Re: Deeper Issues?
I am 37 a professional with an MBA, I have never been in trouble in my life, and I have a great marriage. Yet NOTHING I have ever done has been good enough for my mother. Yet my sister who was pregnant before her and her husband marriage, has abused alcohol and drugs in the past and just received an associates degree at age 35, has always been my mothers favorite. My whole life I have heard nothing but negative things about men from my mother, including many insults aimed at my direction. My mother never had to work in her life as my father has always taken care of her. He was no help when I was growing up, as he was always silent, letting her act as she did.
My mother when confronted always enjoyed playing the victim, she loves drama, and causes more than her share. I had my head bashed against a deadbolt once when my mother overheard a friend say something when we were playing in my backyard, and mistook it for me. Everytime anyone did anything amongst my friends, I was always yelled at too. Once when a friend's mother tried to correct my mother, I was grabbed by the back of the kneck and virtually dragged to the car. Yet at the same time, she has always made excuses for my sister, or blamed her actions on the man that she was with.
I could go on with my examples, but what I am getting at is that it may very well be that your wife has a problem with men. You do not mention that she ever took out anything on your daughters, but seems to relish abusing yourself and your son.
My advise to you, unless you want to end up alienated from your son later in life, is to protect him from her abuse, put him above her and seek help in that direction. You mentioned her faith, though it may not be your's, have you considered speaking to her minister? Maybe he or she could speak with your wife? If she does not seem to want to reach a solution with you, maybe they could help to influence her?
What ever you do, stop the violence towards your son, I barely speak to my parents and keep my 10 year old son away from them as much as possible. They see their grandchild maybe twice a year, and actually wonder why I do not seem to like them.