I can't stand my wife's driving - Anger Management Message Board

Totah · 09-26-2003, 01:01 PM

Hi,

It may sound weird, but i'm getting REALLY mad when my wife is making mistakes while driving the car.
What irritates me is that she's doing illogical things like driving too slowly when many cars wait behind or too fast in narrow places. She can't normally park. It takes her 20 minutes to park between 2 cars.

My problem is that each time she does something wrong i'm getting mad. It adds up very fast and within 5 minutes i cannot control myself. I'm not the calmest person but i don't have serious anger problems.

I tried many techniques, but you have to understand that it's really hard to "count to ten with deep breath" while you are running into the next car.

Ideally i should tell her in calm voice what to do, but i panic and start to yell.

I don't want to take permanent medicine like lithium. Is there some kind one-time relaxant?
Is beCALM'd or Relora are any good?

Thanks.

09-27-2003, 12:55 AM

Is there some reason you don't drive instead of your wife?

HeyThere · 09-27-2003, 09:44 PM

Does she drive like this when other people are in the car or just you? LOL. No seriously, just sign her up for a driving school course - It takes the load off your shoulders an you don't have to be that mean ogar that you are really not- " It would be safer for both you and me.... if you took this course" maybe if she takes the safety course as well you could get a discount on your auto insurance.

Tell her youre getting flashbacks and going to cause PTSD.

gardengrub · 09-27-2003, 10:11 PM

Hi Totah,
I can relate to that !
There are a couple of things you can try...
Like Belle said, why dont you drive ?
If your wife has to be driver, try doing things to take your mind off what SHE is doing. You probably arent aware of it but you may be spending the whole trip watching and waiting for her to mess up...The problem if thats happening is she will be SO aware of that and make even more mistakes ! lol
If it doesnt make you ill, try reading or writing while shes driving, send text messages to friends on your phone, anything!
Also one youve gotten where you are going, if parking may take some time, jump out and let her know a designated place where you can meet when she has parked...You dont have to stress about the parking and she will probably find it much easier without you in the car (no offence)
Not sure where in the world you are but could you both take public transport ? Might save you some money and mother nature will be a happy lady too !
Good Luck !

Totah · 09-28-2003, 10:40 AM

Hi, thanks for your replies.

The main reason my wife is driving is to prepare for times when she will have to drive. She might need it to get to work. Also when we visit our friends i might want to take a beer or two.
I tried to listen to music or to read but that didn't help. The moment we approach some dangerous situation, my fuse blows off and i start to yell.
The only solution (if you can call it a solution) i've found so far is to take a can of strong beer before we leave. That slows me down somewhat but doesn't work in 100%.