I was reading through a couple of enteries people have made, and it seems consistent that anger issues influence the relationships with people you love the most; the same is true for me. Lately, my boyfriend and I's relationship has been rocky. He's tired of my unpredicatable behavior. I always lash out on him during my period, which I find hard to control. It feels like the world is turning against me; I think sad thoughts untill I cry, and I'm extremely irritable. I'm a very tiny girl and I can see fear in my boyfriend's eyes when I yell at him to stop doing something I find irritating (during my period). Once, I hit him in the face giving him a swollen eye. This is VERY atypical of me and I felt terrible afterwards, but all I could do is say sorry because I don't know how to deal with my PMS. When I was younger I had anger issues, and it seems that they prevail during this time. Otherwise, I am fairly even tempered. If anyone else similar issues or advice, I would greatly appreciate a response.
Yes, I do have a boyfriend... He gets REALLY frustrated with it and we have almost broken up numerous times... I threaten to break up with him or suggest it, but right after that I start crying and apoligizing...
I have thrown stuff at him and it's getting to the point where I just dont want to see him because I dont want to hurt him... Ya know?
I've been with him for almost a year and a half and I just dont want to lose him over something like this... He is the first boyfriend I've had, long term, and he's also the love of my life... We have talked about getting married and having kids and I'm afraid that my bursts of anger are going to prevent that from happening...
I have NEVER been an angry person... Thats why it's so confusing
YOU DO SOUND LIKE ME. This is also my first serious relationship and the love of my life. I have been looking PMS up on the internet, and came across a few things that are supposed to ease the experience: working out, diet, vitamins, and for severe cases, medication. I'm going to try and work out three times a week for atleast a half an hour. Also, I plan on getting iron and B6 vitamins. I know different vitamins aid different types of PMS, so if you try this make sure you look into it first. I'll let you know if any of this works. Do you have any suggestions to ease PMS? Also, are you on the pill? I was before, but I'm going back to the doctor to find one that's better for me emotionally.
I have a severe allergy towards birth control... Something called Eurothema Nodosom or something... Anyways, basically in short form, my legs swell up in huge painful lumps and I cant walk... So oral contraceptive isnt my thing... I was on it for 3 months and then stopped because of the reaction... and I dont think I've ever been the same... I havent heard much about how to ease PMS. All anyone has told me is to just learn how to control it... but honestly, I dont think I can. I lose ALL control and I cant even think when I'm upset.
but I think I will look into the vitamins because it sounds better than being medicated eh? Goodluck and I'll check back to see how you're doing, and to also update on any progress!
Girls...looking to Bioidentical hormone replacement therapy. I "suffered" greatly from PMS and being irrational. My hormones were out of whack. There are great books on this subject at the book stores under woman's health. See if you relate to them as you thumb through them.
Bioidentical hormone replacement is safe. It's hormones that match and replace our lacking hormone levels exactly. Synthetic hormone replacement is AWEFUL and Dr's have just learned how harmful they have been to woman....but the bioidenticals are extremely safe..and have made a HUGE difference in my life.
I have NO PMS whatsoever.
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Remind your bf that MOST girls have pms. So it's not like he's going to find someone without it! Just realize when you are going to be at your worst. Try not to do anything that will set you off. Know the signals and leave the room and take deep breaths. PMS is not an excuse to be nasty. You know it's mind over matter. You know how you are - you don't have to accept it. There are some natural ways to deal with this and it looks like you're going to investigate. good luck
If you open the door even a little bit - the devil will fling it open. Keep it closed with prayer.
Have you checked the woman's health board for the thread pmdd. Normal women like us who are normally nice can lost control for no reason, 10-14 days before their period, along with lots of other issues. Check the thread and let me know what you think.
How about some Celexa or Lexapro 2 weeks before you start your cycle? A few years ago, at the age of 35, I noticed I did an awful impression of Atilla the UnHunny about a week and a half before my cycle, I was cussing people out on the road for going too slow and snapping at everyone, I even got rid of a dog cause I couldn't handle dealing with her. The Celexa helped with being moody and wanting to annihilate mankind.
Zeethan, you only take celexa 2 weeks before your period and stop until the next 2 weeks? If it takes 6-8 weeks for an ad to get into your system, how does this work? Just curious.....hey, the idea of taking an ad as little as possible, but enough to work sounds great to me!
I just wanted to comment on your first thread by saying that PMS can play a big part in someone's relationship. I know it did in my case. I've also had anger issues since childhood, but mainly just temperamental or moodiness. But when I turned 16 and had my first boyfriend, that's when I realized how serious PMS can be for some women. Especially if the guy is laid back and sympathetic to your needs. When you are ill with your parents, they just tell you to get over it or ground you! LOL... It's the romantic relationships that are hurt the most.
It starts out OK, because you (me, speaking) are a generally nice person so when that time comes around, they want to coax you back into that mindframe, thereby making you "happy". I think this becomes "addictive" to women, to have a man so eager to make you happy. However, after awhile, the guy will get tired of it.
As for myself, I started taking Paxil about four years ago and that has helped me alot. But still, I find those symptons returning like clockwork every month. You can try all the medications and remedies in the world, but it must first start with your mind. And talk to your boyfriend about it and convince him that it is a serious disorder, not just something we women make up! We have a little joke around my house....I made a cute poster with all sorts of danger, warning, etc. signs that I put up on the refrigerator each month when its "that time again". It doesn't let me get away with being mean, but it does warn my husband and he'll stay busy and out of my hair. I don't know your age, but I wish I had come to terms with PMS while I was a teenager, instead of waiting (Im 27). I'm glad I waited for the right one, but I hurt a few along the way.
Last edited by rootcanalqueen; 03-01-2005 at 03:57 PM.
Reason: wrong post
Share this with the men in your lives: I (R) have been married to my wife (B) for over 25 years. B was always extremely emotional around the time of her menstrual cycle, and over the years, the anger component of those emotions grew and grew until about one year ago, I sadly resigned myself to the fact that I could no longer live with the love of my life.
For the first many years, I reacted to her anger with my own anger, which only made things worse. Once we realized that she had a medical problem, PMS , it mitigated things some for me, but I still continued to suffer from each episode which grew worse with each passing year, even though we sought help from every source possible, including medical, homeopathic, healing services, etc. Each seemed to help a little, yet the problem worsened. So now after 25 years, I was finally determined to run while I still retained some of my own sanity.
Even though I have always been attractive to women and have continued to receive invitations from many, I have always been so in love with my Bride , B, that it was easy to ignore those flirtations. Now here I was, facing the end of my marriage, receiving even more invitations and yet I could not imagine continuing life without B . I prayed even more earnestly for help.
During the next outbreak of her unimaginable anger, I was suddenly filled with peace as the answer suddenly became so very clear: My wife has an illness, possibly inherited, but nonetheless an illness for which she is not responsible; I love her more than life itself. Ignoring the blows and the threats, I put my arms around her and held her tightly, while softly speaking to her. I told her that I knew that she was not responsible for the illness that was causing her to be so mean and angry. I told her that I loved her so much, that there was not anything that she could ever say or do that would make me stop loving her or leave her. I told her that I was going to hold her until she felt better. I held her and gently kissed her face until she relaxed in my arms.
I continued to do this during each subsequent anger outbreak. Each episode continued to get shorter and shorter. Now, six months later, she rarely has an anger problem, and if one erupts, I respond the same and it immediately melts away.
Yes, the anger was diagnosed as a PMS related medical condition. Yes she received drugs, hormones, herbs and other kinds of therapy/help. But in the end, what worked the best was pure, unadulterated LOVE.
This is a true story. Please feel free to share it with your loved ones in the event that it could be of help to you. I have been given the gift of having my bride returned to me. Maybe the men in your lives could be as blessed as I.
All the symptons you guys (gals) are describing is known as PMDD (Pre Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder). It a very serious form of PMS. I was diagnosed a little over a month ago and prescribed medication to help control it. I strongly urge any woman who feels out of control; like a completely different person the two weeks before her period to seek help from her doctor. I was prescribed Paxil, and although I'm not completely thrilled with the medication itself, it worked wonders controling my "uncontrolable" irritability. Don't risk your relationships with your family and loved ones over something that can be fixed. Look up PMDD on the web and check out your options. Get help!!
I've suggested a topic to the moderator specifically for PMDD, since it is different than anxiety or depression. Those may be some of the symptoms, but hormonal changes and low seratonin levels are the cause of the problem. Hopefully we'll get that PMDD board!