It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Anger Management Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 09-24-2007, 12:59 AM   #1
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Anger and Forgiveness

Hello all,

I am new to this particular board and am wondering if someone can offer any advice for my situation.

On July 27, 2005, my life was changed forever by a motor vehicle accident that was not my fault.

To this day I have had two lumbar related surgeries and will most likely need cervical intervention.

I live in constant pain and the progression of injuries have added additional health concerns onto my plate.

This has not only affected me but also my daughter, who I have full custody of.
-------------------------------------
I founded a non profit organization(to help students), was a super, inventor of two board games, a computer program(on paper) and test preparation kit.
Was writing a children's book and was even PTA President(had to eventually resign due to injuries); the list goes on and on.
-------------------------------------
How do I control the anger enough to forgive the driver,"witness" and insurance company, who are all lying about the events of said accident?

The "this is business as usual" angle provides me with no comfort.

How do I manage my anger, when I feel that I have a legitimate right to feel this way?

Phoenix
__________________
When in doubt, post it out.

 
Old 09-24-2007, 11:26 AM   #2
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,178
Sannah HB UserSannah HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Hi Ryan, it seems that the anger is tied into the loss of your ability to be productive?

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 09-24-2007, 12:32 PM   #3
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah View Post
Hi Ryan, it seems that the anger is tied into the loss of your ability to be productive?
Dear Sannah,

I understand that I am not the same person that I was prior to the accident but the inability to do what came so easily is frustrating.

You know that I offer my opinions and advice here but what you don't know is even that is a task in and of itself; yet I try (sometimes I feel that I try too hard and possibly confuse a few people along the way).
------------------------------------
Also, I have an issue with a prominent psychotherapy center in my area.

Since I had a history of using "dual substances" I told them that part of my treatment plan could include a random urinalysis.

One of these came back positive for opiates, which I have never touched.

The psychiatrist looks at me in disbelief and says "it says what it says" and then the therapist chimes in with him.

Long story short, I was peaved and found that the culprit was an opiate derivative prescription I was taking.

I received no apology or anything, even after showing them that they were wrong, so as my trust level left, so did I.

Then I receive a letter stating that I missed too many appointments and the suggest a MICA program for me(the nerve) and ban me for two years.
---------------------------------

Ryan

 
Old 09-25-2007, 11:23 AM   #4
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,178
Sannah HB UserSannah HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phoenix1 View Post

How do I control the anger enough to forgive the driver,"witness" and insurance company, who are all lying about the events of said accident?

The "this is business as usual" angle provides me with no comfort.

How do I manage my anger, when I feel that I have a legitimate right to feel this way?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phoenix1 View Post

I understand that I am not the same person that I was prior to the accident but the inability to do what came so easily is frustrating.
You do have a legitimate reason to be angry. As I know you are aware, though, anger can consume you. How much of your other past unresolved anger is in this pile too? I am trying to put myself in your position and see it from your perspective. Let me do this for a bit and I'll come back.

I know that it really upsets you to be called a liar (the psychotherapy center issue deals with this too. I'm sorry that you had all of that happen).

Last edited by Sannah; 09-25-2007 at 11:25 AM.

 
Old 09-25-2007, 12:38 PM   #5
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah View Post
How much of your other past unresolved anger is in this pile too?
Dear Sannah,

I am so angry that everything else pales in comparison.

My father and other family members I ignore; they don't affect me as they once did.

Ryan

 
Old 09-26-2007, 05:03 AM   #6
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,178
Sannah HB UserSannah HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

How much of your anger is from not being believed about the accident or said differently, that they are trying to make you out as a liar?

Last edited by Sannah; 09-26-2007 at 05:03 AM.

 
Old 09-26-2007, 10:10 AM   #7
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah View Post
How much of your anger is from not being believed about the accident or said differently, that they are trying to make you out as a liar?
Dear Sannah,

All I have on this Earth (besides my daughter) is my word.

My life is so intertwined in this accident, that it's not even funny but sad.

I have already told my attorney that I am willing to take this all the way to a jury.


Sannah,

It's been over two years and you know what I will have to show for it at the end of the PI case?

1) a non disclosure agreement and 2) injuries that will last a lifetime.

Heck, I can't even drive in the car if the radio is on.

Ryan

Last edited by Phoenix; 09-26-2007 at 10:12 AM.

 
Old 09-26-2007, 11:30 AM   #8
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,178
Sannah HB UserSannah HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

So I guess that you have many issues going on with this that are making you angry......

 
Old 09-26-2007, 12:24 PM   #9
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Dear Sannah,

You are correct.

Indirectly, it's as if they harmed my daughter also and that will not go unnoticed.

Ryan

 
Old 09-27-2007, 09:29 AM   #10
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,178
Sannah HB UserSannah HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Ryan, oh, when something affects your children it makes it 10 times worse doesn't it!

 
Old 09-27-2007, 09:37 AM   #11
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 2,361
AnnD HB UserAnnD HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Anger is a normal feeling but I feel there is so much more you haven't said. Is there a law suit happening?

 
Old 09-27-2007, 10:30 AM   #12
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah View Post
Ryan, oh, when something affects your children it makes it 10 times worse doesn't it!
Dear Sannah,

"Truer" words were never spoken.

Ryan

 
Old 09-27-2007, 10:32 AM   #13
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnD View Post
Anger is a normal feeling but I feel there is so much more you haven't said. Is there a law suit happening?
Dear Ann,

There is a personal injury lawsuit filed.

Ryan

 
Old 09-28-2007, 07:06 AM   #14
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,178
Sannah HB UserSannah HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Hey Ryan, I just did a web search on how to get over anger and a lot of good info came up! Just wanted to let you know that I won't be able to come here most of October because I am going on a trip. Didn't want you to think that I disappeared.

 
Old 09-28-2007, 08:10 AM   #15
Facilitator
(male)
 
Phoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 3,852
Blog Entries: 33
Phoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB UserPhoenix HB User
Re: Anger and Forgiveness

Dear Sannah,

I also surfed the web until my :metaphorical" surfboard broke in two.
------------------------------
You and the good doctor enjoy yourselves.

Take care and God Bless.

Ryan

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Parents-Where to draw the line of forgiveness? Painyoufeel Relationship Health 14 04-17-2010 12:53 PM
Bipolar & Forgiveness LovingMeOK Bipolar Disorder 0 08-30-2009 05:58 AM
Need help coping with agitation and flashes of anger seaturtle Bipolar Disorder 13 10-23-2007 05:23 PM
The spiral of Anger/depression/confusion LampAway Anger Management 17 02-13-2007 04:16 AM
Forgiveness ICC Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) 30 01-18-2007 12:43 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added




Top 10 Drugs Discussed on this Board.
(Go to DrugTalk.com for complete list)
Celexa
Effexor
Lexapro
Lithium
Paxil
  Prozac
Risperdal Valium
Xanax
Zoloft




TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Administrator (12), Seraph (11), rosequartz (6), ciqala (4), Phoenix (3), janewhite1 (2), melinasw (2), MMWMMW (2), ladybud (2), swf (1)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1180), MSJayhawk (1004), Apollo123 (905), Titchou (848), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (759), ladybud (754), midwest1 (669), sammy64 (668), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:15 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!