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Old 05-03-2012, 12:29 PM   #1
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Jessicat223 HB User
Concerned

I have been having anger issues for years that are now involving me at work.
I am an owner of a small business and have had several run-ins with customers. I have gotten a few books/workbooks on anger management, but the book- to me it seems- does not provide enough support.
When an anger episode comes on, it turns into rage and I feel a wave of dizziness come over me. Some people say I say things that I do not remember saying- like a blackout.
I feel like if I let it someone bother me, I cannot control what comes out of my mouth. I never want to hit or use a gun, but I just say awful things to people.
About an hour later- if I feel remorse and I want to apologize- or if I do not feel remorse for what I said- I ruminate about what happened and it even gets into my dreams.
How do I stop a situation before it starts? I have people here at work, who I have asked to step in- like a bouncer- and escort an angry customer out if they get loud. I feel if I do not get the last word or insult in- then I look weak and defeated. I feel disgusting afterward. Please help.

 
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slenderella (05-03-2012)
Old 05-03-2012, 12:52 PM   #2
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Re: Concerned

I feel if I do not get the last word or insult in- then I look weak and defeated. I feel disgusting afterward. Please help.

I think that this is an untruth, that you look weak and defeated if you don't get the last word in. I sympathize with your situation! It's about self control, I guess, and knowing when you need to walk away. You're not in easy circumstances, dealing with customers, but if they are your bread and butter, allowing them the last word might be worth it. It sounds like you are getting defensive, and so maybe you need to look at that in therapy.

blessings, Sue

 
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