My mom passed away on September 29th at 12:58 p.m. I was holding her hand and talking to her as she took her last breath. I thanked the Lord for letting me be there. I had promised my Mom in the begining that I would be there for her until the end of this journey. I promised I would not let her walk alone, because she was scared. The services was nice and many, many people came to pay their respect, my Mom was loved by so many and what a sweet soul the lord took from this earth. I have to go to work tomorrow and have been getting sick today, just thinking about going back out into the real world and acting like everything is ok, when life will never be the same again. How do I go on...for 10 years my Mom has been what I thought about every waking moment...Now I am numb and do not know what to do with myself.
This board has been my lifeline at times and I wish I could help someone as much as you all have helped and supported me through this ugly, horrible, nasty disease. I pray that a cure is found and no more families have to go through this nightmare.
God bless each one of you and thank you from the bottom of my heart!
Love,
Julie
The following 2 users give hugs of support to: CAJ0818 bbroke (10-08-2012), Nitalong (10-28-2012)
Julie, I am so sorry to know that your Mom passed away last month. Please accept my condolences. You had done well for your Mom for such long-term caregiving.
You will have mixed emotion. You miss her but you didn't want her to suffer from such horrible disease! You will get better. Please continue to post here and we are all in this together for this thing - before or after! My late FIL died in July so I know it will take a while to settle down.
Glad that your Mom's service went well!
Take care,
Nina
Last edited by ninamarc; 10-08-2012 at 09:04 AM.
The Following User Says Thank You to ninamarc For This Useful Post: CAJ0818 (10-08-2012)
Julie, I am so very sorry for you loss and celebrate the life of your Mom. Glad the services went well and your Mom was well remembered. These are healing steps for you... and they go on.
It is difficult to pick up and keep going but that is what your Mom would have wanted for you. You are a wonderful daughter and did everything in your power for your Mom's care and comfort. Yes, it is an all consuming undertaking. We do tend to lose ourselves in the process. The end comes too suddenly and then we are lost as to what to do next. Sitting in our grief, not only for the loss of a loved one but also for the loss of our way of life, we don't know how to go forward. My advice to you is to do just like you did before. You take one step at a time using the courage and strength that you know you have. Yes, the world goes on.... and we must as well. This is what your Mom would ask of you now if she could. She wants you to be happy. She wants you to carry her in your heart but she does not want to weigh you down. Just as you championed her before... now she is championing you. Listen to what she would say to you now if she was beside you. It is going to take time, strength, and courage to find a way to carry her memory with you. Give yourself time and patience and you will find your way.
Love, deb
The following user gives a hug of support to Gabriel: CAJ0818 (10-09-2012)
Julie, so sorry for the loss of your sweet mother. You have crossed a bridge that many of us still have to cross. I hope that time will help heal your sorrow and you will have many good memories to comfort you.
Aras
The Following User Says Thank You to aras For This Useful Post: CAJ0818 (10-09-2012)
julie, this has been a hard long road that you have traveled with your mom, I am sure that she is looking down and thanking you for all that you have done. All on this board will face or have been where you are. what you have gone though and although and yes it is really heartbreaking, my mom has been gone now for just over 6 months and it still tears me up at unexpected times. I am not sure if I will ever get over it, there was such a sense of loss, before she passed it seemed like I had purpose and then after I felt that I was adrift. life does go on. Take one day at a time and know that your hero will always be with you.. your experiences will be needed to help someone else on this board so stick around and keep intouch...
'hugs judy..
__________________ Forever in my heart
The following user gives a hug of support to jagsmu: CAJ0818 (10-15-2012)
Forever in my heart 
