Feeling an eerie calm? - Anxiety Message Board

Punkdizzle · 03-29-2005, 06:42 AM

I have struggled with OCD and anxiety for about 10yrs now. and this morning was the first time something like this has happened to me.. when i wake up in the morning i am super anxious and have alot of racing thoughts.. today i woke up feeling calm as if nothing was wrong with me and as though i never had a problem to begin with.. i felt so calm about everything even trying to think about things that would usually spark the anxiety did nothing i was able to just brush them off without obsessing about it.. so this is freaking me out i am now starting to worry that something isnt right or something worse is gonna happen because i cant get anxious i know that sounds odd that i want to feel the anxiety and i should be happy i am feeling good but i have lived with it for so long its almost weird to expect it and not have it hit me.. any thoughts on this or anyone have this happen to them?

Graciecat · 03-29-2005, 07:40 AM

That has happened to me twice in my life and it is a little scary at first...it's like you're waiting for the other shoe to drop.

When I look back on it now I realize that I've suffered from OCD since I was a little girl...but when you're that young you really don't think there's anything wrong...I just thought that everyone was like that.
I can also look back and remember times when I was very young that I had what I now know are panic attacks...but again I was so young that I just thought I was supposed to feel that way....I thought everyone did.

One night when I was 16 years old I was taking clothes out of the dryer, feeling fine not a care in the world and all of a sudden this horrible feeling came over me...I won't go into all the different things I felt, because they were your basic panic attack symptoms and anyone who's ever had a panic attack knows what they are.
I thought I was going crazy...went to the Doctor and after a zillion tests came back normal he told me I had OCD and panic disorder.
I went on medication for the panic disorder...nothing has ever worked for the OCD so I just live with that.
Anyway I went for 7 years taking the medication, but still have small attacks every now and then.
Then one day I woke up and I knew something was different...I hadn't taken any medication, but I felt "Normal" and at first I couldn't understand what was going on.
This went on for weeks and finally I went back to my Doctor and told him what was going on.
He told me that sometimes...especially in people who have a family history of panic disorder...the attacks come on out of the blue and they sometimes go away out of the blue.
Nothing has changed, they're just gone...but he told me there was always the chance that they might come back.
I weaned off of my medication and I didn't have a hint of a panic problem for another 7 years.

My Doctor was right...after being panic/anxiety free for 7 years one night out of nowhere they were back...this time they stayed for about 6 and half years.
Again, I woke up one morning and they were gone again...right now I'm panic, anxiety and medication free.

Sorry, I didn't mean to write a book I just wanted to tell you my story and let you know that the attacks can simply just leave for periods of time.