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Old 01-04-2012, 11:08 AM   #1
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really scary!!!!

oh I have many phone calls out at the moment,,,, waiting for the return calls, the hospital never made us aware of this, unless it concerns us personally I am not sure they have to, my mom fits the criteria of the news casters description .

This was the headline..

Hospital sex assault on B.C. senior leads to arrest
Attack leads to change in health authority's mixed-gender policies

Last edited by moderator2; 01-04-2012 at 12:14 PM. Reason: please do not post news articles or any copyrighted material

 
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Old 01-04-2012, 11:38 AM   #2
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Re: really scary!!!!

yeah, that is scary. I do know in Canada they hold patients in the hospital for extended time before they are placed. Here they are rarely held for extended time. We don't have the issue of mix gender that you seem to have. The elderly is also not usually kept in the same area with younger residents. Yet we all need to be aware of the potential for abuse of elderly loved ones with cognitive impairment.

Beyond that be warned that abuse by care givers is possible. I just had a care giver fired for what I considered abuse. Not only did she jerk Mom's arm with me sitting beside Mom, but after I spoke to her and warned her not to do that ever again to anybody, she did it to another resident with me watching. Be watchful of the interaction and do not accept less than the best.

Beyond that watch the reaction of your loved one to their care givers. They may not be able to communicate or remember but the basal parts of the brain will register when somebody hurts them. This is part of our basic instincts that don't leave easily until the brain stem, which is the last to go, is affected. If there is a voice that causes your loved one to recoil then check it out. If there is one care giver that they fight with then check it out. Your loved one may not be able to verbally communicate with you but their reactions are communication none the less.

Example... My Mom, to this day, will break out in a huge smile when the old Rem Coordinator speaks to her. This is a dear lady with love and compassion and Mom remembers that. She doesn't know her name but she knows how she feels. Mom always frowned and mumbled incoherent sounds that let you know she didn't like the last Rem Coordinator. The lady had no compassion and it was just a job that she didn't do well. Amazingly it was Mom's reaction that validated my feelings about this lady Now that she is gone.. yep gone gone gone ... I am hoping for something better. When Mom smiles at her I will know we have a good one!

Love, deb

 
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Old 01-04-2012, 12:09 PM   #3
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Re: really scary!!!!

over the last three months I am amazed how intune i am with my mom.. yes she does have a hard time vocalizing but I can tell when she is sleeping when she is about the wake, I can tell when she is tired if she will sleep deep or light by the way she breaths, I look to my moms reaction to the nurses on the floor to see how she reacts, although I do not have much choice i do watch the ones who she reacts badly with very, very closly, and if I see something I do not like i have no qualms about speaking up, the other day one of the nurses was fustrated with one of the patients and through her hands up in the air stating that she new nothing about these patients, she had just come on shift and I had never seen her before, anyway as she passed me in a huff, I told her rather loudly that she should read their charts before coming onto the floor, she stalked off and grabbed one of the charts and slammed it down on the desk. I watch her like a hawk...Last night i had to report one of the nurses who said they had given my mom one of her meds, when in fact my mom was sleeping at the time and I had never left her side for a minute, my kids were there for a visit and most of the time my mom had been sleeping, The nurse wrote that he had given her her meds at 6.00, well unless there is someway to give meds while the patients is sleeping it not happen. So I reported him. I do not care that the first reaction was that I must be mistaken, but I stood my ground and no I was not mistaken and that the nurse was obvisley mistaken... so again one more thing to tend to today, as this happen late yesterday and of course it happened after the administrators had gone for the day.... if it is not one thing it is another thing to worry about...

 
Old 01-04-2012, 12:19 PM   #4
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Re: really scary!!!!

I agree Jags... it is always something and we have to be every watchful not assuming that all is well. My big problem was Mom's psych meds and her melatonin. Your Mom was feisty this morning... HUH? Why? Could it be that you didn't giver her psych meds when you should have and then tried to get her ready for the day when she was in need of her meds that you didn't give her. Who's fault is that? Don't call me at 9 or 10 in the morning telling me that you can't do anything with Mom when her psych meds are still in the cart! And don't even think of calling me again to say that Mom has fallen in the late even when you gave her Melatonin early along with her other meds because it was easier and then let her walk around in a fog! Yep, you have to pay attention to every detail because Mom can't do it for herself. Keep that watchful eye trained on those around Mom

Love, deb

 
Old 01-04-2012, 03:02 PM   #5
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Re: really scary!!!!

Do they not fill in the charts as they do each room? I wonder if they do all the rooms and then just work on their reports. Not an ideal situation by doing it that way. It's just like your checkbook, you write a check then post it in the check register not later when you've got enough on your mind. It's difficult to keep checking on someone constantly when you've thought that it's being taken care of already. Hang in there and stick to your guns. Maybe keep a notebook, documenting when you or family are there and for how long. If you are doing this consistently, then they have to consider that they could be wrong.

 
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