Why me??????? - Anxiety Message Board

lucky charms · 05-29-2004, 12:54 AM

This is my first time to the Anxiety message board so hello.I just felt that I needed to spill my soul out to people that can relate.
Im a 28 yr old female that suffers from an extreme case of Anxiety and panic attacks, granted I do have a thyroid problem ,but this anxiety goes back way before the throid problem even began.Any ways why cant I be normal? All I do is sit and dwell upon things that I may could die with.I mean everyday I wake up and think this is it..Im going to have a heart attack or a stroke or I just know that I have cancer.Oh it gets better than that sometimes I feel like im suffering from alzheimers or I am at the begining stages b/c I may have forget something.
Why cant I just be like normal people that have happy little lives and tons of friends..Why do I live in dread every day? Why am I so alone?...I am so sick of worrying I mean it has damn consumed me.
I take xanax twice a day .5 , but here lately I feel its not doing anything for me.. : ( Thanks for letting me vent.

abbygirl2 · 05-29-2004, 02:33 AM

Hi sorry you are going through this. Many of us are in the same boat. I worry about crap like that alot. It is a daily struggle most days, and I like you feel little relief from the benzo's(although I am on Ativan instead of Xanax). Its been a long time since I have been normal and hung out with friends and its to the point where I seldom leave my house anymore. I don't enjoy anything, and overthink everything. I am so forgetful which is a common symptom of anxiety but its frustrating. Do you have something to keep yourself busy, I find I am much worse when I am sitting around doing nothing(on the pc, or watching tv etc). Of course you can always bend our ears here as much as you want, we all understand where your coming from. I too have had anxiety all my life.

Take care, and keep us updated.

Abby

bingling · 05-29-2004, 12:16 PM

hi sorry to hear you have this too
I too wish I could just be normal..but I'm not.
It happens to more people than you think...1 in 8 people suffer from anxiety.
So really your not so different.It also tends to happen to people more ages 14-26..why?..Maybe we are less satisfied with our lives..or maybe partly to do with diet.I would imagine most people in that age group don't eat so well..which puts added stress on our bodies.You can get through this!
This is my second time on meds..I went off 6 months ago ..and it came back again.I have been comming to this board for 2 years now...and one positive thing I can tell you is..none of the people that were here 2 years ago..are still suffering..they have all gotten better..and moved on with their lives.Exept for me of course...but I have issues..that I need to deal with before I can get fully better.Hang in there...you are not alone in this.
It will get better

Jchandra88 · 05-29-2004, 03:05 PM

Likeme28,
I share in your pain...along with millions of other people, I'm sure. I never realized how many people suffer from anxiety until I joined this board. This is the only board that I've been on where people actually seem to care about others though, which is nice. I, too, wonder why I can't have a normal life.. I look around me at everyone else and they all seem content and even the ones that are having problems at work or classes or something seem to be dealing with it reasonably well. I had always been a constant worrier throughout my life, stemming even as far back as gradeschool. Although I hated the worrying and stomach aches it gave me (was sure I'd have an ulcer by highschool), I never thought it could cause the symptoms that I've been suffering in the past couple weeks. I never realized how powerful the mind could be. I talk to everyone that I can about it, but it's hard to describe without sounding insignificant. Everyone seems to think it's not that big of a deal...and my husband seems to think it's just mind over matter. It's hard to explain that it's not that simple... I would love to be able to go back to how life was before all this started.. It's so irritating that no one seems to understand except for the people on this board. I had to take a sick leave from work because of these symptoms..
Just wanted you to know, we all understand and are here...

bertie6 · 05-30-2004, 05:12 PM

hiya there,

I've been an anxiety sufferer going on eight years now...on a positive note...my anxiety is not as bad as it used to be...Of course i am still a worrier and negative thinker and when i stress, i tend to get bad anxiety; However, once you get to know more about your condition, and get to know many ways to try to keep it from running your life, you will, in time, get better. There is no magic pill where someone is going to be 100 percent cured (and those who are, well, lucky them)...but Eventually you will be able to cope with it better, and see it as somewhat of a "pest" instead of seeing it as something that can ruin you. I have been where you have been..i was 22 when my anxiety started, had to quit college and work for several months. Now, I am working full time as a teacher (which can cause a lot of anxiety in itself!=) and enjoy going out occassionally. What other ppl said to you already is true...anytime you need to vent, or feel scared or worried...this is a good board to come to. Feel free to post when you want...feel free to email when you want, too. Best of Luck!!=) Rose P.S you might want to pick up a few hobbies that can distract you from your anxiety..like reading or puzzles, going to movies, or crafts and such...walking tends to do wonders for me...now if i can stick to a regular routine of it...=)