I hope this is the right place to post, i see a lot of the threads dont have much replies but im not really looking for advice but if you have any i appreciate it, just somewhere to rant before i go crazy, i hope you dont mind.
I have been suffering from anger, frustration and anxiety for most of my life and it never seems to go away. I suffer from MD which i expect causes a lot of my frustrations that leads to anger.
I live with family as i wouldnt be able to cope on my own because of MD and im finding it difficult with one particular family member they are constantly negative all day long, they find a problem with everything which sometimes i dont even think there is a problem,not just with me but everything, they constantly moan and most of the time i get into an argument with this person because i just cant take it anymore with the constant doom and gloom so this leads to me shouting like a maniac because of anger and they always comment on my shouting like 'keep your hair on' or 'the neighbours will hear you' which obviously makes me worse when it over im usually so frustrated i want to cry.
I try so hard to keep out the way or not start anything just to keep the place calm but i constantly have this dread in me. I can wake up feeling happy and one negative thing from this person changes my whole day im sitting full of rage ready to start if they are and my teeth are clenching.
Don't get me wrong even though all this i love the person to bits but its making my life unbearable i try to ignore the negatives or comments but im finding it so hard even chaging to a positive conversation but by this time the person has annoyed me so much i find it hard to be nice or positive. Even when they have been moany and then come in and be all nice i find it hard being nice back!!
Just wish i could stay calm when they say stuff so im not adding fuel and maybe it wouldnt be so bad but the more they keep coming in with things to say the more they wind me up that i just go mad which doesnt help.
I sometime ignore what they say or try and avoid them and they take it i have fell out with them and go in bad silent mood which is even more awkward.
Phew sorry about all that just feel really frustrated and dont know what to do i which i could just chill out more and not let things annoy me, maybe i need to meditate