Is this social anxiety? - Anxiety Message Board

mtk21 · 05-22-2005, 08:24 PM

Ever since I was much younger I've always been very, very scared of social situations and always think too hard on what I say to others. Most of the time I think for hours or days about something I said to someone that was what I thought as being "stupid." I know that it's no big deal and that people probably forgot I even said something or made that mistake within a day, but I just can't stop worrying or thinking about the little mistakes I make in social situations.

I worry and become nervous and short of breath when I think back to something that happened that didn't go perfect and I get a horrible feeling in my chest. I worry about what others think about me and worry about practically everything. It's not really like a depression because I guess you could say I'm happy, but I just worry about everything and hate anything social. I have quite a few friends and I can talk to them easily, but anyone I don't know well I just don't like talking to. Is this a form of anxiety?

mtk21 · 05-25-2005, 09:42 PM

bump....If it isn't anxiety could it be something else? I never really have "attacks." Or at least I don't think I do.

pooch21 · 05-26-2005, 12:51 AM

too much self-talk can leads too worrying
and make you anxious.

i am not sure if it's anxiety, but
may be a cause leading to it.

Liah20 · 05-26-2005, 03:10 AM

I have suffered with social anxiety since my early teens, and your symptoms sound like a milder version of SA to me. Do you feel extremely self-conscious walking into rooms where others already are? Do you dread the thought of public speaking? Do you ever get moments where you're convinced all eyes are on you? Are you overly self-critical? Well it sounds like you're very self-critical of any social interactions that you feel 'could have gone better', right? Me too... let me tell you, I know exactly what you're experiencing! Do you experience any of the other symptoms ive listed? If not, it sounds to me like you may suffer certain SA tendencies, rather than full-blown SA, so to speak. {REMOVED}

What i'm trying to say is, if your symptoms are significantly affecting your normal functioning, e.g. by preventing you from being assertive when you wish to or by causing you to avoid certain social encouters, etc., then you may well benfit from seeking professional advice. I can personally recommend CBT - it worked fantastically for me. I am now much better able to control my SA and have even become (dare I say it!!) a little self-confident! But! CBT is not necessarily the only route you could take. Basically, the main point is, help is out there - if you only reach out for it.

Hope ive helped you. Take Care.

Ploch · 05-26-2005, 03:40 PM

Kev and Liah,

You have both described something that i have suffered for years with! Fear of any social situation and how i will be looked at or thought of has hampered me my entire life. It has overwhelmed me to the point that i have pretty much accepted the fact that i will never overcome this problem. I am not able to do any of the things that i REALLY want to or even have to.

And now that i have left all of my friends and family for a new career on the West coast, these feelings have become particularly acute. Pretty much to the point where my confidence is shot and i question my decisions constantly. How do i start at making myself better (if possible)? Where do i start? What is CBT? any help would be appreciated tremendously and i hope things work out for you Kev.

Paul