Anger - Power - Invincibility - Anger Management Message Board

* Free ~ Spirit * · 10-05-2003, 01:51 AM

I'm not a violent person. Never got into physical fights at school, rarely even got into arguements.

Theres something about the feeling of anger. I feel so powerful when I'm angry. Not just normal "fight or flight" response power to be able to defend myself. It's like an evil power. Like I can look at this person who Im mad at and just know that at any time I could do this or that to them and no one could stop me. Having people be afraid of me makes me feel invincible. I'm this person who never hurt anyone and would never (unless it was self defensive of course) Yet they fear me. All these thoughts run through my head... pretty sick stuff, and it doesnt scare me, or disgust me. It makes me laugh and feel more powerful than ever. I don't know how to explain it... from what Ive written I know I sound crazy lol. I am really very nice and caring. I'm not violent, and no I'm not psychotic... I'm pretty sure that this reaction I'm having is due to some things in my childhood.. but still it seems a little extreme. Anyone else have similar experiences? Any tips/advice on controlling it??

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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

goatofthenever · 10-05-2003, 08:49 AM

im like that too, when i get really ****ed i think of different ways i could kill them. no one fears me tho,haha i guess becouse they dont know what im thinking. when im like this i usualy break things or twist my fingers into painful positions or squese my arm and grind my finger nails into it. i tore my fan into pieces becouse i was mad and a wire came loose, now i have to sit in a hot room sweating

. i have no freaking idea how to control it, i was surprised to find out that none of my friends ever get this mad and im just a wierdo :/

* Free ~ Spirit * · 10-05-2003, 01:29 PM

I have a question, what do you think is the cause of it for you?

Like I said in my first post I think the reason I get like that has to do with my childhood.

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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

goatofthenever · 10-05-2003, 02:09 PM

either genetics or seeing my dad blow up all the time. hes insane about it and has been all my life. just the other day he pounds on my door as if hes trying to break it down screaming "TURN OFF THAT ****** MUSIC...ect'. hes never yelled about it before, just one day he exploads, and now i cant turn on my speakers or amp

. so i dont really know, perhaps its seeing that my enitre life or just genetics, who knows?

* Free ~ Spirit * · 10-05-2003, 02:28 PM

Probably a little of both....

How old are you? If ya dont mind me asking...
I'm 19. That sucks that you have to put up with all that from your dad. Just remember not to do that to your kids when youre a parent.

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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.