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-   -   how does one control the anger inside u? (http://www.healthboards.com/boards/anger-management/26773-how-does-one-control-anger-inside-u.html)

cookie monster 08-03-2002 04:46 AM

how does one control the anger inside u?
 
Hello,

Dunno if this is the rite place to ask but ...

I sometimes get angry very easily & one can see me seething with rage (not to the point of beating people up). Frens advice tat it's not good; all tat anger does is gimme wrinkles. I should instead, calm down & focus on why I'm angry.

Any ideas?

a 08-05-2002 11:00 AM

meditate
chop wood
make bread from scratch
write a letter to what/ whoever is making you angry
talk to someone
pull weeds
clean house
scrub floors
spend time with folks you're not angry at
take a walk

hope that helps
a

ice_tornado 08-06-2002 04:43 AM

hey man, try finding a hobby u can just relax with an no stress, like me if i get mad, i jsut lift weights and take all my anger out, hell i got a 6-pack and can bench 230 now ;)

buck58 08-06-2002 05:17 PM

I have a terrible anger problem too. Doc put me on anti-deppressants and my anger has all but vanished. Might not be the perfect remedy, but the outcome was good. see ya, buck.

cookie monster 08-06-2002 09:46 PM

Hello everyone,

Thank you very much for your replies.

Hmm ... lotsa different things make me mad/angry. Like flatmates who STILL bang their doors DESPITE me asking them nicely many times not to do so (try listening to doors KA-BOOM at 1am or 7.30am ...), reading newspaper reports, frens accusing me wrongly, myself not folding up my own clothes despite having washed them 2 months ago ...

I get angry easily. Then again, frens have remarked that though I get angry (easily, I cool off just as quickly. Sometimes though, I bear grudges. Tee heheee!!

I agree that what might work for one person might not work for me. Although, I love to be filthy rich. So that when I throw a tantrum, I can throw plates against the wall to cool down & not worry. Hahahaa ...

I know you know other words to use...please do!
Thanks!


[This message has been edited by moderator1 (edited 08-08-2002).]

Dora 08-11-2002 04:18 PM

You may be deficient in some nutrients, especially the B vitamins. You might try taking a B Complex which has a lot of the B vitamins together. I read an article on anger the other day on the Net posted by I believe it was Community Gateway Church. They had several topics, sort of like sermons, and that was one of the topics. It was very enlightening. Good Luck.

seeker2002 08-15-2002 05:27 PM

hummm sometimes I wonder if this question is a joke or not ...but here goes.....something you can control somethings you can't .....if people see that things offend you sometimes they do it on purpose just to get you mad......you need to express your anger in constructive ways such as sports, hitting a pillow or punching bag.....its okay to get mad I would get mad when someone slams a door and I am sleeping...maybe you can look into other accomodations or friends taht really care about you and certain boundaries

hulagirl 08-25-2002 10:47 AM

I must say I get mad easy. The only way to describe it is, its like, Im a shot glass and everything that makes me mad is one drip into the shotglass. When the shotglass is full from people on a daily basis trying their best to screw me over and someone thinks they are going to add to it. I blow!!!! [img]http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/blob_fire.gif[/img] As little as the drop maybe, my shotglass is already full so it's like the straw that broke the camels back. This shot glass never goes down because I have not figured out away to deal with the issues with others. I for some reason can not seem to get away from situations where people mess with me for no reason and I feel like what they are doing is unjust. I either want to drag their butt to court or sit on their roof top and wait with a sniper rifle, if the court fails to give justice.
I know someone said how do you handle it? Im not the type that is going to bend over and take it and forget what they did. So that leaves me with driving by their house with a flaming bag of crap, screaming and flipping them off. lol Now that isn't healthy! I feel better and all, but I should beable to find other ways to deal with it. HELP HuLa

[This message has been edited by hulagirl (edited 08-25-2002).]

[This message has been edited by hulagirl (edited 08-25-2002).]

[This message has been edited by minerva (edited 08-26-2002).]

cookie monster 08-29-2002 05:58 PM

Hello everyone,

Thanks for your replies.

The reason I posted this topic is (mainly) due to my INCONSIDERATE flatmate.

I'm an insomaniac & lite sleeper as well. I've asked her nicely, pleaded with her, talked with the flat assistant to no success. She still KA-BOOMS her door. When will SHE learn tat there are pple who can't fall asleep as easily as she does??? 'cos I got woken up AGAIN at 7.30am, when I don't need to get up so early.

I fear for myself & her too. I've put up with this for over 6 months & sooner or later (me thinks sooner) tat one will see the headline "woman strangles flatmate in anger".

Anger makes pple do weird things, though it doesn't mean tat one can plead anger as the sole/main cause for their actions. One has to take responsibility.

I'm boiling with anger inside rite now.

strawberries 09-03-2002 04:40 AM

I too get very angry! This has only happened fairly recently since I have been in a [loving and stable] long term relationship, but I find myself doing crazy stuff I never would have usually.
I used to laid back, cool, quiet and not bothered by little things, maybe I cryed instead, I odnt know, but now I just explode!
I got seperated from my friends at a festival a few months ago, and walked round for three hours trying to find them, each step getting me more wound up that they wouldnt go the meeting place, and were dumb, and I WAS bored and cold and tired, then it started raining, I missed like 3 bands I wanted to see....
GRRRR,.
I found them finally,but stayed calm because I knew otherwise my boyfriend would go all angry like he has been doing recently. I hugged him, against my will.
He grunted something about forgetting something which ****** me off and I just screamed this horrible noise that I was going to kill someone.
Everyone looked round at me but I dint care, because I had slowly beeen getting more and more wound up over the hours of being alone.
why did i explode though?
i would NEVER have done this before.
it embaresses me now to think of things like this, especially as it was in front of some new friends.
I get so wound up over little things and end up making a tit of myself, and need some way to control this.
Taking a little walk obvously does not help.
O dear.

Zari 09-19-2002 02:25 PM

I know this wonít make sense to many of you but donít worry, itís one of those things that a higher part of you will understand whether your troubled mind understands or not. The issue here is forgiveness at the deepest level, not anger. Anger is a wasted emotion. It is impossible for anyone to ďharmĒ you (not the real you). Whenever you are mad at someone else you are really in a situation where you are holding something against yourself, usually a temporal self image that is based largely on illusion anyway. Just forgive knowing that itís impossible for anyone to really hurt the you that is timeless. Anger is too serious a subject for me to take lightly your postings so please donít be offended if I seemed to do that. I have a great deal of respect for otherís feelings and experience. Again, know that there is a part of you that it trying to find itís way that will understand these words and carry them to you in way that will make sense to you if you allow it.

Kytro 10-31-2002 03:52 PM

Hey cookie monster. I have trouble with anger a lot. I used too much more than I do now. I just get ticked off easily, espically when people do things I consider stupid.

Anyhow, i am getter better with recognising the feelings of anger and accepting them with letting it overtake me. kinda like I am angry, and now I will be calm. It works a bit for me.

As for you flatmate, you could either move out if it is too hard, or everytime they annoy you tip a cup of water over them or somthing so they understand that doing it means they have to deal with more than just you being angry. Of course such a action could have bad side-effects and you have to consider the consequences , but somepeople are just selfish and won'tm stop somthing unless it affects them


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