore. I'm use to that as well.
Deb, your mom does communicate some, does she not? My mom still does and surprises us at times that she can still talk and lead on a conversation. Sometimes her conversations are very repetitive.
That is what I thought Dorri but WOW!! I insisted that Mom stay put for Christmas.... and other holidays... several years ago. My two younger sisters did go see her the weekend before Christmas and my other sister was in and out a couple of times near Christmas. I spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day there. But in reality Mom didn't have a clue it was Christmas at all. It was just another day in her safe haven. I went more for me than Mom We think it would be nice if Mom was with us when in reality it is our desire because Mom doesn't have the ability to understand time.
You are doing the right thing with Mom by not discouraging her "wishes". I did the same with Mom. I validated her wishes and promised the future. I left her hope in tact. But without an understanding of time she was just find if she believed it would eventually happen.
Mom's use of spoken language is almost gone. Her ability to process auditory input left early. So the ability to verbally communicate with her is difficult. But yes we do still communicate. I know when she is happy, when she likes something, and when she is frustrated. I watch her facial expressions and the tone of her spoken gibberish when she tries to speak. Occasionally she will put together a 2 or 3 word statement but it is usually related to some visual input or some scattered random thought that pops in her head. You have to be alert to catch any words because there is no repeat! I was feeding her the other day and put a piece of celery on the spoon out of the soup. I know she doesn't like celery. She didn't even try to say anything but she took her finger and pushed the celery off the spoon. That is communication