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Old 02-15-2007, 11:08 AM   #1
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I'm Angry

Dear all,

I usually post on the PTSD board but I feel the need to express:

I'm angry at the commercial driver that ran into me; spreading lies to the police officer pertaining to the accident.

I'm angry at a mysterious witness that was never on the police report, surfacing to spread lies about the accident.

I'm angry that I have injuries that affect my entire body and now need psychological, nerve, sleep and general pain medication.

I'm angry at my own insurance company for raising premiums for an accident that was not my fault, due to their inadequate presentation of evidence, sending me to their doctors that basically say there is nothing wrong with me.

I'm angry because I may need two additional surgeries.

I'm angry because, as a single parent, who has full custody of his child, cannot play sports with or take her to an amusement park or movie as before.

I'm angry the my non-profit org.(to help children), children's book, patented board games, self help book, etc. has to be placed on indefinite hold.

I am angy that there is a need for me to be angry.

I am a step away from hate.

Can someone please inform me of a way to put this all into perspective?

I need to manage this anger and maybe someone on the outside can see what I can't.

Take care
God Bless
FTM

Last edited by Phoenix; 02-15-2007 at 12:04 PM. Reason: further explanation

 
Old 02-15-2007, 02:20 PM   #2
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Re: I'm Angry

FTM---I know I am not an outsider but after reading as clearly as you posted your feelings all I can say is that when I got there I stopped functioning. I couldn't go out alone, I didn't sleep more than an hour or two, didn't talk to anyone including my family. I isolated myself and consumed myself with my anger. Finally driving home from an appt. one day I myself, not my care broke down in the middle of a busy street. couldn't remember how to drive, where i was going or what to do next. That was the day I turned things around. Fear was then my driving force as I thought I had a nervous breakdown and was scared. Body hurt everywhere, didn't know what surgeries if any I was facing., the legal issues piled on top and then my mind finally snapped. It was me or them. I chose me but not before I beat myself almost to death and destroyed my mind to the point that I had no idea what i was doing. I became a recluse for awhile and finally was so angry at myself and scared that I had lost my mind or would because of my obsession with my problems that I could no longer see my way out. I sought help from my PCP who I am close to and he sent me in the different directions he felt would help. I was a non-functioning adult at this point. that's what it took for me to put things in perspective. Please don't let this destroy you as it did me. I am in no different place right now than I was then except my health has improved. still the legal battles, still the broken body but I have regained some sense of normalacy in my mind. that leads me now. Be safe and be careful. You know I care.


Grasshopper

Last edited by ICC; 02-15-2007 at 02:22 PM. Reason: spelling

 
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Old 02-15-2007, 09:12 PM   #3
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Re: I'm Angry

FTM
You have every right to be angry; however, I suspect that the anger is covering up a deeper feeling. You have experienced a great loss and that results in grief. There are stages of grief the first being denial. The second stage is anger. Then bargaining, depression and finally acceptance. Each stage has it's own time table and process. You can do a net search on the stages of grief and get some more information but I suspect you simply need to feel the grief, the loss, the sorrow and sadness of what has happened. You need to say good-bye to a part of your life that no longer functions as it did. There will be a natural grieving. You may even want to have a little ceremony to bury that part of your life that's over.

On a more philosophical note, when stuff like this happens it is one door slamming closed right in your face. And, as the saying goes, when one door is closed another is opened. It may not open right away and it may not be obvious. I have encountered too many people who have had their life crumble to the ground only to find that a year later they themselves say they are happier and in a better situation. In retrospect they are thankful their former life crumbled, that it was worth the pain and suffering. Of course, it's almost impossible to take that view when everything is falling apart but just a little glimmer of a light in a very dark place can be very illuminating. If you have the slightest inkling of hope for the future, that can be enough to support you through this period.

Don't resist anger - or sorrow. Be open to guidance, support and maybe even little miracles, which may come in the most unexpected ways.

I'm not trying to push pollaynish thinking on you. However, the alternative to natural sorrow and grief with a pinch of hope is bitterness and I don't think you want to go there.

 
Old 02-16-2007, 11:12 AM   #4
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Re: I'm Angry

finegane ---your turn on looking at this as grief and dealing with it in the stages of grief is fantastic. your post is wonderful. God bless.


FTM??????? If you read what i went through and how it affected me and then finegane's turn on it you will see it's exactly the way my situation worked. I went through each and every stage since the injuries. Very good advise given here.


Grasshopper

Last edited by ICC; 02-16-2007 at 11:14 AM. Reason: spelling

 
Old 02-16-2007, 01:50 PM   #5
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Re: I'm Angry

Dear Grasshopper and Finegane,

I hear the two of you loud and clear. Their ploy is designed to make me weak and eventually give up; no way !I will keep on "keeping on."

I will survive!

Take care
God Bless
FTM

 
Old 02-17-2007, 04:17 AM   #6
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Re: I'm Angry

FTM---you are right . it is a ploy of thiers. My husband stuck his case out for almost 4 years. WON!! and went on with a good life. We are all different in our strengths. I have had a battle going with employer for almost 10 years so in my case times up. I know i couldn't withstand what my husband did and wouldn't hurt myself anymore. hubby did what he had to do. i did what I had to do and you will do the same. it is your right. I told you before I will back you to the end, but just get concerned about you mentally knowing how this effects you and drains you. You are a grown man and if you feel this is the right path for you and you have the strength without harming yourself more than I will be your main cheerleader. and you CAN be angry, you have that right.

Best of luck on you mission,
Grasshopper

 
Old 02-17-2007, 04:33 AM   #7
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Re: I'm Angry

Dear Grasshopper,

Don't forget the pom-poms; no cheerleader is fully equipped without those .

Something is happening and I just don't know at what level; I feel it.

I believe that these last set of letters may have shed some insight into what I am going through.

If it weren't bigger than me, I would have been the first to begin a class-action suit against the insurance agencies that are doing me a grave injustice; you know that I am not the only one.

If I did this, it would supercede my current PI case, so I'm not even going there.

It's just that I feel there is not enough being done for the person that is "truly injured."

The non profit that I began prohibits me from getting into the politics of the matter (and I cannot even get that on its feet).

Onward and Upward.

Take care
God Bless
FTM

 
Old 02-17-2007, 05:46 AM   #8
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Re: I'm Angry

FTM---i have on my survivor t-shirt (compliments of you) my pom poms in hand and my cheerleader skirt on. you should see this at 53 with a broken body . When my case is settled i have full intentions of writing to my governor, state rep and new congressman. along with these people will come th insurance commissioner. I agree with you that the injured person is injured more so and in more ways than one. there is no protection from them as the lying, the court system , the insurance co.s, some dr.s will all fight tooth and nail to keep us injured and not paid what is rightfully ours. I have even investigated being a WC advocate when I am better. It's a crime and the insurance industry is corrupt. So you see you have "a partner in crime" thorugh your mission. I have just been forced to put it all on hold right now. I have a great attorney and will do nothing to jeapordize my case or his reputation at this point so will sit quietly until all is done and then my capability in writing will come out full force. I'm there for the duraation for you.
Peace my friend,
Grasshopper

 
Old 02-18-2007, 12:39 AM   #9
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Re: I'm Angry

Dear Grasshopper,

If more people thought the way you and I did and were to "stand up" something would be done.

We are the policyholders and without us, there is no "them."

Only thing is that the major insurance companies have attorney's for their attorney's ,attorney's.

It would take a "team" of attorney's to counter them and the fees would be astronomical.

I can only attempt to bring forth my issues in the hope that someone is listening.

My attorney has given me latitude because of the totality of my injuries.

His firm realizes that it is nothing personal with them but I need to seek justice.

I have heard of insurance companies denying liability to the very end in some instances, as I believe that this is one of those.

For 19 month, they have taken the same stance and when I keep sending complaints via the NYS Insurance Department, the have the nerve to say that "he has filed three complaints."

What would I gain by lying to government officials and law enforcement?

If they felt I was lying, I would already be arrested.

Alas, I am but a spec of sand in their enormous sandbox.................

but I am there, nonetheless.

Take care
God Bless
FTM

 
Old 02-18-2007, 07:33 AM   #10
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Re: I'm Angry

Hey FTM, I was wondering if while you were fighting this if you could take your emotional distress out of the mix. Would it be possible to feel confident that the truth is on your side and in the end they cannot win? Seems that your distress is coming from your desperate feeling that they are going to steal justice from you?

 
Old 02-18-2007, 09:59 AM   #11
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Re: I'm Angry

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah View Post
Hey FTM, I was wondering if while you were fighting this if you could take your emotional distress out of the mix. Would it be possible to feel confident that the truth is on your side and in the end they cannot win? Seems that your distress is coming from your desperate feeling that they are going to steal justice from you?
Dear Sannah,

You are getting extremely warm.

I tend to be the pessimist when I hear of people being incarcerated for "umpteen" years and were later found to be innocent.

I just had another epidural in my lumbar region and my legs have gotten significantly weaker.

I am obsessed with justice.

It may be all in my mind but I still need the emergency dispatch transcripts and CD.

You see, they have hurt me in ways that monetary compensation does not and will not satisfy.

They hurt me and "robbed" my daughter, in my eyes.

They robbed thousands of children(at first point) from benefitting from the non-profit organzation I founded (the list goes on).

Settlement prior to trial; NO.

Settlement on the courthouse steps: NO.

Settlement once trial begins: NO.

Take care
God Bless
FTM

Last edited by Phoenix; 02-19-2007 at 02:03 AM. Reason: Clarification

 
Old 02-19-2007, 07:01 AM   #12
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Re: I'm Angry

FTM, how much of your history of injustice is mixing in with this current injustice? It might be helpful to seperate every injustice that you have suffered and deal with each one seperately. I get the feeling that this battle that you are fighting now has every injustice that you have ever suffered rolled into it. Your other injustices need to be dealt with differently.

 
Old 02-19-2007, 11:12 AM   #13
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Re: I'm Angry

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah View Post
FTM, how much of your history of injustice is mixing in with this current injustice? It might be helpful to seperate every injustice that you have suffered and deal with each one seperately. I get the feeling that this battle that you are fighting now has every injustice that you have ever suffered rolled into it. Your other injustices need to be dealt with differently.
Dear Sannah,

Precisely.

This was the proverbial "vehicle that herniated the human's back." (not unlike the straw that broke the camel's).

I just found out this morning that I have peripheral neuropathy in my upper extremeties, which is most likely a result of the MVA.

I can't win for losing but attempt to remain optimistic.

Take care
God Bless
FTM

 
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